Is It Better To Have Loved, And Lost? Than To Have Never Loved At All?

crukster · 04-12-2011, 03:38 PM

you can't love and lose imo. It transcends time, space, physical parameters. Love is eternal. When you really love someone and they love you, that's a feeling you never lose, even if you're apart, indefinitely.

But if you're asking, is it better to think you were in love and lose it, than to never think it, then I'd say no. I.e. is it better to be very close to someone and then have them leave or to never be close, well, imo it's better to have reality and realise that people come and go, even ones you care about a lot. Just enjoy things while they last.

But actual love, you can't lose that.

That probably doesn't make much sense, reading it back.

@Occulthawk, I'm gonna call bull**** man, no way you love every girl you've boned. Maybe I'm wrong, I'm not psychic, but I don't think you'd talk crudely about sex if it was true. You can't call it love when you meet some girl in a nightclub and ragg her brains out. It's awesome, fair dues, but it's not love, dude.

Saying "I love every Woman I've had sex with" only really counts for anything if you like marriede your "childhood sweetheart" or some ****, it's a bit of a bare faced lie to just say "I love every girl I get in the sack" If you ask me.

Fair enough we've all probably said it to get some action, but let's be honest here man, you honestly telling us that's true?

s_k · 04-12-2011, 03:51 PM

Yes. But I wouldn't have said yes after I had just broken up with my girlfriend.
At that time anything would have been better...

djchameleon · 04-12-2011, 04:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by crukster

you can't love and lose imo. It transcends time, space, physical parameters. Love is eternal. When you really love someone and they love you, that's a feeling you never lose, even if you're apart, indefinitely.

But if you're asking, is it better to think you were in love and lose it, than to never think it, then I'd say no. I.e. is it better to be very close to someone and then have them leave or to never be close, well, imo it's better to have reality and realise that people come and go, even ones you care about a lot. Just enjoy things while they last.

But actual love, you can't lose that.

That probably doesn't make much sense, reading it back.

it makes perfect sense.

The beginning is a bit all over the place but once you get down to what you really mean to say. I get it. You pretty much explained a little more about what I said earlier in the thread.

Quote:

Originally Posted by crukster

@Occulthawk, I'm gonna call bull**** man, no way you love every girl you've boned. Maybe I'm wrong, I'm not psychic, but I don't think you'd talk crudely about sex if it was true. You can't call it love when you meet some girl in a nightclub and ragg her brains out. It's awesome, fair dues, but it's not love, dude.

Saying "I love every Woman I've had sex with" only really counts for anything if you like marriede your "childhood sweetheart" or some ****, it's a bit of a bare faced lie to just say "I love every girl I get in the sack" If you ask me.

Fair enough we've all probably said it to get some action, but let's be honest here man, you honestly telling us that's true?

exactly! that's why I called him out on it and he knows I struck a nerve so he had to resort to using childish insults that I haven't heard since grade school.

duga · 04-12-2011, 04:37 PM

I feel heartbreak is something everyone should experience. It really teaches you a lot about yourself. Whether or not you think love is real, heartbreak sure as hell is. It's the result of having something that used to be constant and reliable in your life ripped away all of the sudden. That's when people get desperate and that's when you see how low you can really go.

As for me, however, I'm still feeling the repercussions of being in love once. I'm over the girl...I'm not even attracted to her in the slightest anymore. However, I am now incredibly guarded when I meet new people. I've dated around but it wasn't until just recently that I met someone with real potential. I didn't expect this, but that potential scares the **** out of me. Now I have this conflict in my head where on one side I want to be around her all the time...on the other side, I don't want to get stomped on again.

Human emotions are fragile things. We evolved them to help us survive (you love the things that help you live...thus being monogamous and being able to pump out a constant supply of offspring; you hate the things that hurt you etc etc). This came into conflict when we evolved self awareness and a higher intelligence. Those logical thoughts find a hard time interpreting the primal and irrational emotions we have. That's is why love is such a big topic for all of us. Is it real? Is it necessary? No one will ever know.

s_k · 04-12-2011, 05:34 PM

Mmmm, you're very right when you say heartbreak teaches you a lot about yourself.
I can honestly say I've become a better person since me and my ex broke up after 6 years.
I can't say I'm over her. She's not really over me either. I guess we'll never be. But we are over the sadness.

**Janszoon** · 04-12-2011, 08:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by djchameleon

I don't have a problem getting laid bro. you are talking to the wrong person with that.

~~Sansa Stark~~ · 04-12-2011, 08:26 PM

more like

**Janszoon** · 04-12-2011, 08:29 PM

Nice, but I still say it's more like the "I've laid lots of times" scene I posted.

CanwllCorfe · 04-12-2011, 08:53 PM

I don't think so. And instead of trying to explain it myself, I'll leave it to one of my favorite poets:

Quote:

All through an empty place I go,
And find her not in any room;
The candles and the lamps I light
Go down before a wind of gloom.
Thick-spraddled lies the dust about,
A fit, sad place to write her name
Or draw her face the way she looked
That legendary night she came.

