C'mon, I've got a migraine. I can't take anything harder than cool jazz.

Yikes. Hope she recovers quickly.

Maybe it's the Kenny G making your brain hurt.

I'm freezing and soaked because my bus was 20 minutes late and weather was fair when I left, so I didn't bring my umbrella.

I need soup and snuggles ASAP.

No man, we're talking Brubeck and Miles.

Would have put on Don McLean, but the tape's messed up and sounds like something Frownland would listen to.

Woke up cranky. When I wake up on the wrong side of the bed, my whole day just seems off. Unfortunately my work productivity wasn't great today but my manager understood.

I love when tapes are messed up. My favourite tape I have is a Beethoven collection that has a warped version of Moonlight Sonata. You know me well.

I ate too much chocolate and I have a headache because I'm dehydrated from the runs last night. I took too much laxative. Luckily it's gone now so I can eat but when I woke up I was whiter than a ghost.

You know what really pisses me off when I'm at work (or anywhere else, for that matter)?

When people are in my goddamn way.

I don't know what it is about people being in my way, but there's almost nothing more irritating when it comes to human behavior.

I say "excuse me, sir/ma'am".

They just stand there.

I change my approach. "I'm just gonna slip past you for a sec."

They sort of move their cart/basket/gigantic ass a little bit. Usually in the wrong direction.

I end up testing the limits of agility just to get around them, then end up apologizing because I feel rude for having almost invaded their space despite the fact that they're too goddamn stupid to mind themselves.

Misunderstood a text message from my boss and showed up to work 6 hours early. Scheduled for noon to close, showed up at 6:30 in the morning after stressing mad about being late. I am a moron. >:|