He was just being nice to you because he wanted a handjob.

Those damn Americans and their weird, wacky spellings!

Really? I have their autobiography, and he doesn't come off as nearly as big a douche as Vince Neil or especially Tommy Lee, but I just assumed they're all kinda jerks. Especially when you read about how they acted in the eighties. That's nice to hear though.

Don't tell me that you actually read Tommy Lee's autobiography.

No, The Dirt. The whole band's autobiography. It's a pretty epic story of rock 'n' roll decadence. Who knows how much of it is true (I certainly don't believe Nikki's tale of accidentally summoning evil spirits while reading the Necronomicon), but it's wildly entertaining. If, by the end, the band aren't your heroes just a little bit, then you suck.

I was actually very surprised how cool he was. Duff Mckagan was an incredible ******* though. I was getting his autograph for a friend and he was the complete opposite of Sixx. Coolest guy at the show was Johnny Vatos, go Boingo.

You should get the point. I love some nice juicy BOOTY. BOOTY is fun. I have a lot of experiences with BOOTYLICIOUS GIRLS.

Your language is offensive.

How is it offensive honey?

I had no idea Franco.