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View Poll Results: Hey. Did you just grab my ass?
Yes... 30 34.48%
From where I'm standing that is a physical impossibility 26 29.89%
Sh...Should I? 31 35.63%
Voters: 87. You may not vote on this poll

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Old 06-03-2011, 11:50 AM   #8511 (permalink)
From beyooond the graaave
 
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I get a phone call from my sister's friend.
"Annie, come outside and help us."
"With what?"
"....we're not going to tell you, just come outside and walk down the road a little."
"....okay."
I went outside and heard them yelling my name. They're holding shovels. What the hell, I think. Are they digging something up? I get closer and the friend is balancing a dead raccoon on the shovel and my sister is holding a trash bag.
"What the fuck are you doing?!?!??"
I let out a stream of profanities and they giggle, oblivious to my disgust and confusion.
"I thought'd it be funny to put on my ex boyfriend's lawn." my sister says.
"Come help us, we don't want to touch it." says my sister's friend.
I look at the raccoon....thing. No tire marks running across it, that rules out one cause of death. It's face had a terrible expression on it and blood was dripping out of its mouth onto the lily white sidewalk, tainting it. It was probably freshly dead too, it didn't have any flies buzzing around it. I noticed its hands, open, clenching something that wasn't there. My sister's friend moves the shovel closer towards me as if she is going to poke me with it. I yelp. I touched a corpse once but it was embalmed, clean, dry, human. It felt like plastic, fake, like it had been cleaned up and glossed over for me. The ugliness of it was hidden for the sake of my well being. Roadkill isn't like that, especially when its so close to you. This is real. This is mortality. This is disgusting. All of my feelings turn to anger.
"I want no I%^()#U%#(_&U(_@#&%_(#^%_@#^ part of this you crazy )^*$@)^*@^)*ing )^*$)^*@)+^*$)+@*%^)@#+^*+)$*^)$*^+@#)@%)!*@%!+!" I say and leave them on the side of the road to laugh hysterically with the....thing.
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Originally Posted by boo boo
A whole bunch of stupid sh*t that I regret

Last edited by Queen Boo; 06-03-2011 at 11:58 AM.
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Old 06-03-2011, 06:27 PM   #8512 (permalink)
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Are you saying the little sociopaths killed the raccoon themselves?
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Old 06-04-2011, 10:16 PM   #8513 (permalink)
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Dillinger S. Colt doesn't bitch about things. Dillinger S. Colt lets his bullets do the bitchin. While Dillinger S. Colt is shooting them at your cranium.
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Old 06-06-2011, 12:10 PM   #8514 (permalink)
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First day of 5th year today. It sucked ass. Know none of the people in my classes and our change of areas at lunch failed because my friends are really unreliable and some pricks stole our table!
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Old 06-06-2011, 12:26 PM   #8515 (permalink)
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I ****ing hate Orianthi.

Also - I hate that I've been up since 5AM driving people all around the city and surrounding cities. I have to leave again in half an hour to make three more trips in quick succession. It's times like these that I regret having a driver's license.
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Old 06-06-2011, 12:45 PM   #8516 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ThePhanastasio View Post
I ****ing hate Orianthi.

Also - I hate that I've been up since 5AM driving people all around the city and surrounding cities. I have to leave again in half an hour to make three more trips in quick succession. It's times like these that I regret having a driver's license.
come pick me up. I need a ride somewhere!
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Fame, fortune, power, titties. People say these are the most crucial things in life, but you can have a pocket full o' gold and it doesn't mean sh*t if you don't have someone to share that gold with. Seems simple. Yet it's an important lesson to learn. Even lone wolves run in packs sometimes.


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Originally Posted by RoxyRollah View Post
IMO I don't know jack-**** though so don't listen to me.
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The problem is that most police officers in America are psychopaths.
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You're a terrible dictionary.
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Old 06-06-2011, 03:49 PM   #8517 (permalink)
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So all my cousins and my brother each got a $5,000 inheritance check from my grandmother's estate, but not me. Hmmmm...
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Old 06-06-2011, 03:58 PM   #8518 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by Burning Down View Post
So all my cousins and my brother each got a $5,000 inheritance check from my grandmother's estate, but not me. Hmmmm...
Man, if I had 5 grand I'd go out and get a Fender Jaguar and a fender blues deluxe. Awww man, I'm sorry you didn't get anything.
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Old 06-06-2011, 06:31 PM   #8519 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Burning Down View Post
So all my cousins and my brother each got a $5,000 inheritance check from my grandmother's estate, but not me. Hmmmm...
did your grandmother hate your guts?

how was your relationship with her?
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Fame, fortune, power, titties. People say these are the most crucial things in life, but you can have a pocket full o' gold and it doesn't mean sh*t if you don't have someone to share that gold with. Seems simple. Yet it's an important lesson to learn. Even lone wolves run in packs sometimes.


Quote:
Originally Posted by RoxyRollah View Post
IMO I don't know jack-**** though so don't listen to me.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Franco Pepe Kalle View Post
The problem is that most police officers in America are psychopaths.
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Originally Posted by The Batlord View Post
You're a terrible dictionary.
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Old 06-06-2011, 07:18 PM   #8520 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by djchameleon View Post
did your grandmother hate your guts?

how was your relationship with her?
We had a great relationship. Although I only got to see her like once or twice a year, we talked on the phone nearly every night (like 6 nights out of 7). Even her estranged son and his kids got money ffs, and she had repeatedly said he was a waste of life.
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