Stuff That Is Awesome

**Frownland** · 01-07-2015, 03:53 PM

So I wrote this Facebook post last night

Quote:

In response to the new Facebook guidelines I hereby declare that my copyright is attached to all of my personal details, illustrations, pornography, paintings, crafts, professional photos and videos, etc. (as a result of the Berner Convention).
For commercial use of the above, my written, notarized, and hand-delivered consent is needed at all times that call for harsh measures!
(Anyone reading this can copy this text and paste it on their Facebook Wall. This will place them under the ridicule of their less-gullible friends.)
By the presently made up word, communiqué, I notify Facebook that it is strictly forbidden to disclose, copy, distribute, inseminate, or take any other action against me on the basis of my criminal activity, this profile and/or its contents. The aforementioned prohibited actions also apply to employees, pimps, students, hitmen, agents and/or any staff under Facebook's direction or control. The content of this profile is private and confidential information for my children to gawk at in ten years. The violation of my privacy is punished by law (UCC 1 1-308-308 1-103 and the Imaginus Rome Statute).
Facebook is now an open collective of fools. All members are recommended to publish a notice like this to make their friends laugh, or if you prefer, you may copy and paste this version because I'm so hilarious. If you do not publish a statement at least once, you will be tacitly allowing the use of elements such as your photos as well as the information contained in your profile status updates by gremlins, who sometimes also work for FaceBook..

...And two of my friends have already posted it as a status. I almost fell out of my chair laughing. I can't wait to see how many more will out themselves as a fool.

The Batlord · 01-07-2015, 03:56 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Frownland

So I wrote this Facebook post last night

...And two of my friends have already posted it as a status. I almost fell out of my chair laughing. I can't wait to see how many more will out themselves as a fool.

Seeing as how I'm not a douchetard, I don't use Facebook. So, what's the context for this?

**Frownland** · 01-07-2015, 03:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by The Batlord

Seeing as how I'm not a douchetard, I don't use Facebook. So, what's the context for this?

It's a hoax that douchetards are buying into. They think if you post that as your status (minus the absurd bits, those are my creation), FB can't use their images and all that. It's in the user agreement when you make an account that they can do just that and a status doesn't change that.

ladyislingering · 01-07-2015, 09:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Frownland

So I wrote this Facebook post last night

...And two of my friends have already posted it as a status. I almost fell out of my chair laughing. I can't wait to see how many more will out themselves as a fool.

I know a guy that wrote this

Quote:

Channel 13 News was just talking about this big change in Facebook's privacy policy. As of January 5, 2015 at 5:29 pm Pacific Standard Time in the State off Washington, I do not give Facebook or any celestial entities associated with Facebook permission to use my pictures, posterior informational measurements meaning taking data on in regards to such topics, or past, present, or future posts. By this statement, I give notice to Facebook, its late-night partners, business and otherwise, as well as all users of these sites and applications, it is strictly forbidden to disclose, copy, distribute, or take any other action against me based on this profile and/or its contents without my expressed written permission signed and dated in sanguine fluid that must be proven to be mine in the presence of an attorney. The content of this profile is private and confidential information. The violation of privacy can be punished by law (Subdivision 3 Section 10 of RT I 2010, 3, 4, of the Estonian international court, part 3 of RCW16.52.205 of Washington State Law and Article 5 of the Rome Statute). Punishment to be passed can be up to 20 year in prison, a $250,000 fine, the attachment of multiple users to create a multi-limbed, multi-cellular entity that shares one gastrointestinal tract with a 37 user minimum, or all of the previous. Furthermore, should this notice be violated, all who violate it must give the person, who posted this, the rights to their eternal soul, a lifetime supply of chocolate, and 1.5 pennies. Anyone who posts this and a conflict is created between the two, all parties involved agree to sign a petition that states that My Little Pony should be played at the next United Nations meeting, while the Australian Prime Minister performs a river dance with the Russian Presidency to the tune of Tunak Tunak Tun sang by a Member of the Royal Family of the Kingdom of Belgium. NOTE: Facebook is now a public entity. All members must post a note like this. If you prefer, you can copy and paste this version. If you do not publish a statement at least once it will be tactically allowing the use of your photos, as well as the information contained in the profile status updates. This post may be shared, anyone on my friends list has permission to do so or their own personal friends list

and he kept updating me on how many people were reposting it.

I think he had like 3 or 4.

I fucking hate the human race sometimes. They're so stupid.