Romance

Guybrush · 06-15-2010, 03:12 PM

Hey guys. Sorry for starting such a mushy thread, but ..

I'm away from my GF at the moment and I'm thinking when we're together again, I'll do something real romantic .. if I can think of something! I'm sure this goes for many guys, but my girlfriend has complained a few times that I'm simply not romantic. Although I make the occasional effort, my mind is just not normally wired that way while to her, it seems to come more natural.

Anyways, I thought instead of me asking people to help me come up with something romantic (which is a bit pathetic), I thought I could perhaps just ask you guys (and definetly you girls) what you think is romantic. Like did someone ever do anything nice for you or did you do something for anyone else? Did someone you know propose to their partner in some magnificent way? Do you have some romantic fantasy that you'd like to live out for real? Save the juicy bits for the sex thread though!

Maybe I and other slightly romantically retarded people can get some helpful tips to make us better boyfriends/girlfriends or husbands/wives now or in the future

jibber · 06-15-2010, 04:19 PM

A friend of mine was doing the long distance thing for about five months, and she'd told him that she would be back home around November. She then got in touch with her boyfriend's mom, all his close friends, and arranged to actually be back a month earlier than she'd said. Her boyfriend's mom met her at the airport, stashed all her stuff, and then drove her to his house while he was at work. When he came home she was hanging out in his living room watching TV. He freaked out and said it was the best surprise he'd ever had. Of course something like that only works if you're in a very serious relationship.

Another friend wanted to do something really special for his fiancee's birthday. While she was away for a full day at work he rented one of those helium tanks to fill up balloons and blew up well over 1000 of them and filled her apartment. He then hid among all the balloons so she had to find him and her present. She loved it, but I think a big part of that was because he cleaned it all up afterwards as well.

Mojo · 06-15-2010, 04:57 PM

Everyones idea of romance is a little different i guess. I like to think that romance comes naturally to me and that i dont have to force it and im perfectly happy to be that way. Really though, i havent actually done that many romantic things myself.

For me, the best romantic gestures are something personal to whomever you are with and may not even appear so romantic to an outsider. I like to stay clear of things i consider to be too cliche or over the top to the point of it being vomit-worthy. For these kind of gestures i think they only work if its so over the top that its made clear to your partner that you yourself know how over the top it is yet you're prepared to do it anyway, even if it makes you feel embarrassed or like a bit of an idiot.

I had once agreed to send a girl a compilation and she was going to do the same for me. It wasnt really initially intended to be a romantic gesture, more just the sharing of a common interest we both had in music. I decided to make her a tape for her 18th birthday in which i chose a song from each year she had been alive. I never actually got to give her it but for me, thats a nice thing to do as it takes a long time to do it and its clear how much thought has gone into it and yet it is quite simple.

I also have some favourite places that mean alot to me, that are quite peaceful or visually quite beautiful and as far as im concerned taking someone to one of these places where you can be alone and also share this place with the other person is just as romantic as doing something over the top like blowing up 1000 baloons and putting them in some girls house. (Sorry, i didnt like that one. The other story was good though.)

I just think the best romantic gestures should be simple but show that you have put alot of thought into sharing something that is important to you with another person or something that shows how well you know them and what it is they enjoy and is important to them.

**Scarlett O'Hara** · 06-16-2010, 04:05 AM

Well, tore. My romantic moment was when my ex bought me a pair of diamente earrings and left it at the door, texting me to come outside. It was lovely. But I'm not fussy because I don't often get spoiled. My friend's boyfriend sent her presents to her house via a taxi such as flowers, chocolates and anything pink really. I'm not sure what your girlfriend would be into however, my final suggestion is that you a) think outside the box, b) be original, c) make her feel like a woman, and d) tell her how you feel about her.

That my friend, is romance. My additional idea is that you take her to a place you find peaceful/beautiful/of signifance.

Guybrush · 06-16-2010, 04:34 AM

Thanks guys for your brilliant input!

