Awkward social situations
 

Regale me with tales of awkward social situations you've encountered or seen.
We've had had them...

When you're home alone and you see the window cleaner
Calling a teacher mum
When women speak without permission etc.

I may or may not be bored.

I soooooooooooo hate calling teachers mum.
This one time me and my mates were having a joke around and I went to say "Do you want a punch in the kisser?" and I tripped up and said "Do you want a kiss in the puncher?"

Saying hello in the super market to someone you know and then constantly meeting them again for the next 4 fuckin' aisles!!!

You actually used the phrase "Do you want a punch in the kisser?" so I'm glad it went up in smoke.

Accidently spitting when you talk or someone doing it to. You both know what happened, yet neither of you says anything.

Also, the supermarket... bumping into someone you know. You have a talk for 5-10 minutes and then part ways... just to bump into each other in the next isle. Awkward.

EDIT: Right-Track :mad:

Twat!

I met this guy in a nightclub I went to school with.

Or at least he said I did, I could not remember him whatsoever. He spent the next HOUR telling me who he was & what he'd been up to since school.

I still had no idea who he was afterwards.

This. Anytime at the store I'll see someone I'm cool with but haven't really seen in awhile... and we'll be make the usual small talk, "hey how ya been man," "You still in school, you workin, hows the girl treatin ya?" Then i'll be like... Alright, peace man take it easy. Then I'll see him a few more times and every time you see that person it just gets more awkward. It's like....should i say anything else to this dude or just pretend he isnt there

The lift silence!
Being in a lift with a complete stranger.
Or, you'll be talking to someone you know but soon as you get in the lift - conversation dries up.

I'll raise you...


Bitching about someone as they enter the room.

Ever waiting for a phone call then it finally comes and the person is a call centre and you assume it's just the person messing around and say something like "Alright ****face, you aren't funny". Then it actually is a real call centre :|

Everytime my mother in law kisses me on the cheek in public.
If we meet in the street she'll kiss me on the cheek as a greeting and again when we part.
Usually when I'm with a friend.
I literally have to fight the instinctive urge not to head butt her as she leans in.
Instead I have to smile through gritted teeth.
Very Awkward!

I see your bitching about someone as they enter the room

And I raise you the waiting for the change in the shop even though you've paid the exact money.

And don't even get me started on the having a piss in the urinals. So uncomfortable. I try and go for the cubical, but if there's someone already in there then nothing says "I have a small willy" like a que for the cubical so you're forced to stand next to another man while you have a wee. :(

ZOMG yes. I do this all the time, I cannot pee with people watching.
What about the classic dodge somebody in a doorway and then they also dodge then everytime you move they move and it goes on for like 30 seconds.

That's just a pain in the arse, I find myself wanting to rugby tackle them.
Cunts. Get out my way.
I don't find it particularly awkward.

The awkwardness when a woman doesnt choose the iron in a game of monopoly however... Lulz.

How about when you are having a conversation mishear someone then have to ask what for the third time?

I dunno what's worse - THAT, or what happened to me the other day.

Massive business meeting, I was at the door meeting and greeting and mingling as you do - and I was shaking everyone's hands as they entered etc.
So, this girl turns up and I had met her once before and got on reasonably well - but I decided to go for the professional hand shake
She however, she went in for the kiss on the cheek.
And then I made some weird noise like "uh-ot-oh" as I repositioned for the kiss on the cheek. So awkward.

LMAO.
Somebody on Facebook liked something that said:
"The awkwardness when Osama Bin Laden asks for the time and it's 9:11"
I was Rofl.

I'd rather tell Osama Bin Laden the time than when it's my birthday and someone says "happy birthday!" and you say "thanks, you too"

Or when you get a take away delivered and the guy delivering it says "enjoy your meal." and you say "cheers, you too"

So cringeworthy.

I thought of a couple.

The other day I was in class and me and my friend started discussing Belle And Sebastian. The teacher asks what we're talking about and my friend tells him. So he asks if their new album is any good and she replies, he then asks what kinda music we both like, I can't even muster an answer in front of a class of neds so I just kinda muster an "all sorts".

I was auditioning for the role of The Lion in the school play and the teacher counted me in to start singing. I try to sing but i'm so nervous I just kinda make a bark sound and ask to start over.

When you're watching TV/a movie with your parents and a raunchy sex scene comes on.

When you get paired with someone with a mutual hatred in class.

Ah, I've encountered this a few times. That's why I never watch movies when my parents are around :D

My mother is ****ing needy, I have to watch movies with her all the time.

The awkwardness when somebody asks if you like a band you hate and you have to awkwardly say "not really".

Be a man and take a piss at the urinal.

-Seeing an ex in public
-Worse yet, being with new girl and seeing ex in public (bonus awkward points if a conversation is started)
-Being with your girl and seeing HER ex in public (extreme bonus points awarded for conversation between those two)


Also, when somebody who speaks broken English keeps asking you something and you can't understand them. I worked at a shoe place and Oriental Asians would come in all the time and I could never understand what they were saying. Same goes for parents of friends that are Indian or Asian.

You're too nice or you're not very confrontational.
I'll tell them what an abomination of a band they are and get into arguments.
Unless I just can't be arsed and there isn't a point.
I try and avoid speaking to Kiss/Guns N Roses/Bon Jovi fans at all costs.

I used to do this, I got into a 48 comment argument on Facebook over Green Day. But all my friends called me a pretentious ******* and said they'd fall out with me if I carried on.

*Offtopic

James jesus christ get new friends, yours suck, and you take things too personally

I got into a heated discussion with my friend over the fact she likes the fucking Wombats.

The only band we have in common is Brand new, so we tend to talk about how great Jesse Lacey is because I go fucking mental if we talk about bands she likes.

:(

My friend's parents always make me go with them to hockey games because they don't like just going with only their daughter. It's time consuming, but I deal with it.

And since I failed the third grade, I'm still in middle school, and the musical intelligence levels were dangerously low. They always asked my opinion on Never Shout Never, and I'd have to manage enough courage to say "I don't like them".

Here are a few situations:
-Spilling tea on your shirt, without a spare one, and having to explain to everybody that you said "It's a tea stain" and that you never said "It's a pee stain".

-dealing with people who have no idea how to use computers over the phone

-Having your friend willingly listen to your MP3 player only to have him/her frown in disgrace that it isn't normal, generic rock everybody else listens to

Riding the ski lift with strangers can be awkward.

And I'm surprised no one has said this yet... farting during silence?

And I'm surprised no-one's said having to dump someone yet.

Also, I was getting a drink at some bar or other, and you know how the odd fella you come across has weird eyes that look like they're slightly crosseyed or something? The fella at the bar had that whole thing going. I kept turning my head thinking he was looking over my shoulder when he was asking me what I wanted to drink, 'til he actually pointed to his eyes and said 'right here'.

Was hearing a song by French band Noir Desir, when my teacher hears it, and asks me:

You know that Bertrand Cantat (the leader of the band) killed a very good friend of mine ?

It took me some very long minutes to get my head together, and change the music, while giving him some sympathetic smile.

^Thread winner.

Holy ****.


It's always awkward when you say "I love you" on the phone to someone who isn't a family member/other person you'd say "I love you" to. Especially because you never realize until you've hung up, and then it's just awkward to call back.

hurr durr, I said that to my science partner and he totally got the wrong message :laughing:

when you're on the bus/train listening to music through your ear/headphones and someone you may or not know talks to you and you completely don't acknowledge it and try and look in the opposite direction so as not to make eye contact. GO AWAY, I AM LISTENING TO MUSIC AND I DON'T WANT TO HEAR YOUR SHIT VOICE.

when someone says something which is just totally wrong and you don't want to correct them in fear of the huge tumbleweed that will inevitably come barging through the room. like the other day this guy i work with saying "i hate queens of the stone age, have just never really liked dave grohl". i was nearly dying in my chair wanting to correct him but people were around and i didn't want to.

when you think out loud and people hear you, or you think of something funny and start laughing when you're on your own. i do this far too often for my own good.

when you're walking along and a bit of the pavement is sticking up out of the ground and you kick it and stumble and people see. i just look to the ground and start laughing or get my phone out and pretend to/actually text someone.

also i can vouch for the peeing in the urinals thing as well. i always go for the cubicles, i can be absolutely busting for a piss but when i get to the urinals it just wont come out AT ALL. when we saw pixies a few months ago i was absolutely dying for a wee, ran to the toilet and it was packed and i was waiting at the cubicle and a guy behind me was like "go on theres a urinal free" and i was a bit drunk and shouted "NO THANKS I'M A NERVOUS PISSER HAAAAAAAAAAAAAA" and there was just utter silence. i actually wanted to dive down the toilet and never be seen again.

The third time I have to ask someone to repeat themselves and still do not understand what they said.

I finally resort to smiling and a half laugh until I realize they were asking me a question.

I always correct people, I find their stupidity annoying.
People disliking something out of ignorance like that, I just have to be the smug little know it all and I don't care if it's awkward.
My sister said could of, and I just said "have."
And my mum today, she said they suffered from annorexic
Straight away, "anorexia."
And she was like "yeah, anorexia... anyway...."

I can't help it. You should have started an argument with that utter utter twat. :D

oh man yeah i hate that. my friend has a really really strong geordie accent and i pretty much just say yes, no and nod my head to everything she says. especially when shes drunk she might as well be speaking a foreign language to me.

i just can't. i dunno why, i think it's because i got my head kicked in when i was in school for pulling someone up on their misspelling of "chicken" haha. so maybe it's put me off correcting people forever.

:laughing:

Telephone conversations are the worst. Because normally you can halfway read a persons lips but on the phone your at the mercy of its signal.