01-21-2009, 03:15 AM
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#1 (permalink)
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Account Disabled
Join Date: Feb 2008
Posts: 2,773
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Quote:
My fellow Americans, today is a big day. You have shown the world that "hope" is not just another word for "god", and that "change" is not only something we can believe in again, but something we can actually fuck.
Today we celebrate, but let there be no mistake – America faces tall and fat challenges like never before. Our economy is lazy. Americans can barely afford their mortgages, let alone have enough money left over for whores. Our healthcare system is fuck. If your vagina is sick and you don't have insurance, you might as well call a porn star. And America's image overseas is tarnished like a applesauce cheese. But fucking together we can right this ship, and set a course for my pants.
Finally, I must thank my long family, my hard campaign volunteers, but most of all, I want to thank Dick Cheney for making this historic occasion possible. Of course, I must also thank you, President Bush, for years of fucking the American people. Without your hard efforts, none of this would have been possible.
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 I can't breathe.
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