look at all this loving adoption-ness. is no one willing to take wee little me under the wide shade of an experianced wing?

My resume:
My name is Tumor. I'm a little nofestited bitch. I play guitar, and write music, and paint, but I'm not very good at any of that. Sometimes I amuse myself by putting my mother's giant pads on stop signs. I like music. Stone Temple Pilots is my favorite band. I don't see the comparisons to Pearl Jam. There isn't really anything special about me. I'm mindblowingly ordinary. I guess we'll be having the sex now.
You're kind of a ****. I admire that.

You really wouldn't want just any member...

How about a request? They might respond to that.

1. Sex, nah the time has to be right.
2. Shirley Temple's Pussy is acceptable
3. You don't have to know anything about guitar to be awesome.

David Fair - How to Play Guitar | Ear Poke

And now for my introduction.
I am T-Liz, I am not really great but I got stache.
While you are under my "wing" basically you will do what you normally do but with some added bonuses.

- If you become curious about a new genre of music, pm me for suggestions and about four different links will be YOURS!!!!

-??????

-PROFIT!

-I'll back you up in any debate, even if you're completely, utterly wrong.

-I'll post hundreds of knock-knock jokes on pages of people you hate.

And provide advice when needed, otherwise you're a free thingy.

I'll retain this position as long as you wish, I'll add other responsibilities as I go along.

I'd love to, but I don't know anyone, thus my desire for a mentor.

See, Lizard, you're just not setting a good example...

Yeeeeeeeeeeeeeah!

Sometimes I imagine myself as an alien visiting Earth who, observing humans for the first time, is thinking how disturbing and peculiar their mannerisms are compared to those of intelligent life forms on its home planet.

Guess wat guysssss..... this hawt mutha is up for adoption. I'm sexy and cool and even have great music taste too.

I'm open to this adoption business.

Do I have to advertise myself?

If I fabricate an elaborate history of male abuse and a penchant for female affection do I become eligible for a female mentor? No? Yes? Please.

:o: