Is It Better To Have Loved, And Lost? Than To Have Never Loved At All?

duga · 07-05-2011, 08:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Conan

I could see that. Unfortunately for me, I find there's a difference between what I'm passionate about and what I'm in love with. I sort of have a near constant passion for art (music and film in particular) but I can't get enough out of it to really satisfy my emotional need. I will attest to simply dropping projects and other pursuits when I fall in love with somebody, however. So maybe I am using art as something to bounce back to.

Ah, see you described exactly how I feel. There is a very big difference between being IN love and loving. I have, in fact, been in love with someone that I ended up not loving. I think the term "in love" should actually have it's own word...using the word love in that context gets confusing.

What you seem to want is balls to the wall emotional overload. That may be a very "loving" act, but it is not love itself. That will most definitely fade...no matter what. True love is being scared enough about losing the person you are with after that spark fades that you will still do anything for them (as long as we are talking about relationships...).

~~Farfisa~~ · 07-05-2011, 08:32 PM

Well, I suppose it's better to have loved and lost as it would make you a more understanding person in many ways. It's just losing someone you love almost makes that feel worthless sometimes.

Neapolitan · 07-05-2011, 08:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Conan

Life is nothing but love, and love is nothing but heartbreak.

I like this saying, it is pithy but profound, cynical but not whiny.

Howard the Duck · 07-05-2011, 10:37 PM

love is the air that feeds the ego - New Order

djchameleon · 07-06-2011, 04:41 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by duga

This is true, but I definitely take comfort in knowing I will find love again even if it is something totally unrelated to what you are currently losing. I find I alternate between love in people and love in music. When I'm in a new relationship (a good one) I throw all my passion into it. When that fades, I find my passion in music again. I always have something.

I may be misinterpreting this but you aren't one of those types that gets into a new relationship then neglect other ones are you? friends and family and concentrate solely on the new person in your life.

I had a friend like that but I couldn't be bothered to stay friends with her any longer. Every time she got a new bf, she wouldn't completely shut out everyone then when the new relationship starts to fall apart or she gets dump or dumps him then she wants to just waltz back into people's lives.

Howard the Duck · 07-06-2011, 04:43 AM

the other thing having a steady does for me is no more hunting around for the next prey

~~Farfisa~~ · 07-06-2011, 04:47 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Il Duce

the other thing having a steady does for me is no more hunting around for the next prey

I hate hunting for chicks, I'm horrible at it.

Howard the Duck · 07-06-2011, 04:48 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by loose_lips_sink_ships

I hate hunting for chicks, I'm horrible at it.

i've become steadily more observant and more chick-based in my talk than previously so no problemo

djchameleon · 07-06-2011, 04:49 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by loose_lips_sink_ships

I hate hunting for chicks, I'm horrible at it.

then stop hunting, it'll be pretty natural when you find someone that fits what you are looking for and it won't be as difficult as hunting

duga · 07-06-2011, 08:51 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by djchameleon

I may be misinterpreting this but you aren't one of those types that gets into a new relationship then neglect other ones are you? friends and family and concentrate solely on the new person in your life.

I had a friend like that but I couldn't be bothered to stay friends with her any longer. Every time she got a new bf, she wouldn't completely shut out everyone then when the new relationship starts to fall apart or she gets dump or dumps him then she wants to just waltz back into people's lives.

Nah, that's not what I meant. I still make time for the other important people in my life.

View Poll Results: Is it better to have loved and lost, than to have never loved at all?
Yes	25	44.64%
No	10	17.86%
Who cares?	7	12.50%
anal beads	14	25.00%
Voters: 56. You may not vote on this poll

07-05-2011, 08:32 PM	#102 (permalink)
~~Farfisa~~ Account Disabled Join Date: Feb 2008 Posts: 2,773	Well, I suppose it's better to have loved and lost as it would make you a more understanding person in many ways. It's just losing someone you love almost makes that feel worthless sometimes.