Confession Time: My Real Identity
 

This isn't so much of an introduction as a return.

Some of you may remember this as the account used by a member formerly known as TumorAttitude.

However she is not the one using this account right now, she gave me this account to use since she doesn't use it anymore.

I'm actually someone who used to be a regular on this forum back in the day until I was permabanned. I am boo boo.

So here's the story. I haven't thought about this place for years, but just recently I checked my LastFM shoutbox which I NEVER do and I found a message that went ignored for almost a year, it was from May 19, 2021.

A user named FillardMillmore who goes by the username SoundgardenRocks on this forum explained to me that my account has been officially unbanned.

Obviously I'm pretty late to the news, unfortunately I tried to log into my old account and I was unable to because I've completely forgotten my password, and worse yet this site didn't remember my email address.

Meanwhile FillardMillmore hasn't been active on LastFM for like a year so I doubt he'd respond to me.

But then I remembered that back in 2016 my friend Annie gave me her old account and said I could use it, I have lurked here using this account a few times but I only ever posted here like once or twice, the main reason being that I was afraid I would give away who I really am and would get banned immediately if a mod figured it out, so I didn't bother.

Well now I want to come clean since I can't log into my old account and I would like to know if my unbanning is indeed official and someone isn't playing a prank on me.

I wouldn't be surprised if even after a decade some people here still don't want me back, I got into some heated feuds that lead to me having a complete meltdown which is what got me permabanned. However I'm in my mid 30s now and my temperment is not the same as it was when I was in my early 20s, I also came out as trans way back in 2013. A lot has changed since I was banned back in 2011 or whenever it was, it's so long ago I can't even remember.

So I have a question. Can any of the mods here help me log into my old account? Because that would be great. If that's not possible I hope it's ok with everyone if I continue to use this account instead now that I've made it clear who I really am. Or I could just make a new one if I'm allowed to do that.

The legend! You banning half the forum has been forum mythology since time immemorial.

Yeah I barely remember stuff like that, that's how long it's been lol.

LOL no way

omg hiiii
nice to meet another returning forum legend <3 one of the perks of covid I suppose
the mod team did officially unban you. welcome back! sadly I'm pretty sure that this website is too ****ty to recover old accounts when the password is forgotten, so I think you're stuck with this one

Oh ****, welcome back. I've heard whisperings of how your life has changed since from some former members, how've you been?

I'm ok I guess, I honestly had no idea I was still talked about on this forum, I assumed everyone who knew me was gone by now and it was all new folks.

Considering just how long it's been I've likely forgotten a lot of people I used to interact with. :(

And yeah some things have changed for me, I came out as a trans woman 8 years ago but because I live in a crappy little rural Tennessee town where resources for trans people are completely nonexistent I haven't been able to make any kind of physical transition, I'm still not on HRT or anything and yes it freaking sucks. I still live with my grandmother as well.

Online I've remained a member of another music forum DDD which is much less active than this one and I'm on Facebook where I stay in touch with two former regulars of this forum, Annie and Ethan.

Here is my LastFM if anyone wants to follow me.

https://www.last.fm/user/kingboobs

I'm sorry you haven't been able to get much support, have you looked into trying to relocate somewhere else? I don't know the situation in its entirety, so I apologize if that hasn't been feasible. I'm friends with Ethan still on facebook, I mainly just see them ****post music and political stuff these days, which I'm cool with. I haven't been in contact with Annie lately, but I was a pretty ****ty person for a bit (to put it lightly) so we haven't interacted for a few years. I'm Alex/Loose_Lips btw.

Moving at this time is unrealistic, money is a huge obstacle and I don't want to leave my grandmother, she's 80 now and has a lot of health issues so she needs me, she likes living where we do because it's where much of our immediate family lives.

I hate living here but I just have to deal with it the best I can.

I steal Ethan’s memes from Facebook and post them in the discord server

Haha. Yeah he shares some real gems on there.

I linked this thread to him earlier so it's possible he might still be lurking around here. :shycouch:

He’s teased us before with the odd drop-in but I can’t blame him for never sticking around lol

Hey boobs.

