Bum bandit just sounds gay!
At least use arse bandit if you're handing out verbal abuse advice.

...or bottom jockey!

I like the alliteration of Bum Bandit. Arse bandit is just poor verbal abuse, you may as well not bother.

Bottom jockey isn't too bad, bit too American for my liking.

Bum bandit poofter is the strongest verbal abuse IMHHO.

^ That would be shit stabber.

As in;

"Oi you there! Yer shit stabbin', turd burgling suasage jockey!"

I like it, I mean it has a lot of depth but don't you think it comes across as trying too hard? You want to verbally abuse them but in an effortless manner. If they sense you spent time constructing the insults they won't hit them as hard.

I always thought it was a pretty good swear to call your girl a woman...
But it really depends on the emphasis, and whether you're telling her to make a sandwich or not.

Quickly followed by a swift slap to the ass.

Oh I forgot poop-d*ck.

I suppose it's more funny when you have a friend thats had an anal sex mishap, and that becomes his nickname.

Well excuse me, but isn't this the Foul Mouthed Bastards thread?

Eloquence is not a pre requisite.

If it was, then this would be the Expletive Uttering's For Those Of Dubious Parentage thread.

Would it not?

Not exactly a curse, but I refer to people as Douche or Douchebag or Dbag about 40 times a day.