The old house crumbles bit by bit;
Each day I hear the ominous thud
That says another rent is there
For winds to pierce and storms to flood.

My orchards groan and sag with fruit;
Where, Indian-wise, the bees go round;
I let it rot upon the bough;
I eat what falls upon the ground.

The heavy cows go laboring
In agony with clotted teats;
My hands are slack; my blood is cold;
I marvel that my heart still beats.

I have no will to weep or sing,
No least desire to pray or curse;
The loss of love is a terrible thing;
They lie who say that death is worse.

Paedantic Basterd · 04-13-2011, 01:14 AM

Duga's post is the most worthwhile one in the thread. There's nothing in it I disagree with.

View Poll Results: Is it better to have loved and lost, than to have never loved at all?
Yes	25	44.64%
No	10	17.86%
Who cares?	7	12.50%
anal beads	14	25.00%
Voters: 56. You may not vote on this poll

04-12-2011, 03:51 PM	#32 (permalink)
s_k Music Addict Join Date: Nov 2010 Location: The Netherlands Posts: 2,206	Yes. But I wouldn't have said yes after I had just broken up with my girlfriend. At that time anything would have been better... __________________ Click here to see my collection

04-12-2011, 04:37 PM	#34 (permalink)
duga MB quadrant's JM Vincent Join Date: Dec 2009 Location: Washington, DC Posts: 3,762	I feel heartbreak is something everyone should experience. It really teaches you a lot about yourself. Whether or not you think love is real, heartbreak sure as hell is. It's the result of having something that used to be constant and reliable in your life ripped away all of the sudden. That's when people get desperate and that's when you see how low you can really go. As for me, however, I'm still feeling the repercussions of being in love once. I'm over the girl...I'm not even attracted to her in the slightest anymore. However, I am now incredibly guarded when I meet new people. I've dated around but it wasn't until just recently that I met someone with real potential. I didn't expect this, but that potential scares the **** out of me. Now I have this conflict in my head where on one side I want to be around her all the time...on the other side, I don't want to get stomped on again. Human emotions are fragile things. We evolved them to help us survive (you love the things that help you live...thus being monogamous and being able to pump out a constant supply of offspring; you hate the things that hurt you etc etc). This came into conflict when we evolved self awareness and a higher intelligence. Those logical thoughts find a hard time interpreting the primal and irrational emotions we have. That's is why love is such a big topic for all of us. Is it real? Is it necessary? No one will ever know. __________________ Confusion will be my epitaph...

04-12-2011, 05:34 PM	#35 (permalink)
s_k Music Addict Join Date: Nov 2010 Location: The Netherlands Posts: 2,206	Mmmm, you're very right when you say heartbreak teaches you a lot about yourself. I can honestly say I've become a better person since me and my ex broke up after 6 years. I can't say I'm over her. She's not really over me either. I guess we'll never be. But we are over the sadness. __________________ Click here to see my collection

04-12-2011, 08:29 PM	#38 (permalink)
Janszoon Mate, Spawn & Die Join Date: May 2007 Location: The Rapping Community Posts: 24,593	Nice, but I still say it's more like the "I've laid lots of times" scene I posted. __________________ A Night in the Life of the Invisible Man Time & Place 25 Albums You Should Hear Before the Moon Crashes into the Earth and We All Die last.fm

04-12-2011, 03:38 PM	#31 (permalink)
crukster Music Addict Join Date: Dec 2010 Posts: 181	you can't love and lose imo. It transcends time, space, physical parameters. Love is eternal. When you really love someone and they love you, that's a feeling you never lose, even if you're apart, indefinitely. But if you're asking, is it better to think you were in love and lose it, than to never think it, then I'd say no. I.e. is it better to be very close to someone and then have them leave or to never be close, well, imo it's better to have reality and realise that people come and go, even ones you care about a lot. Just enjoy things while they last. But actual love, you can't lose that. That probably doesn't make much sense, reading it back. @Occulthawk, I'm gonna call bull** man, no way you love every girl you've boned. Maybe I'm wrong, I'm not psychic, but I don't think you'd talk crudely about sex if it was true. You can't call it love when you meet some girl in a nightclub and ragg her brains out. It's awesome, fair dues, but it's not love, dude. Saying "I love every Woman I've had sex with" only really counts for anything if you like marriede your "childhood sweetheart" or some **, it's a bit of a bare faced lie to just say "I love every girl I get in the sack" If you ask me. Fair enough we've all probably said it to get some action, but let's be honest here man, you honestly telling us that's true?

04-12-2011, 08:26 PM	#37 (permalink)
~~Sansa Stark~~ Account Disabled Join Date: Dec 2009 Location: The Eyrie, Vale of Arryn, Westeros Posts: 3,234	more like

04-13-2011, 01:14 AM	#40 (permalink)
Paedantic Basterd Music Addict Join Date: Sep 2010 Posts: 5,184	Duga's post is the most worthwhile one in the thread. There's nothing in it I disagree with.