Why is music so polarizing for so many people?

tbajas · 04-13-2015, 02:54 PM

Hi all, long time reader, first time poster.
This is something that's been on my mind for a few weeks now, and In several hours of searching, I haven't really been able to find an actual discussion on this particular topic. A few weeks back a friend and I were playing videogames on pc, and I was playing some music to help me stay on edge. My friend asked me what I was listening to, and, seeing no reason not to tell him, said "Linkin Park. " At this point my friend, whom I have been able regularly disussed politics, religion, social issues, and generally controversial topics with for years without issue begins asking me why I would listen to such a "terrible band" and insisting that I "get a better taste in music." Now, having been a fan of LP since gradeschool, I'm no stranger to criticism on account of my taste in music. What surprised me, was the fact that my friend, a person who I generally regard as a open minded person, was so adamant in his position that I had a poor taste in music, just because I appreciate a certain artist. I could have just as easily been listening to queen, aerosmith, u2, pink floyd, drake, ice cube, or any of the other hundreds of artists on my hard drive, but that one artist bugged him enough to make him not want to talk to me the remainder of the evening. It quickly occurred to me that this happens near constantly in day to day life. one of my friends picks me and some of his buddies up in his car, one of his friends tell him to turn off "that overplayed classic crap" (Stairway to heaven). Another calls me "gay" for liking the Beach Boys (oh the irony). A listener calls in to complain to the DJ that he played coldplay on an "Alt Rock" station. And on the internet, oh boy, it really comes out (not so much here). I mean, you say "I like artist x," and you'd think you had just insulted everyones ability to think. And god forbid you talk about what a song means to you, because at that point people act as if you just ruined their whole lives. But why?

tl;dr: Why is it that music is so quick to polarize people? It's not like it's politics, there really isn't a need, is there?

**Frownland** · 04-13-2015, 02:56 PM

Whatever people are really passionate about, that thing will be polarizing among some of those people.

Isbjørn · 04-13-2015, 03:15 PM

tl;dr

Nameless · 04-13-2015, 04:08 PM

I think it's kind of a leftover tribal thing. Ways people identify themselves in groups, like with sports teams or geographical areas of origin.

Aux-In · 04-13-2015, 05:20 PM

They say the two things you should never talk about are politics and religion. I believe that the third dimension is music. I'm into the electronic stuff, and it has been extremely eye-opening how polarizing it can be to some people, especially older people. Normally this is the kind of thing reserved for those who don't like rap and country.

I have had very strong, visceral reactions from people where I could literally feel (this is across the Internet, mind you) from users that it caused an extreme emotional reaction in them. I find this fascinating to be honest with you. Again, not just a "I hate that music," but to the point where they were almost in a rage. Like I was attacking them with my music or something. Very bizarre. This, from just a few songs that I had posted, which most people don't even listen to anyway.

EPOCH6 · 04-13-2015, 06:01 PM

People associate music with cultures, ideologies, politics, attitudes, drugs, fashion, personalities, and whole lot of other things. When you don't like music that somebody else likes they might interpret that as you not liking something about them. If all music was to us was sounds in our ear it wouldn't be nearly as psychologically enriching, music hits us like it does because it reminds us of other things, it alludes to other things we like, other feelings we like, it's much more than nicely organised sounds when you filter it through a human brain.

Trollheart · 04-13-2015, 06:06 PM

Well first of all your friend should have, in my opinion, asked "Is that all you listen to?" and then made his comment. If I put on Tom Waits and someone says "That's crap! Why don't you listen to something good like Iron Maiden?" I would happily advise them I'm a big fan. Or if they expound on how great classical music is, I listen to that too. My tastes are relatively wide and varied, and for someone (esp someone I knew for a long time) to denigrate my musical taste on the basis of one artist is I think being very narrow-minded.

Of course, the other response could have been "Well what do YOU listen to?" and start a discussion about that. I think a lot of it stems from a misguided belief among people that their music is superior and this certainly holds true if you can point to a band/artiste reviled generally, such as Nickelback, Slipknot or Taylor Swift etc. I get a lot of stick for loving Bon Jovi: doesn't bother me. Many of my friends are not into my music but it doesn't stop us being friends. If someone is going to get the hump over something as small as that, you probably need to address it with them and say something like "Is it that important? Are we gonna fall out over Linkin ****ing Park?"

