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View Poll Results: Best Instrument Eva
Keytar 1 20.00%
Keytar 0 0%
Keytar 1 20.00%
Keytar 3 60.00%
Voters: 5. You may not vote on this poll

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Old 07-21-2010, 10:19 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Angry The Keytar is the World's Most Underrated Musical Instrument

I am a world renown keytarist and I do not get the respect I deserve! The keytar is a fine instrument and is very difficult to play! You pussy keyboardists and organists sit on your fat asses while I have to jam out and keep the crowd into it. You can't just sit there with the keytar, you have to move!

My patented move is a no-hands macarena (WHILE ROCKING THE KEYTAR). If that doesn't get the crowd working, I will resort to the gopher's dance form caddyshack. WORKS EVERY TIME!

Also, my traveling keytar band is looking for an oboist. PM me if interested.

As i am overweight, sometimes, I have to have a fellow band member pull my pants up from the half-moon position on stage. This means you oboist - the oboe is a bitch instrument and is subservient to the keytar.

I don't make up the instrument pecking order, god did when he invented keytars and oboes. Sorry oboe player, it's in the bible - look it up.
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Old 07-21-2010, 10:25 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Keytars sync - you suck if you play the keytar.

I'll bet you think you got some good Poonannie back in the day because of it, but the 80's are OVER, Poindexter.

I'll bet you could beat out a "refreshing" take on Woser Time with that, eh?

Queer *** Jew bitch.
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Old 07-21-2010, 10:25 PM   #3 (permalink)
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Gotta agree on this one. Always been a big fan, didn't think many others agreed with me. Do you have a favorite player? Mikey McPizza and Hagar Wolf always put on a great show, probably my 2 favorite players.
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Old 07-21-2010, 10:30 PM   #4 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by T. Bagger View Post
Gotta agree on this one. Always been a big fan, didn't think many others agreed with me. Do you have a favorite player? Mikey McPizza and Hagar Wolf always put on a great show, probably my 2 favorite players.


You know, I never was much on McPizza's keytar stylings...dude can wail on the ukalele, though.

Now Hagar Wolf, on the other hand...
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Old 07-21-2010, 10:34 PM   #5 (permalink)
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Keytars sync - you suck if you play the keytar.

I'll bet you think you got some good Poonannie back in the day because of it, but the 80's are OVER, Poindexter.

I'll bet you could beat out a "refreshing" take on Woser Time with that, eh?

Queer *** Jew bitch.
Come see my show at my cousin Berry's son's bris and we'll see if the keytar sucks!

I rock that ****! I was voted best keytarist in high-school and got to feel up Debbie Upchurch because of my rockin' performance and would have gotten to third base if she hadn't kicked me in my coinpurse and run off!
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Old 07-21-2010, 10:50 PM   #6 (permalink)
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Come see my show at my cousin Berry's son's bris and we'll see if the keytar sucks!

I rock that ****! I was voted best keytarist in high-school and got to feel up Debbie Upchurch because of my rockin' performance and would have gotten to third base if she hadn't kicked me in my coinpurse and run off!

I'll be at your cousin's best friend's uncle's brother's son's bris, and if you dint play the best version of the Final Countdown ever hard, then I'm gonna kick you in the coinpurse just like that slizzutty porker Debbie Upchurch.
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Old 07-21-2010, 10:53 PM   #7 (permalink)
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Come see my show at my cousin Berry's son's bris and we'll see if the keytar sucks!

I rock that ****! I was voted best keytarist in high-school and got to feel up Debbie Upchurch because of my rockin' performance and would have gotten to third base if she hadn't kicked me in my coinpurse and run off!
Where are you located? I would love to catch your show at the bris, though I'm not really supposed to be around children.
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Old 07-21-2010, 10:59 PM   #8 (permalink)
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Where are you located? I would love to catch your show at the bris, though I'm not really supposed to be around children.
Sheboygan.

My band also plays the sheboygan community center talent competition. Next week we're totally going to play an entire song without getting booed off stage!
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Old 07-21-2010, 11:16 PM   #9 (permalink)
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Where are you located? I would love to catch your show at the bris, though I'm not really supposed to be around children.
Well, I just hope you use a condom.
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Old 07-21-2010, 11:17 PM   #10 (permalink)
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Sheboygan.

My band also plays the sheboygan community center talent competition. Next week we're totally going to play an entire song without getting booed off stage!

Ahh, Wisconsin...

It all makes sense now.
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