The Sexual Experience Thread

Paul Smeenus · 10-17-2013, 04:12 PM

*edited to add: I'm already ruined

djchameleon · 10-17-2013, 04:26 PM

While listening to that all I was hearing is that more women need to work on their kegels so they can do the whole death grip when they *** to help me get off.

Ladies, contract your muscles and strengthen thing.

The Batlord · 10-17-2013, 04:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by djchameleon

Yeah, that's pretty much it. What a shitty side effect of daily masturbation.

You could try a softer grip. It's counter-intuitive I know, but it actually works perfectly well.

Anyone else with some turkey jerky advice?

Paul Smeenus · 10-17-2013, 04:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by The Batlord

Anyone else with some turkey jerky advice?

Dan Savage vid above

djchameleon · 10-17-2013, 04:29 PM

I don't even feel like my grip is usually that hard. I ONLY masturbate with lube. The type of lube varies though. If I end up running out of silicone lube then I resort to lotion which is so meh compared to the silicone stuff but it works until I can get more silicone lube.

The Batlord · 10-17-2013, 04:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by djchameleon

I don't even feel like my grip is usually that hard. I ONLY masturbate with lube. The type of lube varies though. If I end up running out of silicone lube then I resort to lotion which is so meh compared to the silicone stuff but it works until I can get more silicone lube.

I guess I'm lucky then. I was never circumcised, so I don't need any lube. I need some if I'm gonna reverse the grip though. Takes a hell of a lot longer, but it's got a big payoff if you know what I mean.

djchameleon · 10-17-2013, 04:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by The Batlord

I guess I'm lucky then. I was never circumcised, so I don't need any lube. I need some if I'm gonna reverse the grip though. Takes a hell of a lot longer, but it's got a big payoff if you know what I mean.

that could be another part of the issue too the fact that I'm circumcised.

The Batlord · 10-17-2013, 04:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by djchameleon

that could be another part of the issue too the fact that I'm circumcised.

For some reason I always thought circumcision was more of a white thing. Either way it sucks to get your dick chopped. Could be worse though, you could be an Orthodox Jew and have some old guy suck the blood out of your penis wound. Proud tradition or not, the whole Mohel thing is gross.

FRED HALE SR. · 10-17-2013, 04:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by The Batlord

You could try a softer grip. It's counter-intuitive I know, but it actually works perfectly well.

Anyone else with some turkey jerky advice?

I'd say get a girlfriend. Its way better masturbating when its someone elses hand roping you and massaging your balls.

The Batlord · 10-17-2013, 04:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by FRED HALE SR.

I'd say get a girlfriend. Its way better masturbating when its someone elses hand roping you and massaging your balls.

What a brilliant ****ing idea! Why the crap didn't I think of that?!