Granted but its a pool of you own semen that you wake up face down in after a drunken night of questionable debauchery.

I wish I had a clue

Granted but its a clue to a question no one cares about.

I wish Robert Fripp's Les Paul.

Granted, but that wasn't a wish.

I wish I could walk on my hands.

Granted, but the floor is covered in duct tape.

I wish I could find God.

Granted. But you die the next day and go to hell.

I wish I was finished with school.

Granted, but you cant get a decent job and have to move in with this guy:
http://blogs.pitch.com/plog/ugly-man...-men-women.jpg

As I was going up the stair
I saw a man who wasn't there
He wasn't there again today
I wish, I wish, he'd go away

Granted, and in the place of that man is now a random juggalo.

I wish I was Ryan Reynolds (For the purpose of sexual intercourse with his wife Scarlett Johannson).

Granted, but as it turns out Scarlett's a man after all.
I wish I was Ryan Reynolds.

Granted, but as it turns out you have incurable erectile dysfunction.

I wish I was Ryan Reynolds.

Granted, but its a different Ryan Reynolds than this:
http://www.kerrianne.org/wp-content/...eynolds_97.jpg

I wish I had a Rickenbacker.