Various Artists slaughter "Everybody Hurts" for Haiti

[Rickenbacker]

I heard on NPR today that internationally known D-bag Simon Cowell of American Idol and X Factor fame had orchestrated a cover of the 1992 R.E.M. classic "Everybody Hurts" by some "famous" artists to raise money for Haiti, a la We Are the World. Of course I had to check it out and by god is it the worst thing I have ever heard? Pretty damn close. As I listened to Mariah Carey slaughter some of the most endearingly beautiful lyrics ever with her "talent", the heartbreaking memories I once associated with the song dissappeared, only to be replaced with even worse memories of Bon Jovi fucking up a great song. Well done Mr. Cowell! You have succeeded in commercializing one of my favorite childhood songs and you did it with conviction! Gone is the naive innocence of Stipe's technically imperfect but emotionally flawless vocal. Gone are Mike Mill's song-making harmonies. Gone is everything about this song that once made it great. I do hope the Athens, G.A. boys are having a good laugh about this one, because I certainly am not.


Thoughts on this travesty?