Jade_City · 04-13-2015, 06:08 PM

It's not really polarizing, I just think people are too quick to jump on the bandwagon of hate sometimes in order not to be seen as part of the crowd that a lot of people look down upon. No one wants to be left out or picked on, so he just most likely (even subconsciously) decided that you liking Linkin Park was a bad thing. He probably hasn't even listened to them much? So instead of providing a decent argument he just resorted to a petty insult because since like I said, he most likely saw that other people commonly dislike Linkin Park. I'm not a fan of them either but most people who say stuff like that don't really have a proper understanding of music if you ask me.

Also he seems like a ****ty friend if he's gonna not talk to you over something as simple as liking Linkin Park if you ask me, especially after all the stuff you've apparently discussed with him. That's just kinda sad and shallow. The band is not my cup of tea for multiple reasons, but not simply because of what most people say.

grtwhtgrvty · 04-13-2015, 06:53 PM

It's funny because the only thing that's really objective is the aesthetic of the music. That's the only thing that can't really be argued, unless it's from an ignorance vs knowledge perception (or god forbid ignorance vs ignorance).

And the argument of complexity vs simplicity is both objective and subjective, especially since, from an aesthetic standpoint, an artist's music can be simultaneously simplistic and complex.

Let's say you take a single and reverb the **** out of it and layer it until it's this massive wall of sound. That is inherently simple. It's just one, massive sound. Then you add in complex drum patterns, thus rendering it complex as well, which renders the concept of complex vs simplicity arbitrary, even though the aesthetic created is completely, objectively, THAT aesthetic, it's just that looking at it from a complex vs simplicity or complex + simplicity perspective is rather relative.

I do relate to your friend to a certain extent. I think there are varying degrees and many flavors of intelligence. Some of the smartest people I know are not able to grasp music. It's just random sounds to them. I don't know your friend. They could be subjectively judging you and refusing to be your friend, which is immature, or the fact that you don't share his level of refined taste puts a strain on the friendship. If music is a big part of his life, and he can't discuss the intricacies of it with you, it leaves him feeling unfulfilled. I don't know why I'm assuming he is male, but I'm gonna roll with it. I don't necessarily view it as a smart vs stupid thing. I view it moreso like an RPG. There is x number of skills and we all have skill points and those skill points have been allotted into different things depending on our interests. Music and concepts of music and the artistry behind music and aesthetics is a big part of my life, which had given me more points in "Musical Intelligence", thus refining my taste. Based on the massively mainstream artists you listed off, none of which are particularly complex or cutting edge, you don't have that refined of a taste -- which is fine. Maybe that's why your friend is having issues with you. I don't think, for me, that would make or break a friendship, but it would definitely be a huge aspect of my life I wouldn't be able to discuss with them.

Music is the biggest part of my life, and if I learn that my friend, let's call her Anne, only listens to Nicki Minaj and Katy Perry, both incredibly one dimensional artists, that's a huge part of my life that I can't discuss or enjoy with that person. If he wants to talk about Tchaikovsky and you can't meet his standard for refined musical discussion, I can't really blame him for feeling a strain in the relationship because that is an interest of his you can't address.

People say that musical taste should have no baring on who you are friends with, but I think that's bull****, because musical taste is an interest, and you are friends with people that you have interests in common with. If I love Nascar, and I meet someone who is just as into Nascar as I am, and Nascar is totally my favorite thing in the world, we are going to have a better chance of being friends.

Although in my opinion, you sound really immature for being friends with someone who is going to call you gay for liking The Beach Boys. I think that says a lot about you and your level of maturity. I don't know any mature person in the world that would tolerate such a low brow form of expression. That's something a 14 year old would say.

I think your open mindedness got the better of you and caused you to have ****ty friends. I think you should narrow your perception a little bit and find people more suiting to your needs because from the looks of it you have absolutely no standards on friendship.