I think I joined around the time of your meltdown but wasn't active enough to notice it much or really have a memory of it. However, with incredible hard work and volunteered time, I eventually became such a huge d*ckhead that they made it official and turned my name blue. All this led to us deciding it'd be funny if we unbanned you to see if you came back and here you are.

Everything happens for a reason and I'm glad you're here.

I'm NEVER gonna lose that nickname am I?

I honestly didn't know that was a thing already. My brain went right to it.

Some guy on DDD started calling me that in like 2006 and it stuck forever.

If you don't know what DDD is it stands for DigitalDreamDoor, it was started by this old hippie named Lew as a site to promote his artwork then one day in like 2003 he went on a rant about Rolling Stone's 100 Greatest Guitarist list (as boomers were fond of doing at the time) and made his own list in response to it, and then he made a bunch more music lists and eventually the site grew popular enough to expand into a music forum.

This shouldn't come as much of a surprise but I was as much of a controversial figure there as I was here, I found this forum specifically to replace that one but over time I realized I got along better with the community there than the one here.

This is around the time I started to realize that maybe I was the problem lol.

This is pretty neat.

Well well well well...welcome back!

I honestly don't remember much about you, except that you were kind of nerdy and I think had some sort of native american heritage or were native american? I totally missed your meltdown but you have been referenced (including by myself) ever since as the golden standard for loony-bin members. Probably unfairly. :D

This is kind of interesting, I went back to some of our interactions and as late as 2010 you had some curious notions about the topic of gender. You evolved pretty quickly after that, so congrats, regardless of your current circumstances. :)

What do you call yourself now? Not sure if I caught your previous real life name.

Shame you can't return to posting under your original username. That would be a bit of a trip.

The Native American thing was something I exaggerated back in the day because I was a dumb redneck kid having an identity crisis, my grandma told me I had Native American heritage but I'm older and wiser now and I'm pretty sure she's full of sh*t. I'm more Scottish than anything.

Anyway I go by Brie. I do intend to change my name legally someday, it's pretty much the only thing I can do in my state as far as paperwork is concerned.

Nice to meet you Brie. Stick around...:)

I'll stick around if y'all have me. :beer:

It's probably better if you create a new account if you can't retrieve your old one. Just not to confuse things if future alien historians pour through these archives at some point. ;)

Eh that's ok, Annie said I can keep using this one and change my username, I just messaged Yac about that so the name should change shortly.

Just remember that anything before 2016 is Annie and not me, that was when she gave me this account and I made like 4 posts and then just gave up because it would have been too difficult to talk about my interests without people wondering why the hell Annie got into Yes all of a sudden.

Wow, I did not expect this. Welcome back.

Chula would be so offended.

A legend for sure. Nice to meet ya, Brie.

Is Guitar101 unbanned too? That'd be a real hoot.

I secretly unbanned everybody a few weeks ago.

I believe my use of that gif was better.

It was, yes. I just wanted to keep the theme going. Squish face

Let's see if Merit is Q-pilled yet.

Well, this has been an interesting story to read! Welcome back, boo boo :wavey:
We've never "met" as you'd already gone by the time I arrived, but yes, your legend has lived on and, because I've dipped into many old threads here, I kept coming across your posts. Mainly in prog rock discographies and things like that: you were a prolific poster here, back in the day.

Active membership is not what it used to be, but I hope you find something here to hold your interest again.

It's still in much better shape than my other forum, which will have to be taken out back by the shed soon enough.

Welcome back, boo boo

Oh hey Big3 long time no see, you're one of the old guard that stuck around huh?

I left for awhile. This place felt like a job. I came back more frequently during COVID.

I also think most music coming out right now is worse than ****. So I don't know what the hell I'm doing here.

There's still a lot of newer music I can appreciate but then I check out 100 gecs because they're a zoomer meme and I come to the terrifying realization that I am in fact getting old.

I've seen your posts about prog rock. You were never young.