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05-22-2006, 07:07 AM
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#321 (permalink) |
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Uhh-I am Octiposter-huhuh
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: South Florida
Posts: 232
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Your momma's so old she lost her virginity to Jesus.
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Be not ashamed of mistakes and thus make them crimes.-Confucius Talking much about oneself can also be a means to conceal oneself.-Friedrich Nietzsche Now hatred is by far the longest pleasure; men love in haste but they detest at leisure.-Lord Byron Popularity's bad for you. I avoid it like the plague.-Brian Mulrooney |
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05-22-2006, 07:20 AM
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#322 (permalink) |
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Atchin' Akai
Join Date: May 2005
Location: Unamerica
Posts: 8,723
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A Catholic priest and a Rabbi are standing on a streetcorner. A little boy walks by. The priest nudges the Rabbi and whispers, "Hey! Let's screw him!" The Rabbi looks confused and asks, "Outta what?"
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05-22-2006, 08:07 AM
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#325 (permalink) | |
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Atchin' Akai
Join Date: May 2005
Location: Unamerica
Posts: 8,723
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Quote:
Blonde joke... A blonde calls her boyfriend on the phone with a problem. "What's the matter?" he asks. "Well, I've bought this jigsaw puzzle, but it's too hard. None of the pieces fit together and I can't find any edges." "What's the picture of?", he asks. "It's of a big rooster", she replies. "All right," he says, "I'll come over and have a look." When he arrives, she thanks him for coming over and leads him over to the kitchen table where she has it laid out. He takes one look at what she's been struggling with and says, "Oh, for fuck's sake, put the cornflakes back in the box!" |
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05-22-2006, 09:38 AM
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#326 (permalink) | |
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Uhh-I am Octiposter-huhuh
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: South Florida
Posts: 232
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Quote:
 Check it out, this is old but.... This blonde lady gets fired for screwing middle management for a job. A couple days later, she goes and aplies for a job at a Tickle Me Elmo factory right outside her town. She gets an interview and after some "debating" the foreman hires her. He explains her job to her and tells her to start Monday. Monday rolls around, the foreman's doing some paper work in his office. One of the floor supervisors bursts into his office, "Boss, we got a problom!" "What is it?" "You gotta see this." the supervisor says half laughing. Now the foreman's intrigued, so he goes out to have a look. He sees Elmos piled up all over the floor! The supervisor leads him to the source of the problom, and they find the new blonde sitting in a chair with Elmos piled up everywhere around her, a big ball of red yarn, some red cloth and a huge sac of marbles. They watch as she takes two marbles, wraps them in the cloth and sows 'em to the dolls. The foreman explodes laughing! After a minute or so she's baffled and asks, "What's wrong?" The foreman still giggling replies, "You misunderstood me! I said give Elmo two test-tickles!"
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Be not ashamed of mistakes and thus make them crimes.-Confucius Talking much about oneself can also be a means to conceal oneself.-Friedrich Nietzsche Now hatred is by far the longest pleasure; men love in haste but they detest at leisure.-Lord Byron Popularity's bad for you. I avoid it like the plague.-Brian Mulrooney |
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05-30-2006, 10:46 PM
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#327 (permalink) |
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I love Puck
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: British Columbia
Posts: 4,614
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Soo this isnt offensive but i dont care..
Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread !!!
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We are entirely smooth, We admit to the truth, We are the best at what we do.
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05-30-2006, 11:05 PM
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#329 (permalink) | |
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isfckingdead
Join Date: Nov 2004
Posts: 18,967
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 Hahahhahahahhahahah Oh god, scott that was gold.
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