Mondo Bungle · 04-13-2015, 06:55 PM

^you're gay for liking post-rock

04-13-2015, 02:54 PM	#1 (permalink)
tbajas Groupie Join Date: Apr 2015 Posts: 2	Why is music so polarizing for so many people? Hi all, long time reader, first time poster. This is something that's been on my mind for a few weeks now, and In several hours of searching, I haven't really been able to find an actual discussion on this particular topic. A few weeks back a friend and I were playing videogames on pc, and I was playing some music to help me stay on edge. My friend asked me what I was listening to, and, seeing no reason not to tell him, said "Linkin Park. " At this point my friend, whom I have been able regularly disussed politics, religion, social issues, and generally controversial topics with for years without issue begins asking me why I would listen to such a "terrible band" and insisting that I "get a better taste in music." Now, having been a fan of LP since gradeschool, I'm no stranger to criticism on account of my taste in music. What surprised me, was the fact that my friend, a person who I generally regard as a open minded person, was so adamant in his position that I had a poor taste in music, just because I appreciate a certain artist. I could have just as easily been listening to queen, aerosmith, u2, pink floyd, drake, ice cube, or any of the other hundreds of artists on my hard drive, but that one artist bugged him enough to make him not want to talk to me the remainder of the evening. It quickly occurred to me that this happens near constantly in day to day life. one of my friends picks me and some of his buddies up in his car, one of his friends tell him to turn off "that overplayed classic crap" (Stairway to heaven). Another calls me "gay" for liking the Beach Boys (oh the irony). A listener calls in to complain to the DJ that he played coldplay on an "Alt Rock" station. And on the internet, oh boy, it really comes out (not so much here). I mean, you say "I like artist x," and you'd think you had just insulted everyones ability to think. And god forbid you talk about what a song means to you, because at that point people act as if you just ruined their whole lives. But why? tl;dr: Why is it that music is so quick to polarize people? It's not like it's politics, there really isn't a need, is there? Last edited by tbajas; 04-13-2015 at 03:23 PM.

04-13-2015, 02:56 PM	#2 (permalink)
Frownland SOPHIE FOREVER Join Date: Aug 2011 Location: East of the Southern North American West Posts: 35,541	Whatever people are really passionate about, that thing will be polarizing among some of those people. __________________ Studies show that when a given norm is changed in the face of the unchanging, the remaining contradictions will parallel the truth. d e a f b o x

04-13-2015, 03:15 PM	#3 (permalink)
Isbjørn cooler commie than elph Join Date: Sep 2012 Location: In a hole, help Posts: 2,811	tl;dr __________________ fast(ml) Hear me play the guitar Look, mom! I got a journal

04-13-2015, 05:20 PM	#5 (permalink)
Aux-In Wrinkled Magazine Join Date: Jan 2015 Location: In Time Posts: 467	They say the two things you should never talk about are politics and religion. I believe that the third dimension is music. I'm into the electronic stuff, and it has been extremely eye-opening how polarizing it can be to some people, especially older people. Normally this is the kind of thing reserved for those who don't like rap and country. I have had very strong, visceral reactions from people where I could literally feel (this is across the Internet, mind you) from users that it caused an extreme emotional reaction in them. I find this fascinating to be honest with you. Again, not just a "I hate that music," but to the point where they were almost in a rage. Like I was attacking them with my music or something. Very bizarre. This, from just a few songs that I had posted, which most people don't even listen to anyway. __________________ Reviews l YouTube Playlist: Another Dimension "All over a bowl of bitter beans."

04-13-2015, 06:06 PM	#7 (permalink)
Trollheart Born to be mild Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: 404 Not Found Posts: 26,994	Well first of all your friend should have, in my opinion, asked "Is that all you listen to?" and then made his comment. If I put on Tom Waits and someone says "That's crap! Why don't you listen to something good like Iron Maiden?" I would happily advise them I'm a big fan. Or if they expound on how great classical music is, I listen to that too. My tastes are relatively wide and varied, and for someone (esp someone I knew for a long time) to denigrate my musical taste on the basis of one artist is I think being very narrow-minded. Of course, the other response could have been "Well what do YOU listen to?" and start a discussion about that. I think a lot of it stems from a misguided belief among people that their music is superior and this certainly holds true if you can point to a band/artiste reviled generally, such as Nickelback, Slipknot or Taylor Swift etc. I get a lot of stick for loving Bon Jovi: doesn't bother me. Many of my friends are not into my music but it doesn't stop us being friends. If someone is going to get the hump over something as small as that, you probably need to address it with them and say something like "Is it that important? Are we gonna fall out over Linkin ***ing Park?" __________________ Trollheart: Signature-free since April 2018*

04-13-2015, 04:08 PM	#4 (permalink)
Nameless Fat girls in yoga pants Join Date: Mar 2015 Posts: 152	I think it's kind of a leftover tribal thing. Ways people identify themselves in groups, like with sports teams or geographical areas of origin.