Quote:

Originally Posted by jibber

A friend of mine was doing the long distance thing for about five months, and she'd told him that she would be back home around November. She then got in touch with her boyfriend's mom, all his close friends, and arranged to actually be back a month earlier than she'd said. Her boyfriend's mom met her at the airport, stashed all her stuff, and then drove her to his house while he was at work. When he came home she was hanging out in his living room watching TV. He freaked out and said it was the best surprise he'd ever had. Of course something like that only works if you're in a very serious relationship.

Another friend wanted to do something really special for his fiancee's birthday. While she was away for a full day at work he rented one of those helium tanks to fill up balloons and blew up well over 1000 of them and filled her apartment. He then hid among all the balloons so she had to find him and her present. She loved it, but I think a big part of that was because he cleaned it all up afterwards as well.

I really like the coming home early bit

I know how much one can miss someone. You could flip it around as well. I'm also doing the distance thing and if my GF made an unnanounced visit, wow! That would've been something.

Quote:

Originally Posted by mojopinuk

Everyones idea of romance is a little different i guess. I like to think that romance comes naturally to me and that i dont have to force it and im perfectly happy to be that way. Really though, i havent actually done that many romantic things myself.

For me, the best romantic gestures are something personal to whomever you are with and may not even appear so romantic to an outsider. I like to stay clear of things i consider to be too cliche or over the top to the point of it being vomit-worthy. For these kind of gestures i think they only work if its so over the top that its made clear to your partner that you yourself know how over the top it is yet you're prepared to do it anyway, even if it makes you feel embarrassed or like a bit of an idiot.

I had once agreed to send a girl a compilation and she was going to do the same for me. It wasnt really initially intended to be a romantic gesture, more just the sharing of a common interest we both had in music. I decided to make her a tape for her 18th birthday in which i chose a song from each year she had been alive. I never actually got to give her it but for me, thats a nice thing to do as it takes a long time to do it and its clear how much thought has gone into it and yet it is quite simple.

I also have some favourite places that mean alot to me, that are quite peaceful or visually quite beautiful and as far as im concerned taking someone to one of these places where you can be alone and also share this place with the other person is just as romantic as doing something over the top like blowing up 1000 baloons and putting them in some girls house. (Sorry, i didnt like that one. The other story was good though.)

I just think the best romantic gestures should be simple but show that you have put alot of thought into sharing something that is important to you with another person or something that shows how well you know them and what it is they enjoy and is important to them.

I think I'm quit good at the little things you mention, like good with words and expressing my feelings and hopes for the future and so on. It's more the extravagant stuff I'm not so good at. I've done some of the more sober things you mention though, particularly taking someone to locations that mean a lot to you. I have a hundred of these little places that I used to love as a kid dispersed along the south coast of Norway. We don't live down there, so these are places we visit in the summer. For example there's a valley where I used to chase sheep and it meets this fjord which often turns emerald green in the summer months .. it's pretty secluded too, so a brilliant place to go, ehr, nude dipping on a warm day.

Last year, I took my GF to a place I've often gone freediving. I picked her oysters

I didn't think of it as a romantic gesture then, but maybe it was.

Your mixtape idea was pretty neat. I'm gonna try and remember that one.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Vanilla

Well, tore. My romantic moment was when my ex bought me a pair of diamente earrings and left it at the door, texting me to come outside. It was lovely. But I'm not fussy because I don't often get spoiled. My friend's boyfriend sent her presents to her house via a taxi such as flowers, chocolates and anything pink really. I'm not sure what your girlfriend would be into however, my final suggestion is that you a) think outside the box, b) be original, c) make her feel like a woman, and d) tell her how you feel about her.

That my friend, is romance. My additional idea is that you take her to a place you find peaceful/beautiful/of signifance.

