What are you Writing now?

Oriphiel · 01-29-2018, 12:03 PM

Autobiographical works are boring.

**Frownland** · 01-29-2018, 12:08 PM

Embers

The rest of the world fell away from the room as everyone awaited for the doctor to announce his decision.

"Midgets with huge tits and fat asses," he declared. Everybody breathed a sigh of relief.

OccultHawk · 01-29-2018, 12:19 PM

The Bad Life by OccultHawk

There once was a man who treated everyone badly and he had a bad life. Another man treated every one well but he also had a bad life. A third man played it down the middle and, you guessed it, he had a bad life, too. So they decided to stand outside and ask passersby. A nice black lady explained that white people have been unhappy since Jim Crow ended. Two weeks later the three men fell prey to the opium crisis. At their funerals people wondered why such educated and privileged white men died so young. A black college professor saw it on TV and told his wife, who was a middle school principal, that white people are having a hard time adjusting to this new situation.

Oriphiel · 01-29-2018, 12:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Frownland

Embers

The rest of the world fell away from the room as everyone awaited for the doctor to announce his decision.

"Midgets with huge tits and fat asses," he declared. Everybody breathed a sigh of relief.

Unable to join in with his family's elated relief, the patient looked down at the tumor on his balls, and then back up at the doctor. "I think I'd like a second opinion."

"Very well," said Dr. Frownland. "I'd be happy to say it again."

Oriphiel · 01-29-2018, 01:08 PM

Ori's One Letter Stories:

F.

R.

O.

W.

N.

L.

A.

N.

D.

Trollheart · 01-29-2018, 01:14 PM

Trollheart's No-Letter Stories (the truest form of abstract expressionism you can get; a real two-fingers to the establishment and a refusal to be pigeon-holed - nobody wants to be forced into a pigeon's hole, let's face it.)

Volume 1 (abridged)

Volume 1 (unabridged)

Volume 1 (on a bridge)

Volume 2 (about a bridge)

Volume 3 (How to play bridge)

Volume 4 coming soon, also The Omnibus Edition, featuring all four volumes plus one that hasn't yet been written. Place your orders now on Amazon.

OccultHawk · 01-29-2018, 01:15 PM

The Hangover by OccultHawk

A man woke up at 6 with a bad hangover. He went to the bathroom and washed down a Xanax, a Vicodin, and an Ambien with a lot of water. He woke up again at 2 feeling great. After drinking some bourbon he checked his messages. He had two. One was work. They bitched. The other was his sister. His mother had died. When he returned to work they gave him a condolences card with some money in it. He stopped by the liquor store on the way home.

rubber soul · 01-29-2018, 01:17 PM

4'33, the Novel...

Oriphiel · 01-29-2018, 01:22 PM

Life by OccultHawk (translated by Ori)

Life is just one big pussy, so fuck it.

OccultHawk · 01-29-2018, 10:38 PM

The Therapist Rapist by OccultHawk

A women went crazy so her mother sent her to a therapist, only she misread the ad and she actually sent her to the rapist.

01-29-2018, 12:03 PM	#531 (permalink)
Oriphiel Ask me how! Join Date: Oct 2014 Location: The States Posts: 5,354	Autobiographical works are boring. __________________ ---------------------- \|---Mic's Albums---\| ---------------------- ----------------------------- \|---Deafbox Industries---\| -----------------------------

01-29-2018, 12:08 PM	#532 (permalink)
Frownland SOPHIE FOREVER Join Date: Aug 2011 Location: East of the Southern North American West Posts: 35,541	Embers The rest of the world fell away from the room as everyone awaited for the doctor to announce his decision. "Midgets with huge tits and fat asses," he declared. Everybody breathed a sigh of relief. __________________ Studies show that when a given norm is changed in the face of the unchanging, the remaining contradictions will parallel the truth. d e a f b o x

01-29-2018, 12:19 PM	#533 (permalink)
OccultHawk one-balled nipple jockey Join Date: Dec 2010 Location: Dirty Souf Biatch Posts: 22,006	The Bad Life by OccultHawk There once was a man who treated everyone badly and he had a bad life. Another man treated every one well but he also had a bad life. A third man played it down the middle and, you guessed it, he had a bad life, too. So they decided to stand outside and ask passersby. A nice black lady explained that white people have been unhappy since Jim Crow ended. Two weeks later the three men fell prey to the opium crisis. At their funerals people wondered why such educated and privileged white men died so young. A black college professor saw it on TV and told his wife, who was a middle school principal, that white people are having a hard time adjusting to this new situation. __________________ 2016 2017 2018 2019 2020 Member of the Year & Journal of the Year Champion Behold the Writing of THE LEGEND: https://www.musicbanter.com/members-...p-lighter.html

01-29-2018, 01:08 PM	#535 (permalink)
Oriphiel Ask me how! Join Date: Oct 2014 Location: The States Posts: 5,354	Ori's One Letter Stories: F. R. O. W. N. L. A. N. D. __________________ ---------------------- \|---Mic's Albums---\| ---------------------- ----------------------------- \|---Deafbox Industries---\| -----------------------------

01-29-2018, 01:14 PM	#536 (permalink)
Trollheart Born to be mild Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: 404 Not Found Posts: 26,992	Trollheart's No-Letter Stories (the truest form of abstract expressionism you can get; a real two-fingers to the establishment and a refusal to be pigeon-holed - nobody wants to be forced into a pigeon's hole, let's face it.) Volume 1 (abridged) Volume 1 (unabridged) Volume 1 (on a bridge) Volume 2 (about a bridge) Volume 3 (How to play bridge) Volume 4 coming soon, also The Omnibus Edition, featuring all four volumes plus one that hasn't yet been written. Place your orders now on Amazon. __________________ Trollheart: Signature-free since April 2018

01-29-2018, 01:15 PM	#537 (permalink)
OccultHawk one-balled nipple jockey Join Date: Dec 2010 Location: Dirty Souf Biatch Posts: 22,006	The Hangover by OccultHawk A man woke up at 6 with a bad hangover. He went to the bathroom and washed down a Xanax, a Vicodin, and an Ambien with a lot of water. He woke up again at 2 feeling great. After drinking some bourbon he checked his messages. He had two. One was work. They bitched. The other was his sister. His mother had died. When he returned to work they gave him a condolences card with some money in it. He stopped by the liquor store on the way home. __________________ 2016 2017 2018 2019 2020 Member of the Year & Journal of the Year Champion Behold the Writing of THE LEGEND: https://www.musicbanter.com/members-...p-lighter.html

01-29-2018, 01:22 PM	#539 (permalink)
Oriphiel Ask me how! Join Date: Oct 2014 Location: The States Posts: 5,354	Life by OccultHawk (translated by Ori) Life is just one big pussy, so fuck it. __________________ ---------------------- \|---Mic's Albums---\| ---------------------- ----------------------------- \|---Deafbox Industries---\| -----------------------------

01-29-2018, 10:38 PM	#540 (permalink)
OccultHawk one-balled nipple jockey Join Date: Dec 2010 Location: Dirty Souf Biatch Posts: 22,006	The Therapist Rapist by OccultHawk A women went crazy so her mother sent her to a therapist, only she misread the ad and she actually sent her to the rapist. __________________ 2016 2017 2018 2019 2020 Member of the Year & Journal of the Year Champion Behold the Writing of THE LEGEND: https://www.musicbanter.com/members-...p-lighter.html