04-13-2015, 06:08 PM	#8 (permalink)
Jade_City Hello! Join Date: May 2014 Location: corner by Jamal's house Posts: 203	It's not really polarizing, I just think people are too quick to jump on the bandwagon of hate sometimes in order not to be seen as part of the crowd that a lot of people look down upon. No one wants to be left out or picked on, so he just most likely (even subconsciously) decided that you liking Linkin Park was a bad thing. He probably hasn't even listened to them much? So instead of providing a decent argument he just resorted to a petty insult because since like I said, he most likely saw that other people commonly dislike Linkin Park. I'm not a fan of them either but most people who say stuff like that don't really have a proper understanding of music if you ask me. Also he seems like a ****ty friend if he's gonna not talk to you over something as simple as liking Linkin Park if you ask me, especially after all the stuff you've apparently discussed with him. That's just kinda sad and shallow. The band is not my cup of tea for multiple reasons, but not simply because of what most people say. __________________ WHERE DID YOU GET THAT THING? FROM THE MOTHERSHIP!

04-13-2015, 06:53 PM	#9 (permalink)
grtwhtgrvty jiojoijoi Join Date: Feb 2015 Posts: 398	It's funny because the only thing that's really objective is the aesthetic of the music. That's the only thing that can't really be argued, unless it's from an ignorance vs knowledge perception (or god forbid ignorance vs ignorance). And the argument of complexity vs simplicity is both objective and subjective, especially since, from an aesthetic standpoint, an artist's music can be simultaneously simplistic and complex. Let's say you take a single and reverb the ** out of it and layer it until it's this massive wall of sound. That is inherently simple. It's just one, massive sound. Then you add in complex drum patterns, thus rendering it complex as well, which renders the concept of complex vs simplicity arbitrary, even though the aesthetic created is completely, objectively, THAT aesthetic, it's just that looking at it from a complex vs simplicity or complex + simplicity perspective is rather relative. I do relate to your friend to a certain extent. I think there are varying degrees and many flavors of intelligence. Some of the smartest people I know are not able to grasp music. It's just random sounds to them. I don't know your friend. They could be subjectively judging you and refusing to be your friend, which is immature, or the fact that you don't share his level of refined taste puts a strain on the friendship. If music is a big part of his life, and he can't discuss the intricacies of it with you, it leaves him feeling unfulfilled. I don't know why I'm assuming he is male, but I'm gonna roll with it. I don't necessarily view it as a smart vs stupid thing. I view it moreso like an RPG. There is x number of skills and we all have skill points and those skill points have been allotted into different things depending on our interests. Music and concepts of music and the artistry behind music and aesthetics is a big part of my life, which had given me more points in "Musical Intelligence", thus refining my taste. Based on the massively mainstream artists you listed off, none of which are particularly complex or cutting edge, you don't have that refined of a taste -- which is fine. Maybe that's why your friend is having issues with you. I don't think, for me, that would make or break a friendship, but it would definitely be a huge aspect of my life I wouldn't be able to discuss with them. Music is the biggest part of my life, and if I learn that my friend, let's call her Anne, only listens to Nicki Minaj and Katy Perry, both incredibly one dimensional artists, that's a huge part of my life that I can't discuss or enjoy with that person. If he wants to talk about Tchaikovsky and you can't meet his standard for refined musical discussion, I can't really blame him for feeling a strain in the relationship because that is an interest of his you can't address. People say that musical taste should have no baring on who you are friends with, but I think that's bull, because musical taste is an interest, and you are friends with people that you have interests in common with. If I love Nascar, and I meet someone who is just as into Nascar as I am, and Nascar is totally my favorite thing in the world, we are going to have a better chance of being friends. Although in my opinion, you sound really immature for being friends with someone who is going to call you gay for liking The Beach Boys. I think that says a lot about you and your level of maturity. I don't know any mature person in the world that would tolerate such a low brow form of expression. That's something a 14 year old would say. I think your open mindedness got the better of you and caused you to have **ty friends. I think you should narrow your perception a little bit and find people more suiting to your needs because from the looks of it you have absolutely no standards on friendship.