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Old 03-09-2016, 06:30 AM   #1 (permalink)
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Default Eurovision 2016 Thread

Hey all, I'm back for the Eurovision Song Contest 2016. I'm so looking forward to sharing with you the cheese, the s***, the blood, the tears, and whatever else is in store for the world's biggest music contest this year.

Get ready for
  • Gays and lesbians!
  • Terrible, out-of-key performances!
  • Cheap versions of well-known pop songs!
  • Bad staging!
  • Crap costumes and even worse back-up dancing and singing!
  • Political intrigue!
...and last but not least, a whole lotta fun!
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Old 03-09-2016, 06:40 AM   #2 (permalink)
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Default First is the Worst

You know what they say! The first is the worst!

Are you ready for the absolute trainwreck that is Belarus' Eurovision 2016 entry? Think carefully before you hit play, and please let me know if you survive more than 30 seconds of this torture.



It might have been an okay concept, but it's lost on me, and most everyone else who was watching that night, unfortunately. We're not expecting this to make it past the semi-finals.

Next up is the dated, poorly executed, and just plain boring entry from Switzerland. FFS who are those sad souls cheering this flat performance on. I could not be more unenthused about this song, which is hardly bearable. Not planning to see this at the final on May 14th either. Song needs a complete revamp.



Poor thing.

The last song in my bottom three is unfortunately the Travel Channel ballad from the United Kingdom. Although it would be great as the background track for an Alaskan cruise, I just can't stand that this is the best the UK could do this year. Come on, Brits! Put some effort into it!



That said, the boys themselves are not bad, and of course we will be seeing this at the final, as the UK is already pre-qualified as one of the big five.

Stay tuned for a breakdown of all of this year's songs. Not going to get your hopes up, but maybe you'll find something you actually like along the way.

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Old 03-09-2016, 07:09 AM   #3 (permalink)
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Good write up, looking forward to following the thread.

Swiss is the best out of them, not saying much I know. British one is very dull. Had heard it was bad but this is the first time hearing it. I liked last year's one.

What is the criteria for the songwriters? Could we put an Arctic Monkeys track forward if we wanted to?
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Old 03-09-2016, 08:10 AM   #4 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by monkeytennis View Post
What is the criteria for the songwriters? Could we put an Arctic Monkeys track forward if we wanted to?
I'm not an expert on all of it, but the songs have to be written after September 1st (or sometime around then), they must not be longer than three minutes, and they can't be political. Also no live instrument playing. So if the Arctic Monkeys agreed to all that they could represent. There's also no requirement to be of the nationality for the country you represent. Beyonce could represent Moldova if she wanted to.

The real issue is that nowadays it's such a trashfest that no one with a decent reputation would ever waste time on it. It's like a showcase of "The Voice" rejects.

That said, some famous people got their start at Eurovision (Celine Dion and Abba, for example). It hasn't really happened too much in recent years though. The trend nowadays is more toward Eurovision ruining your career forever. Hehe.
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Old 03-10-2016, 08:45 AM   #5 (permalink)
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Thanks Miss P. It is trashy but I guess that's a lot of the appeal
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Old 03-11-2016, 10:12 AM   #6 (permalink)
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I hope it is a good Eurovision this year..well at least I do not have to travel far to see it

Melodifestivalen is still running here in Sweden and the final is on Saturday. My personal favorite is this guy..but then my personal favorite never wins.



My husband is rooting for this girl:



Or these guys could win since the students wil probably be playing this song all friggin summer long and its catchy:




Maybe Sweden again for 2017 ?

Last edited by Lilja; 03-11-2016 at 10:29 AM.
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Old 03-17-2016, 09:54 AM   #7 (permalink)
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I wanted Viktoria to win, too. The fact that you guys chose Frans is beyond depressing. What did you like about him?
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Old 03-17-2016, 10:10 AM   #8 (permalink)
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Default Rock Bands?

This year has attracted a number of rock bands, which we usually don't see that many of at Eurovision. One or two, but four? Surprising!

Romania shocked everyone this year with its rock ballad choice, "Moment of Silence." Fun fact, the lead singer, Ovidiu, is a famous dog breeder in Romania.



I actually loved this song when I heard it. I probably would have voted for it, too. Gotta love the half-naked swordsman. And honestly, without this kind of entry, you just don't really feel like its Eurovision. Not a winner, but a hilarious and oddly memorable song nonetheless. Romania has never not qualified for the Eurovision final, so we'll be seeing this on May 14th.

As usual, Montenegro is delivering on weirdness. I actually thought this song had huge potential and the video is cool, too. There are parts that are kind of like...whoa, cool. But no glue holding it together, unfortunately. You might like it though.



Not your typical Eurovision trash, that's for sure. But what is it, then?

Georgia's entry doesn't really disappoint, but it's so monotone and indie it will probably get overlooked this year. I would be surprised if this qualifies at all, but it's not a bad song. Just way to "cool" for the average Eurovision voter. We're used to obscure from Georgia, though.



They kind of remind me of the White Stripes for some reason.

The entry from Cyprus is probably the best quality from the rock variant, regardless of the very Nickelbacky thing going on. It at least sounds radio friendly and has a memorable chorus. I think this will surely qualify, but it's always a toss up to be honest.



Yeah this is actually more dancey the more I listen to it, too. Well, I feel really neutral about it. We'll have to see which of these makes it through the competitive semi-final rounds this year.

Stay tuned, there are plenty more coming!
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Old 03-17-2016, 10:47 AM   #9 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by misspoptart View Post
I wanted Viktoria to win, too. The fact that you guys chose Frans is beyond depressing. What did you like about him?
I think that it has to do with several things. First, it was a simple set...no fancy lights...no bling. Just Frans. Secondly, the song is cute and catchy....not to mention that Frans is famous for singing this tune about the football player Zlatan:



That song is still sung today and pretty much everyone knows it here. In fact, I havent met anyone who doesn't- Zlatan, Zlaaatan
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Old 03-19-2016, 10:59 AM   #10 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lilja View Post
I think that it has to do with several things. First, it was a simple set...no fancy lights...no bling. Just Frans. Secondly, the song is cute and catchy....not to mention that Frans is famous for singing this tune about the football player Zlatan:



That song is still sung today and pretty much everyone knows it here. In fact, I havent met anyone who doesn't- Zlatan, Zlaaatan
That explains a lot!
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