Music Banter - Am I the only one who finds this hilarious?

Music Banter (https://www.musicbanter.com/)

- The Lounge (https://www.musicbanter.com/lounge/)

- - Am I the only one who finds this hilarious? (https://www.musicbanter.com/lounge/48505-am-i-only-one-who-finds-hilarious.html)

Am I the only one who finds this hilarious?

So, I stumbled upon this site E-mails from an ******* where this guy replies to random adds and makes fun of people who gave the adds. I was reading this one and couldn't stop laughing, but when I showed it to my friends, they thought that it isn't funny at all... Anyway, here it is:

Quote:

Original ad:
I am a 18 year old looking for a summer job. it is hard for me to find work and I just want a job so I can afford a car for college next summer. I can clean, babysit, answer phones, pretty much whatever as long as it pays!!

From Mike Anderson to ***********@***********.org
Hey,

I saw your ad looking for work and I think I have a job for you! I am looking for an assistant on my farm for the summer. It will involve working outdoors. Let me know if you are interested.

Mike

From Stephanie ******* to Me
Hi Mike! I am interested in your job! I love animals and used to ride horses so a farm would be great! what kind of work would I be doing, and where is your farm located? it needs to be close to ******** so my parents can drop me off and pick meup

From Mike Anderson to Stephanie *********
Stephanie,

It is very close to **********. I'm glad to hear you are familiar with horses, because you will be primarily working with horses.

My farm gets all the old horses that other farms don't need anymore, and they are starting to take up a lot of room in my stable, which I want to turn into a garage for my new truck. Therefore, the horses need to go. As my assistant, you will be in charge of killing the horses and dumping them in the lake behind my farm.

I used to have a captive bolt pistol (cattle gun) that I used to put them down, but it broke when I tried to use it to tap a keg. You'll probably have to use my 12-gauge shotgun to put them down. Sometimes they don't die right away when you shoot them, and will start freaking out. You just have to stay calm and keep shooting. Don't worry, I'll show you how to use the shotgun if you aren't familiar with one.

You then need to use my chainsaw to cut the horses into smaller parts that you can carry down to the lake. It can get a little messy, so I suggest wearing some clothes that you don't care about, or some clothes that the horse blood would compliment.

The lake isn't mine, it is my neighbor's. He gets kind of angry when he sees me dumping dead horses in his lake, so you have to make sure he isn't around when you do it. I have some cinderblocks you can use to weigh the horses down so he won't see them.

I have a lot of horses, and each horse takes about an hour and a half to dispose of, so you should have plenty of work. The job will pay $15 an hour. When can you start?

Mike

From Stephanie ******* to Me
omg that is HORRIBLE! That is truely awful and sick!! Why cant you just give the poor horses away? sorry but I am not helping you slaughter horses!!!

From Mike Anderson to Stephanie *********
Stephanie,

I'm sorry if you are a bit surprised, but this is how farms work. You can't give away old horses, you have to kill them. I thought about it, and if you don't want to use the chainsaw to cut up the horses, you can just use my truck to drag them down to the lake. Do you have your license or permit? If not, this could be good driving practice for you. You don't want to pass up on this great job opportunity.

Mike

From Stephanie ******* to Me
No that is not how farms work you are just SICK! I am NOT interested

From Mike Anderson to Stephanie *********
Stephanie you are going to regret this some day when you try to get a real job. I think this would look great on your resume.

:rofl::rofl:

I didn't find it funny at all, he want to cut up old horses, that is just plain mean and gross, what he should had done was sell them to a glue factory at least he would had been reincompenskated for the horses, I think his plan is not only cruelity to animals, I think his plan is shear foolishness, he is loosing money.

Well, he didn't ACTUALLY want to kill and cut the horses, that is the point. He's just making things up at spot, if she said that she liked dolphins, he would probably say that she would be in charge of slaughtering dolphins or something. He is just making fun of people, some see right through it, but some think that he is being serious, and that is when the fun starts.

I knew this was a joke. I still did not find it funny at all. Honestly, I find it funny that you found it so funny.

I have never read anything funnier than this. I can't allow myself to read it anymore, because I just can't stop laughing...

Scissorman, I love that site. I stumbledupon it at school last semester and read every one. Hilarious.
I like the one about the car blinker fluid and also the disguised weapons one.

some of those emails are hilarious. others are obviously trying to hard.

the shotgun in the tissue box had me in tears though.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Scissorman (Post 843597)

Well, he didn't ACTUALLY want to kill and cut the horses, that is the point. He's just making things up at spot, if she said that she liked dolphins, he would probably say that she would be in charge of slaughtering dolphins or something. He is just making fun of people, some see right through it, but some think that he is being serious, and that is when the fun starts.

