Exo's Half-Assed Album Review Thread
 

Greetings from your neighborhood Exo!

Remember last fall when we had all those album review threads? Well, I'm bored as f*ck so I decided I was going to try my hand at the same format. Hell, with Trollheart MIA, I feel like somebody has to pick up some of the slack. I'm willing to step in. However, there are going to be some differences from previous threads like this. Here's how it'll work.

• You recommend me albums.
• I write about them the only way I know how...half assed. I've never been very good at expressing myself when talking about music so my review will be blunt, short, and probably uneducated. It'll be easier for me to actually review most submissions and easier for readers to skim through them.
• I'm only reviewing albums I haven't heard before or haven't heard in a long time. If you submit one of my favorite albums or just an album I have a history with, I'll ask for another.
• I don't care what genre it is. Submit anything.
• There will be a master list in this post just like it's usually done.
• If I can't stream it on Spotify, Bandcamp, or Youtube, you'll have to try another one.

This summer is going to be very boring for me since I'm not getting a lot of hours at Barnes and Noble and because I'm job searching so this should get updated pretty frequently.

Submit away...

Review Order

Kesha - Warrior Review Here
Leonid Fedorov, Vladimir Volkov, John Medeski & Marc Ribot - Razin, Rim I Lev - Review Here
The Strokes - Future Present Past Ep Review Here
Old Time Relijun - Lost Light - Review Here
Daydream Society - Daze End Review Here
Nickleback - No Fixed Address
Violent J - Wizard of the Hood
David Grisman Quintet - S/T
Tin Hat - The Sad Machinery Of Spring
Kommunity FK - The Vision and the Voice
Gojira - Magma
Seether - Disclaimer II
Moss Lime - Zoo Du Quebec
Hayden Who - Blue

Leonid Fedorov, Vladimir Volkov, John Medeski & Marc Ribot - Razin, Rim I Lev

https://www.discogs.com/de/%D0%9B%D0...elease/2195656

F*ck.

Not an album but an ep... want to see your thoughts on the Future Present Past Ep from the strokes.

I've been meaning to listen to this. Good one.

http://cdn.pitchfork.com/albums/5891...e.4b24590c.jpg
Old Time Relijun - Lost Light

Sorry, I was gonna post some hipster post-rock **** but then I was like nah.

I'm not that into post rock. Who am I? Some pansy? Some nerd? Some lame ass? Ki?

Real men listen to Ke$ha. And soon... you will too.

Daydream Society - Daze End

http://www.homorazzi.com/wp-content/...bum-review.jpg

Kesha - Warrior - Submitted by Batf*ck

It is only fitting that my first review is this album. Great job being alert Bats. You earned this one. This chick has been in the news a lot lately for trying to get out of the hands of that f*cking prick of a manager she has. I've actually only heard one of her songs, or at least I think so. My memory says it's that "Tick Tock" song and I hope for the state of my mental health this album is made up of better songs than that.

First tracks to me are very important. Title track starts off this album. To tell you the truth, it isn't that bad. Not my cup of pop but still not horrible. Then the second song started and I realized that I actually have heard another song by Kesha and it happens to be this one. I think I heard it in the car of my very club going and party animal friend who f*cks super models. Is this the key to f*cking super models? Kesha? Should I start blasting this album at intersections in the hope of a bunch of big titty women jumping in my passenger seat? Nah, I'll take my dignity and do things the old fashioned way, hope some beautiful women like bearded nerds with Nirvana shorts on who sit at the end of the bar.

Here's something I don't like already. Her choruses aren't that bad. It's that thing she does in almost every song I've heard so far. She's kind of rapping but not really. How do you describe that? It's not singing, yet not talking, yet not rapping. I'm not into it.

There's a lot of autotune on this thing. I wish I heard what she actually sounds like.

Lyrics so far have been very angsty. She just wants to go out and live the way she wants. That's nice. I'm glad you have a lot of money and yet you're still complaining about not being able to have fun. Ughh. I told myself that I wouldn't skip any songs but this is getting hard. I actually didn't mind the first/title track and now things have gotten horrible. Bats, are you really into this? You're serious? You're not just being funny/not funny? To each his own I guess. Let's see if this gets better.

...

I like some of this "Crazy Kids" track. She just ruins **** with that not rapping thing. Just sing bitch.

IT'S IGGY POP!!?? What??? This better be good. Okay, I like this. It has a lot to do with Iggy but I do like this. Not bad.

Looks like we finally have track where all she does is sing. She has a decent voice. There should be more tracks like this but in the end, it really isn't that good of a song. I guess I was just begging for something less party.

Supernatural is the best track on this album. Great breakdown in the middle of that thing. I'd actually listen to this song again.

...

Okay now I'm just waiting for this album to end. So much meh after that nice track. "Out Alive" at least has some energy to it. The last five or so songs were just boring. Almost done. It's actually been less sh*tty than I thought it was going to be. Some decent tracks.

And it's done. It ends with a track we've all heard during our 8th grade dance. Bleh. Overall it was a bit of a chore. Sorry Bats, you didn't win me over. There were some decent tracks and one very favorable one but it just didn't land with me man. At least now I have the power to claim I listened to a full Kesha album. The chick definitely needs to sing more and stop with that white girl rapping thing. It just doesn't sound good.

