You know you're Australian when...

Astronomer · 06-17-2009, 07:49 AM

I don't know if there are many Aussies on here but I just sent this to my sister to cheer her up while she's overseas so I thought I'd post it anyway

You know you’re Australian when….

1. You’ve made a bong out of your garden hose rather than use it for something illegal such as watering the garden.

2. You know how to abbreviate every word, all of which usually end in -o: arvo, combo, garbo, kero, lezzo, metho, milko, muso, rego, servo, smoko, speedo, righto etc.

3. You know that backyard cricket is a nice way to bond with family and the rubbish bin. And your biggest family argument during the summer was over the rules - one hand one bounce rule, no LBWs, and over the fence is out.

4. You feel obliged to spread salty black stuff that looks like congealed motor oil on bread… and actually grow to like it. You’ve also squeezed Vegemite through Vita Wheats to make little Vegemite worms.

5. You've had an argument with your mate over whether Ford or Holden makes the better car.

6. Barbecues are a regular occurrence.

7. You understand that the phrase “a group of women wearing black thongs” refers to footwear and may be less alluring than it sounds.

8. You can translate: “Dazza and Shazza played Acca Dacca on the way to Maccas.”

9. You know it's not summer until the steering wheel scalds your fingertips, and 46 degrees (115 fahrenheit) days are not uncommon in most states.

10. You think “Woolloomooloo” is a perfectly reasonable name for a place.

11. You believe a hamburger tastes a whole lot better with beetroot.

12. You believe that the more you shorten someone’s name the more you like them.

13. You're secretly proud of our killer wildlife.

14. Working at a bar, you understand male customers will feel the need to offer an excuse whenever they order low-alcohol beer.

15. You know the metric system is way better than any other.

16. You know, whatever the tourist books say, that no one says “cobber" "sheila" or "let's put another prawn on the barbie."

17. You know that snow is a memorable and freakish occurrence. Sometimes it’s even fake.

18. You know that there is a universal place called “woop woop” located in the middle of nowhere… no matter where you actually are.

19. You know that none of us actually drink Fosters beer, because it tastes like shit. But we let the world think we do anyway because the joke’s on them.

20. You will always see Kylie as that girl off Neighbours.

21. If you’re a pedestrian and cars are stopped at a red light, you will fearlessly cross the street in front of them. ‘Hit and runs’ just aren’t cricket. Because Aussies stick together.

22. You know that Sydney or Melbourne should be the capital, because Canberra is a hole.

23. You know that Americans think we’re all Steve Irwin clones. And crikey, they couldn’t be more wrong.

24. You know that certain words must, by law, be shouted out during any rendition of the Angels' song Am I Ever Gonna See Your Face Again.

25. You’ve ever used the words - tops, ripper, sick, mad, rad, sweet - to mean good. And then you place “bloody” in front of it when you REALLY mean it.

26. You know what it's like to swallow a fly, on occasion via your nose.

27. You’ve sucked your tea/coffee/Milo through a Tim Tam.

28. You see people walking bare-foot on the sidewalk and don’t scorn…. because you’re doing it too.

29. You have a story that somehow involves an excessive consumption of booze and a mate named Davo… but you can’t remember.

30. You know that the value of a public holiday is measured in terms of alcohol. God bless the queen and her 4-day birthday.

**Janszoon** · 06-17-2009, 07:52 AM

31. You fall off the Earth because you were crazy enough to think you could walk on the bottom of it.

Astronomer · 06-17-2009, 07:55 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Janszoon

31. You fall off the Earth because you were crazy enough to think you could walk on the bottom of it.

lol

AshleighJane · 06-17-2009, 08:01 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by shiseido red

1. You’ve made a bong out of your garden hose rather than use it for something illegal such as watering the garden.

lol hell yes that is what i am talking about

Fruitonica · 06-17-2009, 08:47 AM

This is a surprisingly good list. I ticked 27.

Quote:

29. You have a story that somehow involves an excessive consumption of booze and a mate named Davo… but you can’t remember.

This fits me so well. Every party I go to there is some idiot called Davo who thinks we're best mates - but fuck if I know how he knows me, and I can't stand the guy...

khfreek · 06-17-2009, 08:12 PM

32. A dingo ate your baby.

Couldn't resist really...

anticipation · 06-17-2009, 08:14 PM

wtf is holden?

is that a car company?

Comus · 06-17-2009, 08:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fruitonica

This is a surprisingly good list. I ticked 27.

Haha yeah me too, and I haven't lived in Australia for years, loved the read

Also the capital should clearly be Perth. And Holden clearly make the best cars.

Astronomer · 06-17-2009, 08:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Comus

Haha yeah me too, and I haven't lived in Australia for years, loved the read

Also the capital should clearly be Perth. And Holden clearly make the best cars.

