Music Banter - The Music Banter Members' Journals Monthly Update Thread

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Glad to hear you're getting back to it man. I read the latest instalment this morning; great stuff. Mind you, I thought the driver was taking her somewhere, not just away from the convent to be dumped? Ah well, guess I'll find out in the next post.

Oh, and thanks to your efforts you've made your way onto the league table, to be published later tonight! :thumb:

Update for week ending June 23 2013

Well, one week on from our first league table and it would seem any excitement has died down, as we have not that many updates to report this week. Nevertheless, some people worked very hard on theirs so let's talk about them.

Antonio is first up, where he's looking at Butthole ..... Surfers! Also two songs he's diggin', so surely something of interest in there for anyone?

You can always rely on the Batlord to put in a good shift, and indeed this week he does not disappoint. I'm delighted and thrilled to tell you that http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...t-schemes.html is back open for business after a short hiatus, and we're being treated to his next metal epic. Check it out now cos it's gonna be a great one! He's up to page 42 and 43 in http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...-fidelity.html, with music coming from Katrina and the Waves and the Righteous Brothers, while he's still fully into his punk kick in http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...lks-about.html, with bands like the Dils, the Zeros and Crime. You want it loud and angry? This is the place to be!

Horray! Engine has responded to my plea in last week's Showcase, so we get another chapter in http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...can-dream.html --- great to see ya back!

Gavin B, of course, never went away, and when you're cataloguing http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...use-songs.html it's some inventory! This week he's got videos of rock stars before they were famous, including Page and Hendrix, a review of the movie "Brassed off" and a forgotten classic album by Johnny Thunders. Don't forget to wear your hi-viz: health and safety at all times. Watch out for the forklifts!

Powerstars is introducing "The Song Overthinker". No idea what that is? Step this way! http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...sicalness.html

Stephen is looking at Models --- no, a band called Models, not swimsuit glamour ... well, you know, he could be. It's his life. But not here. http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...-observer.html observes music and related articles. Not porn. He probably does that on a different computer, like I do --- ah, I've said too much. Ahem. Moving on...

Screen13 is riding high in our league table, and is it any wonder with a journal like http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...all-music.html? This week he's introducing us to another double album that failed to cut it n the USA.

That takes us to me, and what have I been up to? Well, in http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...d-journal.html I'm continuing my fourth part of the NWOBHM series, this time with Girlschool and, soon, very soon, Diamond Head. Also shaking the walls with Megadeth's "Rust in peace" in http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...i-reviews.html while http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...-emporium.html has two more episodes from Supernatural, as we edge closer to the end of season one. That just leaves http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...ver-heard.html, with offerings from Kate Bush and The White Stripes.

Unknown Soldier looks at Thin Lizzy in his "double header" in http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...y-history.html

while Urban is still trawling through the "NOW!" series in http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...nal-stuff.html

leaving YorkeDaddy to close the show, with another look at Nine Inch Nails for him in http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...used-hate.html. Will he change his mind? You'll have to read his journal to see...

This week's Showcase comes from a man who not only can write but is a wicked guitarist too. Yeah, the man currently out on the ocean wave with his gal, the one, the only
http://www.musicbanter.com/avatars/5...ine=1371135438
Plankton's journal has generally followed the concept of his rise to glory as a rock star (oops! Sorry! Time machine? What time machine? No, no! I have not returned from the future. Just forget everything you just heard okay?) --- I mean, his beginning to learn to play guitar and how he honed his craft. It's a fascinating read. Here's a bit:

Quote:

Originally Posted by Plankton (Post 1212180)

Chapter 1 - Talk About Yer Rabbit Holes... (continued)

After the warden parolled me some months later, I found myself seeking out friends with guitars. One such friend had exactly what I needed. His name was Paul, and he had an older brother who played bass in a gigging band. Paul had a Fender Strat, and he played quite well, which was inspiration for me to go over to his house after school and wait my turn as he pulled out licks from Funk 49, and Green Grass and High Tides:

...which infuriated me.

