The Spam thread

[Trollheart]

We all get it, whether we want it (0.0000000001%) or don't (99.9999999999999%) so let's use it. Post the most ridiculous/funny/unbelievable/inappropriate/stupid spam message you've received, and let's see how REALLY stupid spammers are.

Here's one I found that ALMOST made me laugh. What I love about this is that they act like it's a conversation between two people who are desperately worried that I'm losing out on a big chance! My own comments are bolded, in red.

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Hi there Deryck,

I can see you have signed up with one of our casinos (No I didnt) in the past and didn't claim your welcome bonus... so I've been told by my supervisor to look after you!

To begin with, you will need to click on the below link I have generated for you:
http://casrewards.com/affiliate/refe...57_1_22:dm-pss
(Oh yeah, I'm gonna do THAT! Well, I was only born yesterday...)
Then follow the steps on the page to claim your new €£$500 sign up bonus.

I'm glad to be of service and hope you enjoy the rest of your day! If you have any technical issues don't hesitate to contact our support team.
(Who I'm sure don't exist, as this is purely spam and nothing else)
Kind regards,

CasinoRewards Loyalty Team
To unsubscribe, forward this message to unsubscribes-ctg0aib7waaa6ktavnmupzh....c-rewards.com

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From: Anthony - CasinoRewards Loyalty Supervisor
Sent: 21/06/2012
To: Loyalty CasinoRewards
Subject: RE: Deryck OByrne sign up offer authorization

Hi,

I've had a look at Deryck's account and i think you're right, it's a shame they'll miss out on a bonus just because they didn't get to chat with you!
(Note that due to the spelling of my name they're unsure if I'm male or female, so they're hedging their bets by referring to "their" instead of "his" or even "her")
Can you do me a favour and get back to Deryck ASAP?

Also what email address have you been trying? I can see two email address entries in the system. Have you tried this one - trollheart@gmail.com ?
(I've only ever had one email address)
Regards

Anthony
CasinoRewards Loyalty Supervisor

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From: Loyalty CasinoRewards
Sent: 21/06/2012
To: Anthony - CasinoRewards Loyalty Supervisor
Subject: Deryck OByrne sign up offer authorization

Hey Anthony,

Hope you're well. Just a quick mail with regards to one of my existing players - (Never signed up for, or played in, an online casino in my life. Hate the damn things!)I tried to contact a player called Deryck the other day because they never claimed their sign up bonus. (Didn't claim cos I didn't sign up)
I didn't really manage to talk to them and i think it's unfair that they won't get it now! I've had a look at their CasinoRewards account and I think they deserve the €£$500 sign up bonus. (Which is it? If they know me --- or claim they do --- it should be Euros, but they've hedged their bets again --- as they obviously haven't a clue who I am or where I come from --- by putting in Pounds and also Dollars!)

Just wanted to double check with you that I could authorize a new €£$500 sign up bonus for Deryck?

Kind regards,

CasinoRewards Loyalty Team

Footnote: People actually FALL for this sort of thing?

[Howard the Duck]

just one of the random spam that pops up in a forum I go to:-


DYI Photo Booth might be the most recent sensation in having a great time or thrilling at celebrations. Photobooth may be the favorite area that Photo Booths are widely-used. Both young and old alike fancy to park yourself in the Photo Booth and have humorous shots taken.
http://client.alexa.com/common/image...icRankings.gif

[Blarobbarg]

I had a Viagra one involving Norse mythology and Thor's "hammer" being huge and making the other gods jealous (and goddesses all up in a tizzy) , but I didn't save it. Too bad, because it had me cracking up when I read it.

[Frownland]

I got this spam message that was oddly poetic a few weeks ago. What goes in the space is supposedly a picture but my email never supports images. Here goes:

I need a man's shoulder!
Type me few words... IТ...m bored





Her impious shoulders and surroundings gave residence a cranium of cave ditch, a insulting alley thereto liked. The prompt occasion adds quickly his life for his ellipse, so that not one of thermometer might regret major.
It was suitable, it was beaver, and I began squeezing a girls saturation, and unconcerned her to apply me. Unicorn had got inconvenient to then they dissimilar, and had been suited at the monastery, and had been broke and mixed, and did not interpret period beefsteak habit was backing.

[The Batlord]

Originally Posted by Frownland

Her impious shoulders and surroundings gave residence a cranium of cave ditch, a insulting alley thereto liked. The prompt occasion adds quickly his life for his ellipse, so that not one of thermometer might regret major.
It was suitable, it was beaver, and I began squeezing a girls saturation, and unconcerned her to apply me. Unicorn had got inconvenient to then they dissimilar, and had been suited at the monastery, and had been broke and mixed, and did not interpret period beefsteak habit was backing.

I think that just might be the filthiest thing I've ever read. Bots are disgusting.

[Trollheart]

Originally Posted by Frownland

I got this spam message that was oddly poetic a few weeks ago. What goes in the space is supposedly a picture but my email never supports images. Here goes:

I need a man's shoulder!
Type me few words... IТ...m bored





Her impious shoulders and surroundings gave residence a cranium of cave ditch, a insulting alley thereto liked. The prompt occasion adds quickly his life for his ellipse, so that not one of thermometer might regret major.
It was suitable, it was beaver, and I began squeezing a girls saturation, and unconcerned her to apply me. Unicorn had got inconvenient to then they dissimilar, and had been suited at the monastery, and had been broke and mixed, and did not interpret period beefsteak habit was backing.

Quickly! Dial 911! This person is having a stroke!!!

[[MERIT]]

Micah Schafer | Facebook

This is Micah Schafer. He is a bad person. Not just like regular bad, but the worst person that I have ever met in my life. If you feel the need to spam, send it this motherf*cker's way. Any and everything bad that will ever happen to him will not be enough to tip the scales of karma in his favor. He is the worst of the worst. May he die a slow, painful, agonizing death