Recently Uncovered Facts About the Chris Benoit Case
 

Guns don't kill people. Chris Benoit kills People.
There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of animals Chris Benoit allows to live.
Chris Benoit not sleep. He waits.
The chief export of Chris Benoit is Pain.
There is no chin under Chris Benoit's Beard. There is only another fist.
Chris Benoit has two speeds. Walk, and Kill.
The leading causes of death in the United States are: 1. Heart Disease 2. Chris Benoit 3. Cancer
Chris Benoit drives an ice cream truck covered in human skulls.
Chris Benoit is my Homeboy.
Chris Benoit doesn't go hunting.... CHRIS BENOIT GOES KILLING
When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chris Benoit.
Chris Benoit doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.
Outer space exists because it's afraid to be on the same planet with Chris Benoit.
Chris Benoit is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.
Chris Benoit is the reason why Waldo is hiding.
Chris Benoit counted to infinity - twice.
When Chris Benoit does a pushup, he isn’t lifting himself up, he’s pushing the Earth down.
Chris Benoit is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.
Chris Benoit hand is the only hand that can beat a Royal Flush.
Chris Benoit can lead a horse to water AND make it drink.
Chris Benoit doesn’t wear a watch, HE decides what time it is.
Chris Benoit gave Mona Lisa that smile.
Chris Benoit can slam a revolving door.
Chris Benoit does not get frostbite. Chris Benoit bites frost
Remember the Soviet Union? They decided to quit after watching a Chris Benoit wrestle on Satellite TV.
Contrary to popular belief, America is not a democracy, it is a Christatorship.
Chris Benoit house has no doors, only walls that he walks through.
How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck was Chris Benoit? ...All of it.
Chris Benoit CAN believe it's not butter.
In honor of Chris Benoit, all McDonald's in Canada have an even larger size than the super-size. When ordering, just ask to be Chrissized.
When Chris Benoit has sex with a man, it won't be because he is gay. It will be because he has run out of women.

you just took all the chuck norris jokes and replaced his name with chris benoit >: [

I downloaded a ROM of the original Oregon Trail. I named the people of my party:

Benoit
Bronson
Eastwood
Walken
and Cosby.

Benoit was the only one to never get sick or hurt.

This is a fact.

ayo son, that list hell out o date.
get wif tha news, chris benoit is ****in dead.














an his wife an kid.















an steve irwin














an anna nicole smiff















an christofer reeve















an harry potter

HARRY DIES?

**** YOU ***GOT

way to spoil it!

Damn, I didn't even realise he'd given it away! Now I hate you both.:nono:

Dirt fucking rules!!!!

Harry Potter is for queers

he dies? sweet. that actually makes me wanna read it. i just saw the most recent movie and it was weak. it was more kid-themed than ever. i want that little punk to get zapped.

w0rd. ^


;)

dood, harry doesn't die, nubs.





he gets breast implants.

Heres an interesting fact about the case.

A statement regarding the death of Benoits wife was added to Benoits wikipedia article 14 hours BEFORE Benoit and his family was found dead.

It reads

“Chris Benoit was replaced by Johnny Nitro for the ECW World Championship match at Vengeance, as Benoit was not there due to personal issues stemming from the death of his wife Nancy"

Even weirder, the IP address of the editor was traced to Stamford, Connecticut. Which is where WWE headquarters is located. The editor has come under investigation and could face criminal charges, but his or her identity is still unknown.

Sounds very fishy to me.

Its time to make up ridiculous conspiracy theories.

His son did it!

He murdered his mother because she wouldn't buy him the latest computer console and when Chris turned up at home he tricked his father into playing a game of 'head in a rope'.

The editor of the wiki article turns up on the doorstep to apologise for his "little joke" on the site, when to his horror he realises what has happened and kills the boy in panic.



EDIT: wow...Chris Benoit mystery editor confesses: Claims & - Wikinews, the free news source

umm if you don't mind me saying thats an interesting theory right track but i think personally that chris did kill them and this is what i think went down exactly...

he killed his wife and the his son saw him do it and then the next day his son says he's gunna tell and thats how the thing got on the internet in conn. cuz the son put it up and then chris furious with rage smuthered him with the pillow and the next day realizes what he has done is grieved and upset that he doesn't know what else to do but kill himself because he can't live with the guilt and shame of what he had done so he hangs himself........


thats what i think went down.....

oh and i personally don't think harry potter is dumb or anything its quiet interesting on how much money it has made.....

:rolleyes:

thanks, you agree???

Hahahaha

what was it funny cuz chances are its true or is it funny cuz there is no way i am right or is it a little bit of both

Funny because you're a moron

We'd all been so nice................

why am i the moron i didn't kill my wife and kid and then hang myself chris did not me i am not the moron i am still alive

Thats not moronic thats just good news.

ohh ur not a fan of him ehhh????? (damn yooper accent is caatching up with me)

He means its a compelling and profitable news story.

God bless America.

What?:thumb:

**** dat **** son. why you upset about haary potter but you aint upset bout chripster reeve?

ill spoil anotha story fo you then, ya clown****er.

chripster reeves wife dana reeve dies too.








of lung cancer









an kirby pucket









an dimebag darel









but tupac still alive son.

fixed.

i swear this is a first... im gonna hold you to this statement.

:rofl:

God bless you, Dirt.

hummmffff
 

ur a moron.......well no i shouldn't say that cuz i am not going to lower myself
to what your guy's level......

Before you call someone a moron you should learn how to spell you're and cause.

thats who most teensd i know spell it and its cactches on its like a diease but anyway thats not the point i said i wasn't going to call any one any names CAUSE(there you happy your royal highness??!?!?!?!?!) its just rude and stupid

Someone ban ^, for ****'s sakes.

teens* catches* disease* Or is that how most teens spell it now? I don't think 'but everyone else does it' is any excuse to look like a dyslexic 11 year old in an AOL chatroom.

ur... ur an.........ughh if i could only find the perfect word for what yuo are... but since i can't i guess i stick with saying this..."if i had an enternity to insult you i would noever run out of things to say about you (bad wise)"

when did they let retards onto the internet?

They do what they want

HAHAAAAAA. yeah. first porn, now music forums. god really has a sense of humor.

SNOG ME

wtf, hogquartz?