4.5/10

Fav Tracks - Warrior, Dirty Love, Supernatural, Out Alive
Recommended Listening - Grimes, Oh Wonder

You know, I was going to be nice, but just for that, review this:

https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikiped...back_Album.jpg

F*ck it. Bring it on bitch.

Brought...

Violent J - Wizard of the Hood

http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/...UL._SX355_.jpg

You knew it was coming ***got

That's why I had the gif waiting before I even clicked on the thread when I saw you were the last poster.

I won't let this thread go down that road but that looks hysterical so I'm going to do it for the laughs.

Goddamn.

I've only been really scrobbling for like a year or so, so it's entirely possible that last.fm missed the height of my Ke$ha obsession. That's why Manowar is only at #6 on the list.

David Grisman Quartet
https://images-na.ssl-images-amazon....16D9DMNCVL.jpg

Not sure if you heard this one or not. The music is described by Grisman as "Dawg Music," a mix of moslty Bluegrass, Jazz with some Classical and other. A personal favorite of mine. (Paul Smeenus too, I think he seen them in concert!)

That's not at all what I'd imagine "dawg music" to sound like.

http://i.imgur.com/pZoKsfG.jpg?1

Leonid Fedorov, Vladimir Volkov, John Medeski & Marc Ribot - Razin, Rim I Lev - Razin, Rim I Lev - Submitted By Grindy

I love John Medeski so this should be a pleasure. I'm not familiar with Fedorov or Volkov but Marc Ribot is f*cking awesome. I'm a huge Tom Waits fan and the dude basically helped Tom find his sound over the last few decades. This should be great.

Album is already off to a bang. The vocals, while not exactly my bread and butter, are very fitting for this type of instrumentation and I'm really digging it. The third track "Battle" is very influenced by Ribot's history with Waits in my opinion. I could see this being a track on one of his albums. Very dark and brooding.

Vocals sound very balkan. Let's wiki this voice. Nope. Russian. In a way, I should have known that by looking at the name.

Okay, the last two tracks have been fantastic. Lots of driving guitar and bass. The vocals are starting to really mold into the music and I honestly really dig it.

Love the darkness on this so far. The intermittent pluckings of a banjo and violin really add to that sinister and dark folk sound. Really neat. Even the more somber songs on this album are very good.

I was waiting for a weird track. Got it. Aptly named too. "Torture". What the f*ck is this guy saying? It sounds like he's conjuring up a demon.

Some really nice guitar work on this last track here.

Excellent submission grindy. I want more stuff like this. I'll be going back to this one. Great guitar work and vocals to produce a generally haunting yet energetic gypsy horror dream. Loved it.

9/10

Fav Tracks - Morning(Underway), Division of the Loot, Dance
Recommended - Tom Waits, Teho Teardo, Masada

pumped for your strokes reviews...

Glad you dug Razin, Rim I Lev.
I might hit you with some russian stuff again at some point.
Let's take a break for now though.

Next rec:
Tin Hat - The Sad Machinery Of Spring

https://img.discogs.com/HWLKybninsYK...406687.jpg.jpg
Kommunity FK - The Vision and the Voice

a little classic deathrock :)

^kfmmci(i)tu

https://consequenceofsound.files.wor...0&h=380&crop=1

The Strokes - Future Present Past - Submittd by The Identity Matrix

So, like most borderline hipsters, I have a history with The Strokes. I listened to them in high school before their third album release and still consider Is This It and Room on Fire to be great albums. I go back and forth between which one I like better but I find them both to be incredibly catchy and great for driving to. Their third album was a disappointment and honestly, I haven't given anything else a listen so this is going to be the first new Strokes material I've heard in years. I'm not going to include the remix that's at the end of this because it's just not necessary. Let's see how it goes...

Okay, they still have a drum set. That's nice.

Casablancas has definitely aged a bit although it's hard to tell because his voice is muted a bit. I'm getting a post punk vibe going on right now. I miss the garage rock sound but this is okay. Man, his vocals are drowned in sh*t. It's like he's under water. Not digging that.

Second song, OBLIVIOUS, sounds much better. Still not a fan of the vocals. He just sounds off to me. Lots of soul in this song though. I'll give it to ol' Julian, he's trying in this song a lot. I like this one. Nice melodies. I might just give the remix a listen because I can see how it's a target for that kind of thing. I can see it being a CLUB HIT SMASH with the DOODLY DOODLY DOODLY DOOS at the end.

Ooooooo...down song. Okay, it's official, Casablancas lost a bit. Third song confirmed. That's okay though. Change is good. It just so happens to be one of the big reasons I listened to The Strokes so much as a kid. I guess I'm just kinda of nostalgic. Average song unfortunately.

So yeah. Three songs. One good one, two average ones. I'm glad to see their back making music but like I said like three times, Casblancas has lost a step in the vocal department. I guess copious alcohol binges can damage your chords.

5.5/10

Fav Tracks - OBLIVIOUS
Recommended - Older Strokes

Nice review! Thanks for taking a look at it.

Next recommendation is...

Magma by Gojira....

You probably already hear that one though so let me know if you have.

I started listening to it but got interrupted so I'll give it another go.

Review Disclaimer II by Seether.

That's some good trolling.

And I get two?

You weren't trolling with the Kesha album though. You actually like that.

Yeah... right... I wasn't trolling at all... lol

... I wasn't trolling...