I'm terrible at getting fits, really. I'm not very good at surprising her. I do it rarely .. They had flowers on sale a little while ago, humhum, so then I felt I could buy and surprise her with a bouquet if that's how you spell it. Of course I have bought her flowers, but it's usually been on special days when she was probably expecting a surprise anyways.

Definetly room for improvement in that apartment!

KatsumeNyaa · 06-16-2010, 02:06 PM

I wish I could help but my boyfriends response is always 'I'm not making enough money to be romantic right now'

He does nip off to pick the most beautiful flowers I have ever seen during the middle of the night for me. My vases are always full of the most exotic and varied flowers ever. I think that is romantic...to be woken up at 4am to a bunch of really great flowers. Also a nice home cooked meal when you least expect it is always sweet.... and sleeping outside in the tent with some (securely done) candle light is amazing as well.

The most romantic things in life are really free.

Mojo · 06-16-2010, 03:55 PM

Why do you need to have money to be romantic?

crushedblind · 06-16-2010, 05:09 PM

catch

just play catch!!!!!!!!!!!

Quote:

Originally Posted by tore

For example there's a valley where I used to chase sheep and it meets this fjord which often turns emerald green in the summer months .. it's pretty secluded too, so a brilliant place to go, ehr, nude dipping on a warm day.

Thrice · 06-16-2010, 05:24 PM

I've been compared to Romeo. Ha! My most recent romantic experience was when I was supposed to meet up with a gal about a month ago for dinner. We aren't really dating, but have had our own fling when were both single. I took off from work a bit early, and got to her casa before she did. I talked to her sister before hand about the idea and she helped me out with it. I cooked up some Salmon with Butternut squash puree, and some nice but time consuming side dishes. Took the leafs off the kitchen table to make it a bit smaller for two. Set the table nice and tied it together with a nice bong vase I got for her. When she pulled in I cut the lights and played Everlong on the acoustic with just candles lighting the room. It seems a bit cliche, but ladies love that stuff because however much cliche it is, they always respond with 'no one has ever done anything like that for me before' If this doesn't get you laid before dinner, you should move on.

Now that I'm in a pretty serious gig, the old lady gets off to me surprise cleaning the house or something along those lines. I planted her a garden in the spring, and bought her pink gardening gear, she loved that idea as well. The typical romance is pretty played out in our relationship, and yes I'm a cheater.

Freebase Dali · 06-16-2010, 08:22 PM

I hate to comment in here without adding anything of real value, but Tore... don't feel bad about not being fluent in romance. I'm the same way... I generally feel like typical romance is sometimes so cliche' that it's too embarrassing to even think about going through with. But I think it's important to realize that the guy's (or gal's, if she's the one taking the initiative) idea of romance is of absolutely no importance at all. The person who's idea of romance you should be paying attention to is the person you're trying to romance.
Forget the typical cliche' stuff. What does SHE like? What makes HER smile? What moves HER? If you're fortunate, she's the kind of girl that makes those questions easily answerable. If not, then you gotta do some digging. But the digging should happen in her yard, and no one else's.
You can hear a million examples of how someone made someone else happy with romance, but I think the best move you can make is to simply go out of your way to really find out what makes her heart skip a beat and do YOUR best to make it happen. It doesn't take roses and candles to do that. If a girl cares, she's going to notice the effort you put into it and it will be romantic even if it turns out to be the dorkiest, most un-aesthetic thing ever.
The romance lies in the effort that's made for the other person. If it takes an ego hit to realize you may be no suave Cassanova but still tried your best, you've done just as well.

06-15-2010, 03:12 PM	#1 (permalink)
Guybrush Juicious Maximus III Join Date: Nov 2008 Location: Scabb Island Posts: 6,525	Romance Hey guys. Sorry for starting such a mushy thread, but .. I'm away from my GF at the moment and I'm thinking when we're together again, I'll do something real romantic .. if I can think of something! I'm sure this goes for many guys, but my girlfriend has complained a few times that I'm simply not romantic. Although I make the occasional effort, my mind is just not normally wired that way while to her, it seems to come more natural. Anyways, I thought instead of me asking people to help me come up with something romantic (which is a bit pathetic), I thought I could perhaps just ask you guys (and definetly you girls) what you think is romantic. Like did someone ever do anything nice for you or did you do something for anyone else? Did someone you know propose to their partner in some magnificent way? Do you have some romantic fantasy that you'd like to live out for real? Save the juicy bits for the sex thread though! Maybe I and other slightly romantically retarded people can get some helpful tips to make us better boyfriends/girlfriends or husbands/wives now or in the future __________________ Something Completely Different

06-15-2010, 04:19 PM	#2 (permalink)
jibber Freeskier Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: Istanbul was Constantinople now it's Istanbul not Constantinople... Posts: 1,536	A friend of mine was doing the long distance thing for about five months, and she'd told him that she would be back home around November. She then got in touch with her boyfriend's mom, all his close friends, and arranged to actually be back a month earlier than she'd said. Her boyfriend's mom met her at the airport, stashed all her stuff, and then drove her to his house while he was at work. When he came home she was hanging out in his living room watching TV. He freaked out and said it was the best surprise he'd ever had. Of course something like that only works if you're in a very serious relationship. Another friend wanted to do something really special for his fiancee's birthday. While she was away for a full day at work he rented one of those helium tanks to fill up balloons and blew up well over 1000 of them and filled her apartment. He then hid among all the balloons so she had to find him and her present. She loved it, but I think a big part of that was because he cleaned it all up afterwards as well. __________________ What you've done becomes the judge of what you're going to do -- especially in other people's minds. When you're traveling, you are what you are right there and then. People don't have your past to hold against you. No yesterdays on the road. William Least Heat Moon, Blue Highways Your toughest competitor lives in your head. Some days his name is fear, or pain, or gravity. Stomp his ass. HOOKED ON THE WHITE POWDER

06-15-2010, 04:57 PM	#3 (permalink)
Mojo Melancholia Eternally Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: England Posts: 5,018	Everyones idea of romance is a little different i guess. I like to think that romance comes naturally to me and that i dont have to force it and im perfectly happy to be that way. Really though, i havent actually done that many romantic things myself. For me, the best romantic gestures are something personal to whomever you are with and may not even appear so romantic to an outsider. I like to stay clear of things i consider to be too cliche or over the top to the point of it being vomit-worthy. For these kind of gestures i think they only work if its so over the top that its made clear to your partner that you yourself know how over the top it is yet you're prepared to do it anyway, even if it makes you feel embarrassed or like a bit of an idiot. I had once agreed to send a girl a compilation and she was going to do the same for me. It wasnt really initially intended to be a romantic gesture, more just the sharing of a common interest we both had in music. I decided to make her a tape for her 18th birthday in which i chose a song from each year she had been alive. I never actually got to give her it but for me, thats a nice thing to do as it takes a long time to do it and its clear how much thought has gone into it and yet it is quite simple. I also have some favourite places that mean alot to me, that are quite peaceful or visually quite beautiful and as far as im concerned taking someone to one of these places where you can be alone and also share this place with the other person is just as romantic as doing something over the top like blowing up 1000 baloons and putting them in some girls house. (Sorry, i didnt like that one. The other story was good though.) I just think the best romantic gestures should be simple but show that you have put alot of thought into sharing something that is important to you with another person or something that shows how well you know them and what it is they enjoy and is important to them. __________________ Last.FM \| Echoes and Dust

06-16-2010, 04:05 AM	#4 (permalink)
Scarlett O'Hara Make it so Join Date: Oct 2005 Posts: 6,181	Well, tore. My romantic moment was when my ex bought me a pair of diamente earrings and left it at the door, texting me to come outside. It was lovely. But I'm not fussy because I don't often get spoiled. My friend's boyfriend sent her presents to her house via a taxi such as flowers, chocolates and anything pink really. I'm not sure what your girlfriend would be into however, my final suggestion is that you a) think outside the box, b) be original, c) make her feel like a woman, and d) tell her how you feel about her. That my friend, is romance. My additional idea is that you take her to a place you find peaceful/beautiful/of signifance. __________________ "Elph is truly an enfant terrible of the forum, bless and curse him" - Marie, Queen of Thots

06-16-2010, 03:55 PM	#7 (permalink)
Mojo Melancholia Eternally Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: England Posts: 5,018	Why do you need to have money to be romantic? __________________ Last.FM \| Echoes and Dust

06-16-2010, 02:06 PM	#6 (permalink)
KatsumeNyaa Groupie Join Date: Jun 2010 Location: somewhere on earth Posts: 15	I wish I could help but my boyfriends response is always 'I'm not making enough money to be romantic right now' He does nip off to pick the most beautiful flowers I have ever seen during the middle of the night for me. My vases are always full of the most exotic and varied flowers ever. I think that is romantic...to be woken up at 4am to a bunch of really great flowers. Also a nice home cooked meal when you least expect it is always sweet.... and sleeping outside in the tent with some (securely done) candle light is amazing as well. The most romantic things in life are really free.

06-16-2010, 05:24 PM	#9 (permalink)
Thrice أمهاتك[وهور]Aura Euphoria Join Date: Dec 2003 Location: Florida/Buffalo/CT Posts: 2,077	I've been compared to Romeo. Ha! My most recent romantic experience was when I was supposed to meet up with a gal about a month ago for dinner. We aren't really dating, but have had our own fling when were both single. I took off from work a bit early, and got to her casa before she did. I talked to her sister before hand about the idea and she helped me out with it. I cooked up some Salmon with Butternut squash puree, and some nice but time consuming side dishes. Took the leafs off the kitchen table to make it a bit smaller for two. Set the table nice and tied it together with a nice bong vase I got for her. When she pulled in I cut the lights and played Everlong on the acoustic with just candles lighting the room. It seems a bit cliche, but ladies love that stuff because however much cliche it is, they always respond with 'no one has ever done anything like that for me before' If this doesn't get you laid before dinner, you should move on. Now that I'm in a pretty serious gig, the old lady gets off to me surprise cleaning the house or something along those lines. I planted her a garden in the spring, and bought her pink gardening gear, she loved that idea as well. The typical romance is pretty played out in our relationship, and yes I'm a cheater. __________________ Lew Harrison, who looked like an anarchist with his red eyes and fierce black beard, had been writing furiously in one corner of the room. "That's good—happiness by the kilowatt," he said. "Buy your happiness the way you buy light."

06-16-2010, 08:22 PM	#10 (permalink)
Freebase Dali Partying on the inside Join Date: Mar 2009 Posts: 5,584	I hate to comment in here without adding anything of real value, but Tore... don't feel bad about not being fluent in romance. I'm the same way... I generally feel like typical romance is sometimes so cliche' that it's too embarrassing to even think about going through with. But I think it's important to realize that the guy's (or gal's, if she's the one taking the initiative) idea of romance is of absolutely no importance at all. The person who's idea of romance you should be paying attention to is the person you're trying to romance. Forget the typical cliche' stuff. What does SHE like? What makes HER smile? What moves HER? If you're fortunate, she's the kind of girl that makes those questions easily answerable. If not, then you gotta do some digging. But the digging should happen in her yard, and no one else's. You can hear a million examples of how someone made someone else happy with romance, but I think the best move you can make is to simply go out of your way to really find out what makes her heart skip a beat and do YOUR best to make it happen. It doesn't take roses and candles to do that. If a girl cares, she's going to notice the effort you put into it and it will be romantic even if it turns out to be the dorkiest, most un-aesthetic thing ever. The romance lies in the effort that's made for the other person. If it takes an ego hit to realize you may be no suave Cassanova but still tried your best, you've done just as well.