WTF happened to Howard!
 

I've now realized that Howard the Duck (il Duce) hasn't been on this forum for the best part of three weeks now, people come and go sure, but people with his post-count that post daily don't usually disappear overnight or do they?

We should start a pool with hypothetical scenarios that are at least feasible given his slightly cryptic posts over the last few months. Here's a few of mine,

1) Joined a cult
2) Joined a church
3) In jail
4) Burned all his stuff and has become a hermit somewhere in Malaysia
5) In the hospital

6) On vacation
7) Recently fired

What's funny is that even the most outlandish scenario is still within the realm of possibility with Howard.

8) On the lamb.

9) On the Lim

10) Playing Skyrim

:rofl: the most likely.

11) Dead?

Considering what he normally posts (posted?) my guess is he got fired and his life fell apart around him. Or he attacked someone and is in jail. Or he joined a cult. Or all of the above.

Google Image Result for http://lunkiandsika.files.wordpress.com/2011/09/pulp-fiction-1994-ving-rhames-bruce-willis-sex-prisoners.png

Godspeed Howard.

10) Moved to North Korear.

I can't tell if Howard is more of a Marcellus or a whatever-the-boxer's-name-is. Either way he'd pick the sword.
But yeah, I'd put my money on #4 and that he left his material possessions behind and became an ascetic.
Or
11)Fell into complete nihilism and is plotting to assassinate political leaders in Malaysia.

#12 He partied with Stu, Phil and Alan. Did a line of cocaine, temporarily suspending his heart rate and now finds himself in a hotel ice cooler.

13) Masturbating
14) Taking a very long "#2"

15) On a road somewhere with strange sounds of knocking and muffled screams emanating from the boot (trunk) of his car, trying to look innocent as he's pulled over for speeding, keeping one hand lightly on the gun at his side....

God I hope I'm not right! :eek:

16) Got cured, and realized that all of his previous contribution here could not be faced with his new-found level of self-awareness.

17) Having an insane amount of weird, kinky sex.

Howard may had given up trying to assimilate. Maybe he is back with his own kind!

18.) Slept with the wrong guy's wife/daughter/pet.

19. He's busy screwing a family member.

That's been brought up already:

20. He's moved to Hollywood, he somehow landed the role of "Leslie Chow" in Hangover III.

Technically a sheep is not usually a pet but I'll change it.

The same thing George Costanza did in "The Opposite".

I was about to suggest that he realised everything he posted was terrible, then I realised that is probably the only thing that would be completely impossible for him to do.

21. Transcended to a higher plane of existance.

22. Got caught masturbating on a bus and was attacked by angry commuters and is now in traction waiting to be taken to jail.

23. Started dancing to "Gangnam Style" in the middle of the street. After twenty minutes without stopping, people realized that there was something wrong and long story short, he is now screaming "HEY! SEXY LADY!" at the top of his lungs wearing a straight jacket in a padded cell.

23. Maybe he decided to get off forums and have a life.

:rofl::rofl:

I'm pretty sure if either of those happened he'd have become an Internet Meme by now and we would have heard of it.

I think that that is the most ludicrous suggestion yet.

Can we save threads like this for members who actually contribute.

Thank you.