Dammit! I wanted to be the one in the spotlight! I wanted to hold that power in my hands! As Paul expended all his licks and knowledge of the fretboard to the delight of everyone but me, he'd finally get around to setting his guitar down for a rest. This was my chance! He's not looking, he's too involved with that hot little number over in the corner. I grabbed at his Strat, fumbled a bit and stood there holding a guitar in my hands for the first time in my life.

I was frozen. Not only from having looked up and found everyone in the room looking directly at me, but at the thought of me not knowing one. Single. Note.

I made an effort to keep what little reputation I had as one of the cool kids (in my mind anyway), and made the extremely bad decision to try and play something. Anything. I plunked out two or three sour notes right about the time Paul caught me out of the corner of his eye and made a dash for me and his guitar. I quickly returned the Strat to it's home on the stand and sat back down, only to find Paul picking it back up so he could show off how those notes should "Properly" be played. I went home that night early. Early enough that dinner wasn't even ready yet, and I wasn't grounded... although I'd wished I had been.

And now it's time for this month's
http://www.trollheart.com/crypt2.png

I know he seemed to indicate that he was getting depressed about his writing and in all likelihood we're probably not going to hear again from
http://www.musicbanter.com/avatars/2...ine=1217048730
but I hope we've not seen the last of Mr Dave. In a similar vein to Plankton's above, his journal catalogued his experiences both in creating his own music, and with regard to his father, who was by all accounts a minor recording star. His stories were always interesting and engaging, and hell, I miss the guy! This is the kind of thing he used to write. We can only hope he'll one day pick up his keyboard again and regale us with more http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...-jam-room.html!
(Question, which for some reason didn't copy, is "What are you going to do with your life?")

Quote:

Originally Posted by mr dave (Post 1158684)

http://goldenageofmusicvideo.com/wp-...4056205332.jpg
… or maybe not.

While the correct answer to that question will always be “I WANNA ROCK!” the truth is… hell if I know. There’s something offsetting to me in seeing a middle aged person trying to rock out like it still matters; whether it’s a complete refusal to let go of the styles and sounds of their youth, or the lame creepiness of being a 40 something still holding fast to being 21 and obsessing with the latest pop star drama, it’s just a little off for me. It’s like a comment I got on this site once about how cool it was that I was a 30 something who still puffed weed everyday and liked making shoegaze music, I don’t think it was meant as a back handed insult but it still made me feel like a stunted adult.

That’s not to say that I think there’s an age limit to particular styles of music as much as there definitely seems to be a correlation with the attention given to certain aspects of pop culture within certain stages of personal development. I’d go so far as to say adolescent rebellion is one of the most substantial phases of personal development within youths today, it’s when and how a young person differentiates themselves from their parents and really starts getting a true sense of individuality. For the most part (especially in the western world) rock/pop music is the soundtrack to that rebellion, it means so much to so many because I think for a lot of young people it’s their first taste of a grown up communicating at them like individuals rather than children - especially since the 80s. It provides the child with another perceived voice of authority and provides them with alternative options on how to deal with daily conflicts. Whether it’s some pop garbage talking about trends, or some heartfelt reflection of the soul is irrelevant so long as the young listener feels an impact.

The problem occurs when you get people who don’t recognize the underlying reason for the appeal and run with the belief that the personal pop culture of their youth IS the superior one that shouldn’t ever have to be remixed by the mainstream. Whatever, they’re the same kind of people who’d complain about Amy Winehouse getting added to the 27 club but were defending Kurt Cobain against the exact same ‘logic’ back in their own heyday. I don’t think we all need to become cranky old curmudgeons, but at the same time I sure as hell don’t want to be a frat boy forever.

Having said all that, if rock music is the soundtrack to adolescent rebellion – how do you rebel against a rock musician?

