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05-12-2018, 09:11 PM | #692 (permalink) | |
Ask me how!
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05-12-2018, 09:16 PM | #693 (permalink) | |
Born to be mild
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It doesn't work, man. Not for me. It's actually pretty intensely annoying. Just so you know. I mean, it might have seemed great in your head - hell, maybe it is great and it's just me - but damn it ruined that part of the story for me, cos I'm always aware of doing it myself, and it just, well, it just ...
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05-13-2018, 05:12 AM | #694 (permalink) |
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Can't help but break them rules.
Just imagine her part of the story as some loser in a bar telling you a ridiculous story. Btw, I don't actually come out and say it, but she's also pretty high at the time she's recounting everything. So... yeah.
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05-13-2018, 08:09 PM | #696 (permalink) |
Ask me how!
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Tbh, I'm expecting you find a plot hole or two, 'cause it's one of those stories where I had no idea what I was doing or where I was going with it, and just made shit up on the fly. I was having way too much fun writing it to stop and think about how it would read.
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05-13-2018, 08:50 PM | #697 (permalink) | |
Born to be mild
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05-14-2018, 06:35 PM | #698 (permalink) |
Born to be mild
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Thanks for destroying my dream of ever being a writer!
****ing seriously, get this published, man. I can already see it as a blockbuster movie, as I'm sure you can, and possibly wrote it with that in mind. It's ****ing great. Quite long, almost more a mini-novel maybe, but despite the few niggles I had earlier, not really a bad part in it. Excellent prose, great characters, fantastic interaction ... hell, just perfect. Everyone should read this. I'm so jealous but, you know, ****ing proud as all hell too to have read it before it becomes a fantasy classic and bestseller. 50/10 or more.
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05-14-2018, 08:38 PM | #700 (permalink) | |
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Sort of, yeah. The first thing he'd ever put in the tree was an old home video of him and his mom, and so they both sort of became entangled with it, catalysts for the birthing. By ending the birthing, he prevented both her and a younger, happier, and more innocent version of himself from coming to life. So, in a way, the story actually winds down right where it started; with suicide.
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