My best friend isn't talking to me, because I went out with two friends yesterday, who happened to be boys. This, apparently, makes me a 'self centered pig' and a 'slut'. As a result of my antics, she wants to pour some napalm down my throat and set me on fire.

lovin this section so entertaining

Is your friend Catholic? They're all the same - just tell her what her priest gets up to, that'll shut her up.

My 'friend'? No she is a super cool Athiest.

In which case she's insecure, self centred and frigid. She's jealous of your ability to socialise with males and rather than admitting it to the world or heself, she externalises this with by using stereotypical social constructs pushed by girl-power feminists, bandying the term "slut" in a derogatory fashion and ignorant of what has long been a highly respectable profession.

You are so right.

But she's the one with the big tits, she shouldn't be jealous.

One girl I knew had a breast reduction.

She said the worst thing about it was now she had no tits she needed a personality to get attention :laughing:

Well, this girl I'm talking about seems to be pretty perfect in every way :rolleyes:

nobody is perfect.
It's impossible.

Every guy I know thinks she is.