ribbons

I’m very sorry for the loss of your friend, BD. To have lost a friend so young and in such an unexpected, shocking way – can’t even begin to imagine how devastated you must feel right now. And as for her parents, well, it’s the nightmare of all nightmares losing a child, and in such a cruel way. My thoughts and prayers are with you during this terrible time.

RoxyRollah

Hey now .I assumed the rest was condolences to bd.

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ribbons

Vanilla, I can only imagine how frustrated you are feeling and your post just goes to show that when one’s health is in peril, EVERYTHING else is affected. I really hope that the surgery on the 25th is successful and you find some much needed relief. Chronic pain is no joke. I don’t mean to pry, but I recall you had shared on the forum that you suffer from a particular disease that I also had when I was much younger. I underwent surgery to arrest that disease and it was largely successful and I experienced a lot of relief from pain afterward. I hope and pray for the same outcome for you.

Plankton

If I win tonights Powerball lottery, I'll send you any funds you might be needing.

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The Batlord

I remember you mentioning the surgery a while back. What are the chances that they will fix your issues? My mother had a serious issue with a disease I can't remember the name of off the top of my head, but there was an artery that was somehow constricting her stomach, making it nearly impossible to eat (she pretty much consisted on a diet of protein shakes and ice cream). All the doctors just wrote her off as anorexic, since it was causing her to lose a drastic amount of weight. This all went on for over year, and she was well under a hundred lbs (about 45 kg) near the end, and dangerously malnourished.

Luckily my grandfather was a surgeon back in the day, so he had a lot of contacts to draw on, and since he was retired he was able to pretty much make it his job to figure out what was wrong with her. He got her appointments with the best doctors and surgeons around the country, and probably saved her life, pretty much single-handedly.

I mention all this because she finally had surgery to fix her issue late last year, and was laid up for about month. So I have feels for the downtime you're about to have, and know what it's like to have to worry about whether a surgery will be successful.

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Pet_Sounds

Vanilla, I know nothing about surgery, but I can offer some advice about math tutoring, as that's my dad's occupation (in addition to freelance journalist and small-time author), mostly Grade 12 and 13 level. A couple of his pupils are from Toronto, which is anywhere from a one to three hour drive, depending on traffic and weather. He charges them for travel. Might be worth looking into for you. Also, I'm no expert in New Zealand currency, but ~$30 an hour seems kinda low for math tutoring.

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Everybody's dying just to get the disease

Trollheart

Jess, I'm really sorry you're in this position. You know I do what I can to help you but my resources are not infinite, and this sounds like it's an ongoing thing that papering over the cracks isn't really going to sort. I don't know how welfare works there but I know I get 204 Euro a week, which is exactly the same as anyone who is on the dole. So I get paid, for being a 24/7 carer, the same as some lazy teenager who spends his time in front of video games and couldn't be bothered to look for work. It's pathetic, is what it is.

I hope things look up for you soon. Don't despair; your friends are always here for you and though it may seem black now you know the sun will eventually come shining through. You just have to hang in there. I hope your surgery isn't too traumatic, and remember I'm always here if you need me.

Sending love your way...
TH

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Trollheart: Signature-free since April 2018

Scarlett O'Hara

It absolutely is. My ability to work and live a normal life is affected big time. The positive thing is that I have my surgery very soon. I have Endometriosis and IBS but Endo is the reason I'm getting surgery. I'm really glad your surgery helped your pain and it is so sweet of you to send love to me for mine. I am keeping a positive outlook and am imagining me having relief from pain, at least for a while. If I can get back to earning money I can put some away so I'm better off if this situation comes around again. So was your disease the same if you don't mind me asking? It's a terrible thing that 1 in 10 women (if not more) have this disease.



You're an angel. I want you to win so you can take your daughter on an expense free trip bb.

Wow Batlord I'm so sorry to hear about what happened to your mother. So many doctors these days are quick to judge on face value. Particularly women who are very underweight, they assume it's anorexia even if the woman says it's not. I have heard many stories of women with endometriosis who were told to harden up and that it's just normal woman pain that they experience during periods, pain that can be so severe they pass out. Doctors also think girls are making it up to get drugs. Or attention.

My flatmate thinks I'm a hypocondriac I'm sure of it. She says my pain is from not covering my legs and pelvis properly in the winter and that the food I eat causes it. Such ****ing rubbish. She expects me to listen to her because she's in her 60's. Age does not equal wiseness. She is not a doctor or a scientist for that matter.

But back to your mother, I'm so glad to hear she is better, did she regain weight? It's a huge amount to lose (thanks for kg), it would be terrible to know that these doctors could have let her die like that.

With my surgery, they will laser off all endometrial cells/scars/abhesions and then it's a matter of seeing what happens afterwards. The disease is currently incurable and the endormetriosis can grow back like a weed. It depends on the woman and the stage of the disease. It's a matter of waiting and seeing. Since this is my second time it's being removed it might give me a bit longer. Especially because I know and trust the gynocological surgeon who is performing the operation. I will have a new mirena put in my cervix too which stops my periods and is meant to reduce the pain output. I appreciate your concern and sharing such a personal story with me.

Thanks for the advice, I think because I'm doing it through a company as a contractor it means I have to pay for it. Unless the company has it covered but in New Zealand that would be unusual. Basically wages in this country are piss poor. Food, petrol, power and water goes up every year (not to mention inflation) but wages have not been adjusted for it. Our prime minister is a US sheep/cock sucker who taxes the poor (currently trying to make tax payers pay for a casino convention centre which will be a place for people to gamble and encourages gambling addictions, which tax payers cover also in helplines and services) and makes the rich more wealthy. He sells our country to immigrants and lets NZers camp and **** everywhere on our beautiful land.

I'm off on a tangent but can you blame me for being mad? I think to start with $30 is okay but after I am back into it for a while I'll be charging far more, especially since my clients are wealthy. If that means doing it self employed then so be it. I plan to build a phone/tablet app while I tutor so I can then get a job doing that.

I know hun, you have been a wonderful support in many ways! What you do is a very important job. You have devoted your life to looking after Karen and I have nothing but respect for you. Having down time should be part of the deal!

Thanks for the love bb.

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ribbons

Yes, Vanilla, I had endometriosis – and had laser laparascopic surgery (just as you are scheduled to have) when I was about 30. As you may know, there could be a connection between your IBS and endometriosis because the scar tissue can attach itself to the bowel and bladder, causing bleeding and inflammation in those areas during menstruation. Extensive scar tissue and cysts were found during my surgery. It was considered fairly advanced – the surgeon was able to laser out most of it. It’s so important to have a skilled surgeon familiar with the nature of this disease. So I’m very glad that you have a surgeon you know and trust. I’ll tell you this: after having terribly painful periods since age 12, it was like a minor miracle after that surgery to know what a relatively normal period was like. Yes, I still had cramping pain, but nowhere near the levels experienced before. That’s the kind of outcome I am hoping for for you (or even better, no pain for you at all! That would be nice for a change, right?).

The Batlord

Well, with that long not being able to eat her stomach basically atrophied, so it's slow going, but she's getting there.

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