I’m still not sure, but ultimately, it doesn’t matter anymore. It’s kind of like a magic trick, once you understand how it works it’s not special anymore, it just doesn’t matter. In my case, it was owning up to the realization that I was abusing music as a way of getting back at the old man. I know I’ve got ‘potential’, not enough to sell millions of records and tour the world but enough to have other people pick up and comment on it - I spent years burying that potential under a mess of noisy improvisations. Problem being, I was blind to the fact that I was actually following rather closely to his early path.

I don’t have that many memories of seeing my old man in action, in fact I only ever remember seeing him actually perform once (some promo gig in the mid 80s for a local tv spot). What little I do remember form back in the day were rehearsals and the unbelievable boredom within – STOP! START IT OVER AT THE CHORUS AND GO THROUGH THE BRIDGE! GOTTA GET IT TIGHT! 2-3-4! GO!... ALRIGHT! NOW FROM THE TOP!

…. Oh. My. God. It was so boring. I remember being like 5 and thinking ‘Why can’t you guys just rock out? Why do you have to keep stopping every time it starts getting good?’ Soooooo boring, and 20 years later, I had no intentions on reliving that shenanigan, or creating a new stage for some sycophants to latch onto. In my mind his music was lame and corporate, his focus on commercial success and his discipline towards the quality of their sound just turned me off. Turns out that boring level of discipline is kind of exactly what you need if you want to be taken halfway seriously as an actual professional working musician, and if you intend to pay your bills without having to work some lame day job you’d better believe you need to approach performing with the same attitude as a corporate professional.

But… I’m a hard headed idiot, so rather than learn specifics I worked off my assumptions. Here’s the kicker though, a lot of my initial rebellious attitudes were not only seen as correct and viable but actually encouraged; we were NOT supposed to want to emulate the past, as grunge kids we were NOT supposed to openly want commercial success. And with peers that shared those initial attitudes it took me a long while to recognize how foolish I was being and how closely I was actually following the path we all thought we had turned our backs on.

I’ll cut this rambling here for now, but I’m sure I’ll come back to this topic for further introspection in the future.

----------------------

Anyone who’s ever paid attention to my posts when it came to the Red Hot Chili Peppers, classic songs, or major influences knew this song was coming. This is the lightning bolt that refried my brain after it froze up following the breakdown of my family.

Everything about this track is badass, from sounds to sights I’ve never seen anything quite like it before or since. I’d seen other bands who looked all freaky and punkish but the hardcore styles I’d hear as a result didn’t appeal to me. I’d heard other bands who sounded kind of funky like that but never without a bunch of keyboards and shoulder pads (it was the 80s after all). Ultimately everything I’d heard before the Chili Peppers got compared to some imaginary line I’d established through my old man. Then again when all you heard was 80s AOR radio rock like Don Henley or Phil Collins or Journey or Foreigner it’s easy to think that most music is boring grown up stuff.

Jungle Man is not boring grown up stuff.

That bass line entered my head the same way you’d swing a baseball bat into a bag of garbage - it splattered ALL OVER THE PLACE before Hillel’s guitar scooped it all up into a new container. I remember laying on the floor in the living room at my aunt’s house doing homework, and then stopping completely, mouth agape, entirely possessed by what I was seeing and hearing on the tv. It’s the first time I remember recognizing the popular value of a piece of media completely independently of any other factors.

In fact I got social pressure from my peers to distance myself from the band because ‘they were gay’ in the days before Under the Bridge becoming a hit and making it ‘ok’ to like the band. Looking back this attitude is definitely one of the factors in my frustration with musicians who would talk about their ideals on how to create music but wouldn’t actually be willing to attempt any sort of public display of those ideals until another group has proven the viability of the action through their own means. I mean, really, if WE did it first someone might laugh at us, and we certainly don’t want to be risking a little ridicule in light of being potentially seen as innovators, no sir.

This song is also the first time I WANTED to play guitar, though I also remember thinking I wanted to play guitar because I’d never be cool enough to play bass like what I’d just heard. Though in reality…
---------------------------------------
---------4-----------------4-----------
---------------------------------------
--0h2--X---2--0----0h2--X---2--0--2--
… is a pretty easy bass groove.

