Medical Advice

Urban Hat€monger ? · 05-18-2009, 05:38 PM

I've not seen much evidence to the contrary

pourmeanother · 05-18-2009, 06:13 PM

Well you turned to the right place by asking MB... I actually have a PhD in medical excellence. In my professional medical opinion, I think you should make a burrito and put two tablespoons of curry on it, chase it down with some ipecac. That ought to do the trick.

Or, go see a real doctor.

Thrice · 05-18-2009, 07:56 PM

In all honestly, smoke a bowl real quick. Mans greatest natural remedy, and the second greatest might me aloe vera, try that on your ivy.

LoathsomePete · 05-18-2009, 08:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Thrice

In all honestly, smoke a bowl real quick. Mans greatest natural remedy, and the second greatest might me aloe vera, try that on your ivy.

``Yeah, it's a cure-all. My buddy Jonah broke his elbow one time. He just smoked some weed. It still clicks, but it's cool. ``

-Ben Stone (Knocked Up)

Sorry I just thought of that line after I read it.

Seriously it might actually calm down your stomach and the munchies will force you to eat, or at least to try and keep down some food.

sleepy jack · 05-19-2009, 02:32 AM

If you rub crisco (or some sort of shortening) over the poison ivy rash area lay out in the sun (or maybe under a very hot heater, or standing in front of an oven cooking at about 450 degrees if it's not sunny) it'll clear up after awhile of exposing the shortening to heat.

Guybrush · 05-19-2009, 02:48 AM

Urine might also help you with your rash. Just pee on yourself or if the rash is somewhere your pee can't reliably reach, just empty yourself in a container and then apply the pee with a paintbrush.

SATCHMO · 05-19-2009, 04:38 AM

Buy some ginger root, mince it, and steep it in a non-caffeinated herbal tea like Chamomille or mint. The ginger is anti viral and will abate the vomitting and diarreah if you have either of those. The chamomille and mint will both help relieve your nausea. Gatorade or pedialite are both good to replace the electrolytes your losing through dehydration.

Edit: Tore's right about the urine. It also works for athlete's foot.

~~coryallen2~~ · 05-19-2009, 07:34 AM

I've been told that bleach will cure it up. With a bleach to water ratio of 1:5.

sleepy jack · 05-19-2009, 08:37 PM

Yeah you should definitely try that.

jackhammer · 05-20-2009, 09:02 AM

You had a bad stomach but drank crappy carbonated drinks? That stuff is bad enough when you are feeling fine but those sort of things are probably the worst thing to drink.

Really gentle on the stomach and replaces lost fluids. No caffeine either.

05-18-2009, 05:38 PM	#11 (permalink)
Urban Hat€monger ? The Sexual Intellectual Join Date: Dec 2004 Location: Somewhere cooler than you Posts: 18,605	I've not seen much evidence to the contrary __________________ Urb's RYM Stuff Most people sell their soul to the devil, but the devil sells his soul to Nick Cave.

05-18-2009, 06:13 PM	#12 (permalink)
pourmeanother Saaaad Panda Join Date: Dec 2008 Posts: 852	Well you turned to the right place by asking MB... I actually have a PhD in medical excellence. In my professional medical opinion, I think you should make a burrito and put two tablespoons of curry on it, chase it down with some ipecac. That ought to do the trick. Or, go see a real doctor. __________________ Life is just blah, blah, blah You hope for blah And sometimes you find it, but mostly it's blah And waiting for blah And hoping you were right about the blahs you made And then, just when you think you've got the whole blah'd damn thing figured out And you're surrounded by the ones you blah Death shows up... anddd blah, blah, blah.

05-18-2009, 07:56 PM	#13 (permalink)
Thrice أمهاتك[وهور]Aura Euphoria Join Date: Dec 2003 Location: Florida/Buffalo/CT Posts: 2,077	In all honestly, smoke a bowl real quick. Mans greatest natural remedy, and the second greatest might me aloe vera, try that on your ivy. __________________ Lew Harrison, who looked like an anarchist with his red eyes and fierce black beard, had been writing furiously in one corner of the room. "That's good—happiness by the kilowatt," he said. "Buy your happiness the way you buy light."

05-19-2009, 02:48 AM	#16 (permalink)
Guybrush Juicious Maximus III Join Date: Nov 2008 Location: Scabb Island Posts: 6,525	Urine might also help you with your rash. Just pee on yourself or if the rash is somewhere your pee can't reliably reach, just empty yourself in a container and then apply the pee with a paintbrush. __________________ Something Completely Different

05-20-2009, 09:02 AM	#20 (permalink)
jackhammer Ba and Be. Join Date: May 2007 Location: This Is England Posts: 17,331	You had a bad stomach but drank crappy carbonated drinks? That stuff is bad enough when you are feeling fine but those sort of things are probably the worst thing to drink. Really gentle on the stomach and replaces lost fluids. No caffeine either. __________________ It be my music and film collection. “A cynic by experience, a romantic by inclination and now a hero by necessity.”

05-19-2009, 04:38 AM	#17 (permalink)
SATCHMO Al Dente Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: Texas Posts: 4,708	Buy some ginger root, mince it, and steep it in a non-caffeinated herbal tea like Chamomille or mint. The ginger is anti viral and will abate the vomitting and diarreah if you have either of those. The chamomille and mint will both help relieve your nausea. Gatorade or pedialite are both good to replace the electrolytes your losing through dehydration. Edit: Tore's right about the urine. It also works for athlete's foot.

05-19-2009, 07:34 AM	#18 (permalink)
~~coryallen2~~ Account Disabled Join Date: Feb 2009 Location: lorain,ohio Posts: 909	I've been told that bleach will cure it up. With a bleach to water ratio of 1:5.