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04-14-2012, 09:49 AM | #101 (permalink) | |
Whatever, dude
Join Date: Feb 2012
Posts: 70
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I know how ya feel when it comes to not knowing if someone 'liking' you. I summed it up to self-doubt in my case, I didn't think she would want to be with someone like me. Turns out she did but was waiting for me to act more confident and take a swing. Whoops. Lesson learned, though. I suppose your case is a little different but it could be the same issue. Do you doubt yourself a lot? ... I've been stressin on finding a new job, how my current coworker is a self righteous arrogant dickhole with fartbreath, finding a new apartment that's not on the outskirts of the city with a bunch of scary ghetto people that wanna kill/mug/sell bad drugs to me, and meeting some new people/a purdy ladyfolk. |
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04-14-2012, 10:29 AM | #102 (permalink) | |
nothing
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: everywhere
Posts: 4,315
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The age difference can be pretty substantial too, especially if it's between early and late 20s, but the addition of a child is a completely different league. On the other hand, just because she has a child doesn't always mean she wants you as replacement father, but in these cases do recognize that you're little more than a temporary plaything. Communication (the challenging, honest and direct kind) is vital in any relationship, but even more so when there's a child involved. You say you'd give it a try if you had the chance. What is it exactly you want to try? The ONLY thing this woman is offering more than the average single girl you'll meet is a child and the massive pile of stresses and issues that go along with being a single parent with a Ex who will always be in the picture unless one of them wants to abandon their child. If that sounds appealing to you, you might need therapy, but if not, then do it up I guess . Otherwise, say thanks, let her know you're flattered, but that you don't feel that you're mature enough to take on the responsibilities of a relationship with a single parent. Who knows, maybe all she really wants is a friend with benefits while the child is away (in which case, wrap it up and knock yourself out! ) Whatever you do, don't lead her (and yourself) on by saying what you think needs to be spoken or whatever misguided 'right' thing rom-coms have drilled into so many heads. Be honest with yourself, then be clear with her. I know it seems selfish to focus on yourself first but ultimately you need to be comfortable with who you are and what you want from a relationship to the point where you can communicate that clearly to your partner before any real intimacy starts happening. Otherwise you'll likely never find yourself in a mutually satisfying successful long term relationship. |
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04-19-2012, 07:48 AM | #106 (permalink) | |
Nae wains, Great Danes.
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: Where how means why.
Posts: 3,621
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Pretty much cried at least once a day the past while. I don't even know why really. Consistent sadness.
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