I've not seen much evidence to the contrary

Well you turned to the right place by asking MB... I actually have a PhD in medical excellence. In my professional medical opinion, I think you should make a burrito and put two tablespoons of curry on it, chase it down with some ipecac. That ought to do the trick.

Or, go see a real doctor.

In all honestly, smoke a bowl real quick. Mans greatest natural remedy, and the second greatest might me aloe vera, try that on your ivy.

``Yeah, it's a cure-all. My buddy Jonah broke his elbow one time. He just smoked some weed. It still clicks, but it's cool. ``

-Ben Stone (Knocked Up)

Sorry I just thought of that line after I read it.

Seriously it might actually calm down your stomach and the munchies will force you to eat, or at least to try and keep down some food.

If you rub crisco (or some sort of shortening) over the poison ivy rash area lay out in the sun (or maybe under a very hot heater, or standing in front of an oven cooking at about 450 degrees if it's not sunny) it'll clear up after awhile of exposing the shortening to heat.

Urine might also help you with your rash. Just pee on yourself or if the rash is somewhere your pee can't reliably reach, just empty yourself in a container and then apply the pee with a paintbrush.

Buy some ginger root, mince it, and steep it in a non-caffeinated herbal tea like Chamomille or mint. The ginger is anti viral and will abate the vomitting and diarreah if you have either of those. The chamomille and mint will both help relieve your nausea. Gatorade or pedialite are both good to replace the electrolytes your losing through dehydration.

Edit: Tore's right about the urine. It also works for athlete's foot.

I've been told that bleach will cure it up. With a bleach to water ratio of 1:5.

Yeah you should definitely try that.

You had a bad stomach but drank crappy carbonated drinks? That stuff is bad enough when you are feeling fine but those sort of things are probably the worst thing to drink.

http://www.goodnessdirect.co.uk/detail/777567b.jpg

Really gentle on the stomach and replaces lost fluids. No caffeine either.