The Confessional Thread

Oriphiel · 03-07-2015, 05:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Vanilla

KI you need to grow some balls and treat your lady right.

I don't want to start another argument, and I really do understand where you're coming from, but... damn, that's kinda harsh on Ki. I mean, it's not like any of us really know what's going on in their relationship. Feel free to ignore this, it's just my two cents...

**Scarlett O'Hara** · 03-07-2015, 05:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ki

Complete double standard right here, and the only reason i'm responding is because you mentioned my name. First of all, why should I have to man up when i'm trying to keep personal issues and forum issues separated. Her and I don't have issues together, we have a few fights here and there, and I admit that it's usually my fault, due to first off, never having a relationship in my life, and secondly, anger issues from how I grew up. Not blaming my parents or family life, I blame myself for being unable to control it. However, I don't feel like I need to justify myself when I say that I'd rather not have my relationship issues on the internet for the whole world to see. Secondly, I don't need advice, i've surrounded myself with good people in my life, and the last place i'd look for relationship advice is on an internet forum where I come to relax and get away from real life. I'm not saying I can't come to you guys, but her "outburst" was random and it shocked me that she'd even think to put it here instead of talking to me about it first. Yeah, she went here before going to me (granted I was pissed and was unapproachable). I've been talking to her today and she even admitted that it wasn't the right thing to do to come to the forum before coming to me. So, you can think of that any way you want. I'm not going to be looked at as the bad guy when all I want is to keep our personal issues anywhere but within our own lives.

You misread what I said, you need to grows some balls and talk to her in private about her issues. I am not saying you should discuss it publicly at all. You don't need advice, maybe, but she does! Why do you think she is crying out for help?

Key · 03-07-2015, 05:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Vanilla

You misread what I said, you need to grows some balls and talk to her in private about her issues. I am not saying you should discuss it publicly at all. You don't need advice, maybe, but she does! Why do you think she is crying out for help?

I mentioned that I did talk to her today and I told her that it wasn't fair to bring it to the forum, which she agreed to. I just don't see how the "grow some balls" comment is necessary. It makes your post sound like it's coming from a bad place, which I know it's not, you're just trying to help.

**Scarlett O'Hara** · 03-07-2015, 05:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ki

I mentioned that I did talk to her today and I told her that it wasn't fair to bring it to the forum, which she agreed to. I just don't see how the "grow some balls" comment is necessary. It makes your post sound like it's coming from a bad place, which I know it's not, you're just trying to help.

I get quite passionate about this kind of thing. You may think she doesn't need help but many times she has spoken on the forum about her self confidence issues. Does this mean she can't even talk about that now on MB?

Key · 03-07-2015, 05:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Vanilla

I get quite passionate about this kind of thing. You may think she doesn't need help but many times she has spoken on the forum about her self confidence issues. Does this mean she can't even talk about that now on MB?

Just keep in mind that I do counter argue her every time she says that she thinks she's unattractive or unapproachable. I do the best I can. I really don't want to say much more than what I have in case I start to get into my personal life again. But like I said, I know your concern / commentary is coming from a good place, I just know that the way I do things is the best thing I can do.

She can talk about it all she wants on the forum but her original post was directed at me, which is unfair to me when she didn't even approach me.

**Scarlett O'Hara** · 03-07-2015, 05:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ki

Just keep in mind that I do counter argue her every time she says that she thinks she's unattractive or unapproachable. I do the best I can. I really don't want to say much more than what I have in case I start to get into my personal life again. But like I said, I know your concern / commentary is coming from a good place, I just know that the way I do things is the best thing I can do.

She can talk about it all she wants on the forum but her original post was directed at me, which is unfair to me when she didn't even approach me.

Okay but you kind of made her out to be "bad' for posting personal relationship stuff on MB. If I were you, I would have said to her "babe, do you mind if we not discuss this stuff on the forum, I can talk to your about it privately now/later. I would be gentle with her because she is a little vulnerable right now. It sounds like she needs a girlfriend like me to be there to talk to.

~~Cuthbert~~ · 03-07-2015, 05:44 PM

Can't believe this stuff is being discussed on a public forum. Speak to each other.

Quote:

I honestly wish I had a terminal illness.

Key · 03-07-2015, 05:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Vanilla

Okay but you kind of made her out to be "bad' for posting personal relationship stuff on MB. If I were you, I would have said to her "babe, do you mind if we not discuss this stuff on the forum, I can talk to your about it privately now/later. I would be gentle with her because she is a little vulnerable right now. It sounds like she needs a girlfriend like me to be there to talk to.

That's not it at all. I just have a personal preference to not having relationship issues on a music forum that we are on together. It's not only bad for us personally, but it's bad for the people who have to read the potential drama that results from it. I didn't respond to it because I texted her when I saw it saying it wasn't appropriate / I didn't like that she did it. If however i'm wrong for doing that, so be it. It's my personal preference to keep personal issues away from the forum. If it's something about her and not a relationship issue, I don't mind if she posts it. But I just felt it was unnecessary to drag me into it when it wasn't the forums responsibility to deal with it.

**Scarlett O'Hara** · 03-07-2015, 05:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by monkeytennis

Can't believe this stuff is being discussed on a public forum. Speak to each other.

Dude is that necessary? Did you read that we have completely established that? There was no need to rip into both of them again.

Blarobbarg · 03-07-2015, 05:45 PM

Can we all just agree that none of us has any idea what their personal life is like and we can respect them and let them work it out? If we want to have private discussions, we can keep it to PMs. That's what they're for. If we want to support members or encourage them, feel free to do so, as long as it's not personal attacks.

But that's just my opinion, which doesn't really matter in the long run, so y'all just do what you want.

03-07-2015, 05:45 PM	#2710 (permalink)
Blarobbarg Do good. Join Date: Feb 2011 Location: Minneapolis, Minnesota Posts: 2,065	Can we all just agree that none of us has any idea what their personal life is like and we can respect them and let them work it out? If we want to have private discussions, we can keep it to PMs. That's what they're for. If we want to support members or encourage them, feel free to do so, as long as it's not personal attacks. But that's just my opinion, which doesn't really matter in the long run, so y'all just do what you want. __________________ https://rateyourmusic.com/~Blarobbarg ｡･::･ﾟ★,｡･::･ﾟ☆　^my RYM^　｡･::･ﾟ★,｡･::･ﾟ☆ (◠‿◠✿)