Who didn't? I'd much rather be Black Cat though: I could feel my huge knockers and know about that Spider-Dick.

I was a disturbingly non-perverted kid.
Now? Sure.

Not gonna lie. It took me way too long to imagine what I could do with that Venom tongue. I was so innocent. I could make that Spider-Dick sing like a real flute.

NO; I wanna be Demona. (Or as the cloistered internet teen Otherkin community would say--I'm kin with Demona)

But I don't know, I'm not familiar enough with comic book villains; please tell me which villain I would be, MB (realistically it'd be one of the more inept ones)

This somehow perfectly encapsulates my inner mental state when I am winedrunk at 1 am on a Tuesday night.

I understand, but do you want to be a thousand-year-old misanthrope who's had no meaningful connection with any being for 99.999% of that time?

Poison Ivy. A crazy bitch who entices men both through intent and accident, whose experience with human connection has left her terrified of any relationships but craving that same human connection. Perhaps you might make meaningful connections, but your fear of rejection and your narcissism leads you to treat any real human relationship as a struggle to dominate the other person so that you must inevitably crush the other person's will or kill them if that is not possible.

The only time you will be able to form a meaningful connection with another person is if that person is as damaged as you and has been pre-beaten down by another to the point that you won't have to manipulate them into being your inferior because their basic nature is to seek out those who will treat them as an inferior.

That's the best case scenario. Otherwise you're Harley Quinn, who is the unfortunate mental slave of the second paragraph. Like I said, no one wants to be a Batman villain.

Now I just had to translate the lyrics:

Don't allow your head to work!
Happiness in in an empty skull
It's not good to languish in thoughts -
Jump like a goat, jump like a goat!

Remove with a junk broom
The rubbish of thoughts from your head,
Don't dare to hold back the crutch of desires
With the restraint of learning.

Hang paper streamers on your head
Be exhuberantly young
Drink alcohol! And those retards
With glasses and books - run away from them!

The soul is a chimera, there is no god.
Move, hoof!
Spend life's bleary coin!
Jump like a goat! Jump like a goat!

I mean, my current back-up plan is to become an old goth misanthrope who lives in a yurt alone in the woods so I'm sure I'd manage. I just want to be a gargoyle (pls)

This all sounds about right, so I'll take it.


This is perfect, I love it

You could still just as easily be Harley Quinn. There's a reason the two are BFF's. It's just a question if you are the leader or the follower.

..But mainly a question of which character's costume would look best on me, of course. (Priorities.)