Trollheart

Thanks Jess. 1991, February 7. The big C got her, and she never smoked in her life. Dammit, life's very unfair sometimes... Still, she knew how much she was loved, and she was. Nobody --- nobody --- ever had a bad word to say about her. I wrote a sort of poem about her for I think it was the tenth anniversary or something; found it recently. If I can find some appropriate thread or section I may post it.

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Trollheart: Signature-free since April 2018

Freebase Dali

I take my non-existent hat off in respect, and mutter solemn words of comfort and regard.
Meanwhile, my mom is alive, however she is the kind of person that likes to go into a denial state about her health because she doesn't want to face up to it. She has diabetes (the preventable kind), and really high blood pressure. She's ok with taking meds, but she's ultra-scared of doctors and refuses to get checkups. It worries me because she needs to have someone other than herself looking out for herself, in an informed way.
She has been getting better, and actually consented to getting a full checkup recently, which, to me, is amazing and lifts a pretty big weight... because she's been limping lately when I see her, and I notice she blames it on walking too much or something, which is denial about her actual health problems, because this has been getting progressively worse for a while now. Hopefully someone she sees as an authority in the matter will actually convince her that she needs to take care of her health by putting it in the hands of professionals who can actually tell her what she should be doing to alleviate the problem.

It's extremely frustrating, because no matter what we say to her, she doesn't get that "wakeup call". She really needs someone in a position of medical authority to give it to her, and I think she might finally be edging over to being receptive of getting it in the first place.

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Cuthbert

Anybody know anything about COPD? I imagine there will be someone on here who will.

FETCHER.

Has anyone here's parents divorced?

My mum and dad are threatening divorce n it has come up a few times recently, I don't know if they're just saying this or if it'll actually happen. I can't take the stress of constantly crying over them if they're going to stay together. It devastates me each time it comes up and I wish they would just make their mind up.

What was it like for you ?

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FRED HALE SR.

My parents divorced when I was 3 years old. I think as an adult it would be much harder to deal with. There certainly were positives that came from it. My parents used to fight alot also. It might hurt but its usually for the best if you can't remain civil any longer. And you would celebrate two christmases and birthdays what could be cooler then that.

Plankton

We've lived similar lives Fred.

One of the drawbacks of parents divorcing when you're younger is that the divorcing parents will usually use the children as pawns in the court precedings, as well as in the emotional tug of war. Although it may happen if the divorce happens when the children are adults as well, it's not as psychologically damaging since an adult child will have the mental maturity to grasp the complicated concepts of it all. Of course it's going to be painful, change always is, but having the cognitive skills to maintain a level attitude would certainly be beneficial. I never had that choice, and it took alot of soul searching, meditation, and counseling with friends to really let go of all that baggage. My brother chose sides, and in doing so created a mental wall that when viewed from my perspective, is very sad. A child NEEDS both parents, wether they're together or not. My daughters mother did terrible terrible things to Hanna and Me, but I've always told Hanna that no matter what she does to us, she loves her even though it may not seem like it.

At any rate Fetch, keep strong for both sides, and if you can help it do not choose. It may not seem like the right thing now, but when the dust blows over, you'll be a better person for it.

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FRED HALE SR.

Definitely never take sides. It would just create more tension between your folks, that is sound advice. One thing I respect about both my parents is they never used us as pawns or spoke ill of the other. I think a mature approach to the proceedings is what left me with no baggage and great respect for both of my parents. They even still would get together on Holidays on occassion and be civil with one another.

Sansa Stark

My parents divorced when I was really young too ( I was 2 tho) so I don't really remember much about them even being married. My brother might but idk, I think my mom must have just married him bc she was knocked up or drunk the entire time.

Two Christmases was whack though, my dad's family is cheap as hell.

I hate both my parents though and they hate each other

FRED HALE SR.

Its a pulmonary disorder that can effect your heart and lungs. My mom suffers from it after going through chemotherapy years ago. She is doing just fine with it however. I'm assuming someone in your family has been diagnosed?

Burning Down

I know it's similar to asthma in the early stages but just gets progressively worse over time and it's hard to manage even with corticosteroids. There's no cure. The cause is almost always environmental (in most cases due to years of cigarette smoking, in others it's things like very bad air pollution and coal mining).

Here's some more info: What Is COPD? - NHLBI, NIH