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Old 06-12-2015, 01:11 AM   #1 (permalink)
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Dear Batlord,

Jesus Christ, you have 10,000+ posts and none of them are worth reading.
Your avatar choices always suck.
You have girly colors for your signature. You're not edgy.
Nobody cares about comic books.
Your mom called me back, she told me to slap you in the face.
Update your journals.
Stop sending me nudes. I'm not interested. The restraining order I sent you says just that.
My cat pukes when I say your name out loud.
Grow a beard. Shave it. Then grow another one. Be a man.
Lick my feet.

Sincerely,
Ki
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Old 06-12-2015, 01:32 AM   #2 (permalink)
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Dear Batlord,

Ever considered wearing chaps?
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Old 06-12-2015, 02:04 AM   #3 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ki View Post
Dear Batlord,

Jesus Christ, you have 10,000+ posts and none of them are worth reading.
Your avatar choices always suck.
You have girly colors for your signature. You're not edgy.
Nobody cares about comic books.
Your mom called me back, she told me to slap you in the face.
Update your journals.
Stop sending me nudes. I'm not interested. The restraining order I sent you says just that.
My cat pukes when I say your name out loud.
Grow a beard. Shave it. Then grow another one. Be a man.
Lick my feet.

Sincerely,
Ki
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Quote:
Originally Posted by J.R.R. Tolkien
There is only one bright spot and that is the growing habit of disgruntled men of dynamiting factories and power-stations; I hope that, encouraged now as ‘patriotism’, may remain a habit! But it won’t do any good, if it is not universal.
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Old 06-12-2015, 11:12 AM   #4 (permalink)
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You love the attention.
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Old 06-12-2015, 12:43 PM   #5 (permalink)
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You love the attention.
I just found those two statements to be contradictory. Like the fact that you're you, and yet you have a girlfriend.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by J.R.R. Tolkien
There is only one bright spot and that is the growing habit of disgruntled men of dynamiting factories and power-stations; I hope that, encouraged now as ‘patriotism’, may remain a habit! But it won’t do any good, if it is not universal.
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Old 06-12-2015, 12:46 PM   #6 (permalink)
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Dear Batlord,
Listen to The Residents and love Primus.
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Studies show that when a given norm is changed in the face of the unchanging, the remaining contradictions will parallel the truth.
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Old 06-12-2015, 12:52 PM   #7 (permalink)
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Dear Batlord,

Your insessent peering into my windows at the witching hour gives me the creeps.
I'm tired of you using my all my beauty products and my towel.Stop leaving the kitchen light on and for the record I don't want those jeans back.

All my love
Stalked in Sarasota.

PS. Plankton thinks you're getting a bit hippy.
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Roxy is unable to perpetrate violence. It always somehow turns into BDSM between two consenting adults.
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I just want to say your tits are lovely.
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Roxy is the William S. Burroughs of our time.
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I like Roxy, she's awesome and her taste in music far exceeds yours. Roxy is in the Major League bro, and you're like a sad clown in a two bit rodeo.
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Old 06-12-2015, 12:56 PM   #8 (permalink)
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Dear Batlord,

It's not gonna suck itself
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On this one your voice is kind of weird but really intense and awesome
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Old 06-12-2015, 03:29 PM   #9 (permalink)
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Dear Batlord,

If a person is attracted to feet, are they a pediphile?
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Old 06-12-2015, 04:42 PM   #10 (permalink)
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Dear Batlord,

If a person is attracted to feet, are they a pediphile?
Dear Norway Jose,

Nah, they're just gross.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by J.R.R. Tolkien
There is only one bright spot and that is the growing habit of disgruntled men of dynamiting factories and power-stations; I hope that, encouraged now as ‘patriotism’, may remain a habit! But it won’t do any good, if it is not universal.
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