Forum Member Album Reviews

[Tristan_Geoff]

Originally Posted by The Batlord

You mean Trouble Salad?

No it's a new alias of his.

[Mondo Bungle]

Not that new. But I have got it dialed in now. It'll be featured on the TS page though.

https://soundcloud.com/lord-salad/sa...trumental-demo

After all is said and done, it will be a monster breed of industrial rock, punk, noise, house/edm, ethnic fusion, dub, grind, and post rock

[Lucem Ferre]

So I will do My great review of the Coming Soon album by artist hashtag hashtag hashtag hashtag hashtag AKA ##### AKA #X5

The first track is called Coming Soon. It starts off with the wonderful noise of a refrigerator being left open and is accompanied by a well-played garbage disposal from his sink. Suddenly you hear the random clang coming from what must be a Native American summoning the spirits to come together to warn us of what is coming soon. Eventually you get to hear the noise of hashtag hashtag hashtag hashtag hastag commenting on the Music Banter forum in the background. It all slowly starts to fade out, because of he didn’t pay the power bill.

9/10 for Native pride.

The next song is called Piece It Together, which starts out with the hum of a hair razor that is probably being used to shave hashtag hashtag hashtag hashtag hastag’s pubes. You can hear a very distorted snare drum perump through the song. Eventually the pube shaving razor is followed by the sound of an airplane flying over his house. Eventually you hear the sound of somebody winding up a ****ty wind-up toy from a happy meal. The noise from the razor and the airplane are joined by hashtag hashtag hashtag hashtag hastag’s mom vacuuming in the other room with that snare drum still parading in and out. Then you can hear a really loud garbage truck driving outside. With the sounds of the razor, the vacuum, the plane and the garbage truck you finally hear that signature refrigerator being left open, and at that point it is all pieced together with a solid humming and rough humming sound. It all slows down to a quieter sound of a motorcycle.

8/10 for that open refrigerator homage to the first track.

The next song is called Deathly Afraid of Musicals. It is quite obvious at this point that hashtag hashtag hashtag hashtag hashtag is afraid of musicals because they have completely avoided creating something that could be considered musical. It starts out with the sound of some kind of plucky instrument, and random crashing noises because he sucks at playing asteroid. You can also hear plucky noises in reverse. It all dies out to the sound of him dying in asteroid again, then it is followed by the hum of the arcade cabinet which comes to a sudden halt because he forgot to pay the power bill again.

6/10 because he sucks at Asteroid.

This next song is called is called Bringing You Along and it starts out with what we all know is the bell signaling another battle in Mortal Kombat. You can hear the noises of nature from around the arena and the klinging of jack ass Johnny Cage fans ringing bells. Suddenly it is all interrupted by the gardener using his leaf blower at the worst possible time, and he should be fired for it. Perhaps that gardener is hashtag hashtag hashtag hashtag hastag. He should be fired regardless. Suddenly the hi pitched squeal of Lui Kang’s train whistle voice blows through all the noise as he goes in for the karate kick. The leaf blower gets louder then suddenly dies out with the noise of Johnny cage smacking the **** out of Lui Kang in the back ground. Then the sudden noise of Lui Kang blowing a whistle twice because he is being sexually assaulted by Cage. They deem it to be fair though, because he only punched him in the nuts and didn’t grope. The leaf blower gets a little louder then leaves. It all suddenly dies because they didn’t pay the power bill.

10/10 for Johnny Cage nut punches.

This next song is called Unforgettable Sound Waves and it is filled with some pretty unmemorable tides of noise. It is filled with noises that are only created by robots that can blow bubbles. You can also hear the noise of cars passing his house in the back ground and some intense ear flicking going on that gets only more and more intense by the second. Eventually you can hear muttered noises of somebody punching the **** out of their church organ. Eventually the traffic outside dies down and it comes to an abrupt end probably do to not paying the power bill. I can’t help to think that I’ve heard this before, on Kanye West’s Late Registration album.

0/10 for ripping off Kanye.

This next song is called Sound The Bells and it is filled the noise of two velociraptors whispering to each other as they play Porky’s for the Atari. You can hear the hum of the generator as the power has obviously been turned off at Jurrassic Park, because they can’t pay that goddamn power bill. Suddenly somebody rings the door bell and the velociraptor’s put the game on pause. They go to answer the door and the song suddenly stops with the game glitching out, leaving me wanting more.

9/10 for Jurassic park.

