Howard the Duck

my uncle is a sort of spiritual medium to Taoist-Buddhist gods and he advised my mother that I shouldn't go to funerals as it would upset my "lifeline"

i believe in that even though I'm a Christian

so I have a valid excuse NOT to attend funerals - unless it'ss inevitable like my granny as I was the eldest grandson on the male lineage - even then, Taoist-Buddhist funerals tend to be quite fun - there's a lot of atonal dissonant music and bizarre chanting