But I never heard of farm dolphin, they might have them in Serbia, but not here. I think if Stephanie said she used to ride a dolphin on a farm, Mike Anderson would be highly suspicious of her. I think Mike would get mad that he is being played, maybe write an angry e-mail to her, or something.

Quote:

Originally Posted by neapolitan (Post 843739)

but i never heard of farm dolphin, they might have them in serbia, but not here. I think if stephanie said she used to ride a dolphin on a farm, mike anderson would be highly suspicious of her. I think mike would get mad that he is being played, maybe write an angry e-mail to her, or something.

qft

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dr.Seussicide (Post 843744)

qft

Legendary, isn't he?

omg that was hilarious. i didn't think it could get worse but then all of a sudden there is a chainsaw. haha.

While I was reading that I was just wondering. What the f*** is wrong with people these days. Well, at least he admitted that he was wrong for doing it, but then again how he could he defend himself.

Quote:

Originally Posted by xEMGx (Post 843830)

While I was reading that I was just wondering. What the f*** is wrong with people these days. Well, at least he admitted that he was wrong for doing it, but then again how he could he defend himself.

Come again?

Just go to the damn site and read.
E-mails from an *******

I feel like someone posted something else from that site.
I love that he always makes the e-mail sound serious and professional.

I didnt think that one was particularly very funny but I have read some funny ones in the past.

Quote:

Originally Posted by xEMGx (Post 843830)

While I was reading that I was just wondering. What the f*** is wrong with people these days. Well, at least he admitted that he was wrong for doing it, but then again how he could he defend himself.

Yeah, I totally agree with this xEMGx, and another thing this guy Mike Anderson is a sucka. He knows he can't give away old horses yet for some reason he keeps taking them in from other farms, anyway.

Quote:

Stephanie,

It is very close to **********. I'm glad to hear you are familiar with horses, because you will be primarily working with horses.

My farm gets all the old horses that other farms don't need anymore, and they are starting to take up a lot of room in my stable, which I want to turn into a garage for my new truck.

Quote:

Stephanie,

I'm sorry if you are a bit surprised, but this is how farms work. You can't give away old horses, you have to kill them.

a little bit of irony there, Mike Anderson, don't you think

Anyone want to post a facepalm on his behalf?

That was hillarious!! I don't get the people who don't get it...

Quote:

Originally Posted by xEMGx (Post 843830)

While I was reading that I was just wondering. What the f*** is wrong with people these days. Well, at least he admitted that he was wrong for doing it, but then again how he could he defend himself.

You know it isn't real right? He doesn't really want to chop up horses.

Haha, that was hilarious! :laughing:

Quote:

Originally Posted by Conan (Post 844012)

That was hillarious!! I don't get the people who don't get it...

He doesn't really want to chop up horses.

What 3' 4" tall person wants to operate a 4 foot chainsaw? I think it is blatantly obvious he doesn't really want to chop up horses.

I thought it was moderately funny until the guy tells her that it would look good on her resume, then I :laughing:

there are definatly funnier ones on that site

I tried the site the other day and it said he was arrested and to buy his book if you want to read his stories (I forget the exact words) but today the site is up!? Which leaves me kinda puzzled, did he get arrested?

Did it happen to be April 1st when you checked?

That might answer your question.

I thought it was kind of funny so I checked some more out, and found those way funnier than the one you posted. I actually read the whole site, they were so good.

Yea, a lot of people on the site liked the horse one but I didn't find it the funniest at all. Not that it offended me, because that's pretty hard to do.. but there's some gold in those archives.

The disguised weapons one makes me lose it. That party cup glock cracks me up.

Quote:

Originally Posted by crash_override (Post 845495)

The disguised weapons one makes me lose it. That party cup glock cracks me up.

Hahaha... I love the shotgun too.

The whole article makes me lolz.

Checked the website.
The disguised weaponry, hair salon and carpet ads were genius.

Oh holy ****. I'm sorry for the double post, but I just had to share this one:

From Me to ********@gmail.com
RE: Clydesdale horse needs caring owners:

Hey there!

Your horse looks beautiful! Is he still available?

Michael Murphy
Vice President
Murphy Glue Factory, Inc.

From ********@gmail.com to Me
RE: Clydesdale horse needs caring owners:

HELL NO!!!

Epic win. :rofl: