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Old 11-27-2010, 01:32 AM   #161 (permalink)
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Was at a 7-11 a while back in a weird part of town at around 1:00 AM when a van full of midgets/little people arrived, two of whom had noticeable physical deformities (other than being unusually short of course). They then preceded to buy a bunch of porn while talking about oral sex in an intentionally overt manner. I was the only other person in the store and was forced to wait behind them while they made their purchases.
Ah man. You gotta watch out for that! Man thats awesome.
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Old 11-27-2010, 01:45 AM   #162 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by zachsd View Post
Was at a 7-11 a while back in a weird part of town at around 1:00 AM when a van full of midgets/little people arrived, two of whom had noticeable physical deformities (other than being unusually short of course). They then preceded to buy a bunch of porn while talking about oral sex in an intentionally overt manner. I was the only other person in the store and was forced to wait behind them while they made their purchases.
Sounds like a scene from a Harmony Korine movie. But awesome story anyways, haha.
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Old 11-27-2010, 11:27 AM   #163 (permalink)
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I had one a couple of days ago, I had just come home from school for the day and saw that the dishwasher lid was down and a few dishes were missing (it had been used the other night) but none of the other dishes had been put away. I launched into a scathing vitriol about the laziness of the person who opened the dishwasher, heard it go click but didn't bother to finish the job only to hear my mother say "excuse me?" She was in the dining room adjacent to the kitchen and heard every word I said. She had gotten a few dishes out for lunch and was going to go back and get the rest and I got to feel like a jackass for the rest of the day.
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Old 11-27-2010, 12:20 PM   #164 (permalink)
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I had one a couple of days ago, I had just come home from school for the day and saw that the dishwasher lid was down and a few dishes were missing (it had been used the other night) but none of the other dishes had been put away. I launched into a scathing vitriol about the laziness of the person who opened the dishwasher, heard it go click but didn't bother to finish the job only to hear my mother say "excuse me?" She was in the dining room adjacent to the kitchen and heard every word I said. She had gotten a few dishes out for lunch and was going to go back and get the rest and I got to feel like a jackass for the rest of the day.
Ah dude, you suck!

I hate it when you have dinner with your friends familiy or people you don't know. First, if the food tastes like ****, you can't tell them so, and for some reason it's always silent. You try to make conversation, but they answer with simple replies. It suckzz.
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Old 11-27-2010, 01:17 PM   #165 (permalink)
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Ah dude, you suck!

I hate it when you have dinner with your friends familiy or people you don't know. First, if the food tastes like ****, you can't tell them so, and for some reason it's always silent. You try to make conversation, but they answer with simple replies. It suckzz.
You know, I don't think I've ever found that, unless I start talking about maths :P
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Old 11-27-2010, 07:04 PM   #166 (permalink)
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my worst one ever:

Out for a mates b-day, we leave the club, I'm justifiably sloshed, having consumed 13 pints of cider and a couple shots.

Girl comes up to me and starts fishing for compliments, she says something about thinking she's fat.

What I intend to say: "Eh, chill out, you're obviously not, don't worry about it"

What I actually said: "Eh, being fat is the least of your problems"

Woops. Cue 20 seconds of silence before my brain catches up with my mouth, and I say "I'm very sorry, I think I've just said the exact opposite of what I meant to say"
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Old 11-27-2010, 07:52 PM   #167 (permalink)
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my worst one ever:

Out for a mates b-day, we leave the club, I'm justifiably sloshed, having consumed 13 pints of cider and a couple shots.

Girl comes up to me and starts fishing for compliments, she says something about thinking she's fat.

What I intend to say: "Eh, chill out, you're obviously not, don't worry about it"

What I actually said: "Eh, being fat is the least of your problems"

Woops. Cue 20 seconds of silence before my brain catches up with my mouth, and I say "I'm very sorry, I think I've just said the exact opposite of what I meant to say"
Classic.
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Old 12-01-2010, 10:03 AM   #168 (permalink)
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accidentally touching a random mans bulge is way up there
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i havent i refuse to in fact. it triggers my ptsd from yrs ago when i thought my ex's anal beads were those edible candy necklaces
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Keep it in your pants scottie.
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Old 12-01-2010, 08:07 PM   #169 (permalink)
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I myself wouldn't think much of it. Why is that so awkward?

With me that would probably go like
'oops, sorry
'that's allright'
And business will be continued as usual.
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Old 12-02-2010, 11:16 AM   #170 (permalink)
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the awkward look when you both try to ignore the fact you just fully grabbed his penis... no?
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i havent i refuse to in fact. it triggers my ptsd from yrs ago when i thought my ex's anal beads were those edible candy necklaces
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Originally Posted by Dr. Rez View Post
Keep it in your pants scottie.
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