The next song is called A Ridiculous Sense Of Humor. It starts off with the sound of a giant robotic Bill Cosby telling a joke and laughing. It is followed by the sound of hashtag hashtag hashtag hashtag hastag shaving his pubes while he simultaneously brushes his teeth. It suddenly stops with another bit by giant robot Bill Cosby in space with him laughing a little too hard at his own joke and cuts back to hashtag hashtag hashtag hashtag hastag shaving his pubes and brushing his teeth. That suddenly cuts into what is probably the longest robot fart I’ve ever heard which very very very slowly transitions into the sound of a weed whacker. So maybe hashtag hashtag hashtag hashtag hastag is some kind of land scaper. The sound of the weed whacker gets more and more intense than slowly sputters out into the sound of his shower. Suddenly you hear the sound of hashtag hashtag hashtag hashtag hastag burning himself with the hot water and the song understandably ends shortly after.

10/10 for the deep commentary on the Bill Cosby date rape scandals.

This next song has me a bit puzzled on the deeper meaning of it. It’s called 2345 and it has some extremely distorted sound of what sounds like a voice but I can’t tell. It’s cool to hear hashtag hashtag hashtag hashtag hastag experiment with distortion, but this just sounded like a bunch of gargled noise to me. Maybe I’m just not getting it.

3/5 it didn’t make much sense and just sounded like a bunch of noise, it’s obvious filler.

Fake Out Make Out shows hashtag hashtag hashtag hashtag hashtag’s extreme talent when it comes to recording his neighbor’s ****ty band. It is filled with extremely loud drumming and the very very low hum of the guitar. It is eventually joined with the noises of somebody tapping their pen and playing with a techdeck very well with the beat. It all builds up with the sound of his mom vacuuming and a few bumble bees flying into a fan.

7/10 extremely well done bumble bee suicide missions, but the techdeck could have been better.

The final song is called Farewell and here hashtag hashtag hashtag hashtag hashtag gets really deep into his personal battles he’s faced with overcoming his addiction to putting glue on his hands, waiting for it to dry and peeling it off. It starts off with the bellowing of a dying whale with the sound of rapidly plugging and unplugging your ears with your fingers. The bellowing whale sounds start getting more and more melancholy as the song goes on, yet it is filled with hope. You hear the sound of a door suddenly slam in your right ear as if hashtag hashtag hashtag hashtag hashtag is slamming the door on his addiction. The sad whale belts are getting more and more hopeful and starts to resemble some sort of religious moment with in a church. It is then revealed in the lyrics that hashtag hashtag hashtag hashtag hashtag had found the flying spaghetti monster whom, with hashtag hashtag hashtag hashtag hashtag’s faith, helped him out of such a dark time in his life. It all gets gargled away with the sound of an angry garbage truck and the whale starts to sound ominous, as the lyrics tell us of the relapse hashtag hashtag hashtag hashtag hashtag just had. It was the perfect way to end the album.

10/10 for the extremely deep and personal story of the struggle with addiction, that truly touched my heart.

It’s the best political punk trap album I have ever heard, and it definitely sets the standard for how a political punk trap album should be done. The weak points of ripping off Kanye with the extremely dull Unforgettable Sound Waves (had to look up the name because I forgot it) and putting that ridiculous spat of noise that is 2345 is majorly made up for by the Mortal Kombat classic that is Bringing You Along where you are brought along to the day job of the yard worker for the Mortal Kombat tournaments, and the heart wrenching finale that is Farewell

I give this album a 9/10

:c lap:

Worst Songs:
2345
Unforgettable Sound Waves

Best Songs:
Bringing You Along
A Rediculous Sense Of Humor
Farewell

LISTEN TO THE ALBUM HERE

[Key]

Quite possibly the best review I've ever read! Thanks for listening man!

[Plankton]

Hey, here's an idea... how about a link to it in the review? Would be totally cool if people started doing that.

[Key]

Originally Posted by Plankton

Hey, here's an idea... how about a link to it in the review? Would be totally cool if people started doing that.

You can find it in the showcase. And in my sig.

[Plankton]

Originally Posted by Ki

You can find it in the showcase. And in my sig.

I know that, but there are other people that don't. It just seems lazy and irresponsible not to include it when reviewing it.

"Hey, I reviewed this entire album. Here's what I think of it. Good luck finding it though..."

[Key]

Originally Posted by Plankton

I know that, but there are other people that don't. It just seems lazy and irresponsible not to include it when reviewing it.

"Hey, I reviewed this entire album. Here's what I think of it. Good luck finding it though..."

I getcha. I usually try to link it when I review.

[Lucem Ferre]

Originally Posted by Plankton

I know that, but there are other people that don't. It just seems lazy and irresponsible not to include it when reviewing it.

"Hey, I reviewed this entire album. Here's what I think of it. Good luck finding it though..."

I actually agree, because that one dude hyped that one album and I wanted to hear it but it wasn't linked.

[Frownland]

Ki you should start calling yourself hashfive.