The Bitch Box

RoxyRollah · 06-25-2015, 08:27 AM

Umm no!

Burning Down · 06-25-2015, 09:13 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Trollheart

LOL! Probably not intimidating enough.

DwnWthVwls · 06-25-2015, 07:17 PM

TIGERS | The Institute of the Greatly Endangered and Rare Species | Myrtle Beach, South Carolina - Apprenticeship Requirements

Fucking serious? Some of these requirements are just ridiculous.

Quote:

Animal trainers do not need traditional schooling. We do however require certain studies BEFORE you apply. The study of physical and philosophical yoga(join a yoga class or get DVDs and practice physical yoga) and meditation (we recommend Swami Satchidananda or Swami Rama's collected works.). Working at TIGERS will tax you both physically and mentally, one way to lessen you chances for pain is to constantly be working to make yourself stronger. Practicing yoga will do this for you both mentally and physically. The study of martial arts, karate and dance, as well as other physical and mental disciplines can help you with balance and personal power. Remember, the animals you are trying to work with have all of these attributes naturally. You must also read Ishmael, My Ishmael, and The Story of B by Daniel Quinn. Quinn's philosophy will give you a better understanding of our need for conservation and why most current forms are failing.

We will require you to watch several movies BEFORE you apply. The Devil Wears Prada, Miranda Priestly will embody our senior staff in their pursuit of perfection in the care and cleaning of the animals. This is the center of their universe and they will expect it to be yours. Kill Bill 2, the cruel tutelage of Pai Mei the Asian martial arts master is a taste of what we will put you through to train you to risk your life and others if you are ever in control of a potentially dangerous animal. Living Yoga, see why TIGERS and Dr. Antle are part of this film, Living Yoga, The life and teachings of Swami Satchidananda, the movie. Five People You Meet in Heaven, this film will show you how a character can change the world from behind the scenes. What the Bleep Do We Know!?, to show you that there is a better way to look the universe. What a Way to Go, Life at the End of the Empire, a bleak look into what could become into our planet.

**Frownland** · 06-25-2015, 07:21 PM

News story: white tiger trainer with dreadlocks killed during discussion of how Kill Bill Vol. 2 is actually realistic with fellow hippy coworkers

The Batlord · 06-25-2015, 07:54 PM

I can see how karate would help. If a tiger comes at you, just kick it in the ****ing face.

DwnWthVwls · 06-25-2015, 07:57 PM

I mean I get what they are trying to do and all but it's a little over the top cultish and seemingly unprofessional. I'd love to work with animals and wouldn't mind dedicating that much time and energy but don't make me adopt your belief system and interests. There are plenty of physical activities besides yoga that it just as good for your body and provide stress relief.

**Frownland** · 06-25-2015, 07:59 PM

You don't want to work there if their staff is like Miranda anyway. **** those *******s, I haven't even met them and I already don't like them.

The Batlord · 06-25-2015, 08:02 PM

Reminds me of that Eat, Pray, Love garbage. The movie is ****ty enough, but the book just makes you want to punch the protagonist in the face for being such a pretentious, new agey bitch.

DwnWthVwls · 06-25-2015, 08:06 PM

Never saw the movie.

The Batlord · 06-25-2015, 08:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DwnWthVwls

Never saw the movie.

You're not missing much. The pretentious, flakey, new age nonsense from the book, from a boring, middle class woman who desperately wishes that she had some sort of culture, was toned down (for obvious reasons), but it was still boring ****.

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06-25-2015, 07:21 PM	#20004 (permalink)
Frownland SOPHIE FOREVER Join Date: Aug 2011 Location: East of the Southern North American West Posts: 35,541	News story: white tiger trainer with dreadlocks killed during discussion of how Kill Bill Vol. 2 is actually realistic with fellow hippy coworkers __________________ Studies show that when a given norm is changed in the face of the unchanging, the remaining contradictions will parallel the truth. d e a f b o x

06-25-2015, 07:59 PM	#20007 (permalink)
Frownland SOPHIE FOREVER Join Date: Aug 2011 Location: East of the Southern North American West Posts: 35,541	You don't want to work there if their staff is like Miranda anyway. ** those ****s, I haven't even met them and I already don't like them. __________________ Studies show that when a given norm is changed in the face of the unchanging, the remaining contradictions will parallel the truth.* d e a f b o x