ForrestTheFish

I'm starting a band which I've been working on for a while, and we have people on Drums, Piano/Keyboards, and Guitar so far. I'm playing guitar along with my best friend (Let's name him Bob, and lets name the drummer Bill). Heres where the problems come in

- Bob thinks he can sing live, and doesn't want the band to play live at all until he can sing, meaning no one but him can sing

- Bob's taking credit for things he shouldn't be doing. He tells everyone that he's starting a band, but he's the one who didn't even want to be in it in the first place before he changed his mind. He takes credit for songs I write too

- Bob isn't good enough to even play guitar in the band, and he thinks he can play lead

- Bob doesn't like the music that I like, so he refuses to play the kind of music I like even though I play the music he likes (which I don't like very much)

- Bob told his friend that he can play piano/keyboards in the band I'M starting (he said it was his), when I already had a friend that was gonna play piano, and now Bob is telling me that it's too bad for my friend, and that he's not gonna be playing. That just makes me so pissed off, I can't believe what a controlling ******* he's being, and he's not even the one starting the band.

- Bob has a friend who plays bass and told him that he could play in the band when his friend has only been playing bass for 6 months, and isn't very good at all. Now Bob is saying that he's gonna have to tell his friend that he can't play (That's a good thing).

- Bob is thinking of making this band a life goal, where when we grow up we're all gonna be in this huge famous band and he's gonna be a huge rock star. I think we should just have fun with it and play whatever any of us wants to play, and not worry about getting a record label or anything. His dreams are not his reality.

- Bob is an ******* to me sometimes and when I told him that the only thing I'm concerned about is the different music tastes. I told him that if I play the music he likes he should play a little that I like too. And you know what he said? "Maybe we shouldn't be in a band together."

I shouldn't be the one telling him that he's causing all of these problems, he has major self-esteem issues, and he's my best friend. His mom (WHO'S A BIG MUSIC PRODUCER) should be taking care of it! Not me!

Here are some other problems too.

My guitar teacher, who is also one of my good friends, is Bobs guitar teacher. My guitar teacher is Bobs hero. My guitar teacher (Let's call him John) can't tell me his opinion on the situation, he can't tell Bob what he thinks of the situation, he can't tell me what Bob thinks of the situation, and he can't tell Bob what I think of the situation. He can't do any of this because he wants things to work out with the band, and if he tells any of us he feels like it won't work out at all. The problem is, if he doesn't tell Bob that he's being a serious idiot than this band isn't gonna last two seconds.

So I'm stuck in a horrible position, and if only he was out of the band than it would all work out. We don't even have a band yet and look at all these problems he's causing already! Imagine what he'll do when we do have a band! It'll be hard to kick him out of the band because he's gonna want Bill in the band he's gonna start on his own. Bill is our guitar teachers son, and because of that, kicking Bob out will put everyone involved with the band in a bad position.

What do I do?!?! Thanks...

sleepy jack

1. If its your band it should be your job to tell him whats going on, not his mother.
2. You kind of come across as egotistic in parts and contradictory "I just wanna have fun. NO YOU CAN'T SING"
3. Yes, he is an ******* and be straight up with him. I don't think hes much of a best friend if you could dislike him so much.
4. It doesn't even sound like you have a much of a band anyway, and you'd be better off quitting and starting a new one.

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jackhammer

You sound like you are in trouble before you even start. a common goal is ESSENTIAL especially in your formative years. Good luck though!

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pheurton

Teach that bitch who is who.

ForrestTheFish

1. Actually, you're correct. Thank you for making me realize that.

2. Well, to have fun with someone who can't hit a note he's trying to hit and who's timing is way off kind of ruins the fun... hahaha

3. It's hard to explain, he's someone who is my best friend, but also someone who I dislike a lot... I don't know how to explain it.

4. Agreed.

Thanks man!

Voice_of_the_Soul12,13,01

My band is having somewhat, well, opposite problems with a member in our band; ironically, his name is Robert.

He isn't a control freak. Hell, he sucks so much we wish he was; he'd be contributing more than he is now. He doesn't practice, he can't play for ****, and whatever he does play is ****ty and not what we want to play. Most of our music isn't complex when it comes to bass parts, but we do like it to be more apart of the music in some way, and he'll tell us, "No, I'm gonna need to change that." We say "Why?" He says "I can't play that." It's like, "No **** you can't. That's what practicing is for."

Firing band members is hard, especially if he's your friend. We've been trying to find someone to replace our bass player, or else we would have fired him already.

What it comes down to is if he really is your friend he'll understand. If he's not, he'll be a whiny baby about it and stop being friends with you.

It's alot easier if you don't even like the guy; first guy we fired WAS actually a control freak, and a flamer as well who kept hitting on my guitarist. He also had not talent, and he viewed music as a business venture instead of art. Our singer, who wasn't great to look at but could sing really well (back when we were nu-metal); he didn't like her because she was fat. I say to him whether he'd want an ugly person who could sing or a hot person who couldn't. I might as well have been blowing air in his face.

That ****er was out. No band should have to deal with members who think they own the band (unless, of course, they actually DO), and who have no musical talent.


I say get with your other members and vote Bob out.

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I don't mean to dwell
But I can't help myself
When I feel the vibe
And taste a memory
Of a time in life
When years seemed to stand still

right-track

Never start a band with people named Bob.

swim

I'm glad Greg Norton didn't follow that rule of thumb.

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http://nakednaps.bandcamp.com/

right-track

Or Greg. ^

Are you American?

That's not irony, that's just a coincidence.

Voice_of_the_Soul12,13,01

Boo hoo, I get the two mixed up. "Coincidentally" is too long to type, and my hand is a wee bit stiffy from last night's concert. You knew what I was talking about, so what is the hang-up?

__________________
I don't mean to dwell
But I can't help myself
When I feel the vibe
And taste a memory
Of a time in life
When years seemed to stand still