YES, my favourite band come from Perth. And Holdens do make the best cars (I have a VR Commodore, most Australian car ever

)

jackhammer · 06-18-2009, 08:04 AM

19.

No I KNOW that Fosters' takes like piss

06-17-2009, 07:49 AM	#1 (permalink)
Astronomer we are stardust Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: Australia Posts: 2,894	You know you're Australian when... I don't know if there are many Aussies on here but I just sent this to my sister to cheer her up while she's overseas so I thought I'd post it anyway You know you’re Australian when…. 1. You’ve made a bong out of your garden hose rather than use it for something illegal such as watering the garden. 2. You know how to abbreviate every word, all of which usually end in -o: arvo, combo, garbo, kero, lezzo, metho, milko, muso, rego, servo, smoko, speedo, righto etc. 3. You know that backyard cricket is a nice way to bond with family and the rubbish bin. And your biggest family argument during the summer was over the rules - one hand one bounce rule, no LBWs, and over the fence is out. 4. You feel obliged to spread salty black stuff that looks like congealed motor oil on bread… and actually grow to like it. You’ve also squeezed Vegemite through Vita Wheats to make little Vegemite worms. 5. You've had an argument with your mate over whether Ford or Holden makes the better car. 6. Barbecues are a regular occurrence. 7. You understand that the phrase “a group of women wearing black thongs” refers to footwear and may be less alluring than it sounds. 8. You can translate: “Dazza and Shazza played Acca Dacca on the way to Maccas.” 9. You know it's not summer until the steering wheel scalds your fingertips, and 46 degrees (115 fahrenheit) days are not uncommon in most states. 10. You think “Woolloomooloo” is a perfectly reasonable name for a place. 11. You believe a hamburger tastes a whole lot better with beetroot. 12. You believe that the more you shorten someone’s name the more you like them. 13. You're secretly proud of our killer wildlife. 14. Working at a bar, you understand male customers will feel the need to offer an excuse whenever they order low-alcohol beer. 15. You know the metric system is way better than any other. 16. You know, whatever the tourist books say, that no one says “cobber" "sheila" or "let's put another prawn on the barbie." 17. You know that snow is a memorable and freakish occurrence. Sometimes it’s even fake. 18. You know that there is a universal place called “woop woop” located in the middle of nowhere… no matter where you actually are. 19. You know that none of us actually drink Fosters beer, because it tastes like shit. But we let the world think we do anyway because the joke’s on them. 20. You will always see Kylie as that girl off Neighbours. 21. If you’re a pedestrian and cars are stopped at a red light, you will fearlessly cross the street in front of them. ‘Hit and runs’ just aren’t cricket. Because Aussies stick together. 22. You know that Sydney or Melbourne should be the capital, because Canberra is a hole. 23. You know that Americans think we’re all Steve Irwin clones. And crikey, they couldn’t be more wrong. 24. You know that certain words must, by law, be shouted out during any rendition of the Angels' song Am I Ever Gonna See Your Face Again. 25. You’ve ever used the words - tops, ripper, sick, mad, rad, sweet - to mean good. And then you place “bloody” in front of it when you REALLY mean it. 26. You know what it's like to swallow a fly, on occasion via your nose. 27. You’ve sucked your tea/coffee/Milo through a Tim Tam. 28. You see people walking bare-foot on the sidewalk and don’t scorn…. because you’re doing it too. 29. You have a story that somehow involves an excessive consumption of booze and a mate named Davo… but you can’t remember. 30. You know that the value of a public holiday is measured in terms of alcohol. God bless the queen and her 4-day birthday. __________________ Last edited by Astronomer; 06-17-2009 at 07:58 AM.

06-17-2009, 07:52 AM	#2 (permalink)
Janszoon Mate, Spawn & Die Join Date: May 2007 Location: The Rapping Community Posts: 24,593	31. You fall off the Earth because you were crazy enough to think you could walk on the bottom of it. __________________ A Night in the Life of the Invisible Man Time & Place 25 Albums You Should Hear Before the Moon Crashes into the Earth and We All Die last.fm

06-17-2009, 08:12 PM	#6 (permalink)
khfreek What a guy Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: Brentwood, TN Posts: 2,123	32. A dingo ate your baby. Couldn't resist really... __________________ last.fm

06-18-2009, 08:04 AM	#10 (permalink)
jackhammer Ba and Be. Join Date: May 2007 Location: This Is England Posts: 17,331	19. No I KNOW that Fosters' takes like piss __________________ It be my music and film collection. “A cynic by experience, a romantic by inclination and now a hero by necessity.”

06-17-2009, 08:14 PM	#7 (permalink)
anticipation Music Addict Join Date: Jun 2005 Posts: 3,565	wtf is holden? is that a car company?