My other big thing for the Chili Peppers is all the indirect influence they had on me. I’d pick up any magazine I could find that featured an interview with Flea and whatever guitarist they had at the time and in every interview I learned something more about either playing music or other musicians. Again this is something that the proliferation of the internet has changed immensely. You don’t need to wait for a new magazine to be printed to learn a bit more about a person or their influences, you don’t need to make a list of people to check out in the future when all you need to do now is clear off enough hard drive space prior to clicking on the discography download. But back in the day those magazine interviews could provide real substance and I was lucky that Flea always took advantage of those opportunities to discuss some of his favourite musicians with the hopes that kids like me would explore music beyond the tv and radio and discover some new sounds and grooves.

I can’t actually think of an interview where Flea acted like he was above the situation like a big star, or glamourized the lifestyle or talked about partying and banging groupie (I’m totally making this expression a thing now). It was ALWAYS about the music first and foremost, and for being a consummate musician like that, even if the last few RHCP have sounded bland to my ears, I’ll always have time to hear what Flea has to say, no matter what voice he chooses to use to speak it.

http://www.trollheart.com/MBJLT230613a.png
And so to the league table for this week. As you can see, Screen13 is holding on to his rather large lead at the top but is being challenged by, um, me, thanks to the hive of acitivity "Classic Albums" has become. My little journal jumps a massive 13 places, displacing poor Vanilla (sorry hon!) who drops from second to third this week. Other than that there's no huge major movers, with some journals moving up one place and others sliding down, and CrzyVegn now occupying the bottom rung, having slid from her position of 17 last week.

We have however two new entries, in the shape of Antonio, who comes in at 17, and after my impassioned plea and featuring of him on the Showcase last week, Engine at 19.

Leaving us this week: CanwllCorfe and Fetcher, and bubbling under is YorkeDaddy with 13 points. So update a little guys and you could be in the running. It's that simple. You don't need loads of points, you just need more than the person below you in the pecking order. Of course, if you want to rise to the dizzy heights of mid-table or even higher, that's going to take a little work and time. But we can't all update every day. Nice to see your name up there though...

Till next week, meatbags!
Toodles!

Quote:

Originally Posted by Trollheart (Post 1335522)

Hell yeah can't wait! Also guys, expect a review of another GLAMOROUS INDIE ROCK AND ROLL album...not saying which yet...heehee. :D

Quote:

Originally Posted by Powerstars (Post 1335612)

Hell yeah can't wait! Also guys, expect a review of another GLAMOROUS INDIE ROCK AND ROLL album...not saying which yet...heehee. :D

Oh now it's up...and I'm climbing up the charts. :D

Not to be a poo-pooer, but I'm pretty sure my last update was totally forgotten. ;)

You forgot to mention my two journal entries last week, yes TWO. I thought we were friends Trollheart :)

Quote:

Originally Posted by Trollheart (Post 1335600)

And so to the league table for this week. As you can see, Screen13 is holding on to his rather large lead at the top but is being challenged by, um, me, thanks to the hive of acitivity "Classic Albums" has become. My little journal jumps a massive 13 places, displacing poor Vanilla (sorry hon!) who drops from second to third this week. Other than that there's no huge major movers, with some journals moving up one place and others sliding down, and CrzyVegn now occupying the bottom rung, having slid from her position of 17 last week.

We have however two new entries, in the shape of Antonio, who comes in at 17, and after my impassioned plea and featuring of him on the Showcase last week, Engine at 19.

Leaving us this week: CanwllCorfe and Fetcher, and bubbling under is YorkeDaddy with 13 points. So update a little guys and you could be in the running. It's that simple. You don't need loads of points, you just need more than the person below you in the pecking order. Of course, if you want to rise to the dizzy heights of mid-table or even higher, that's going to take a little work and time. But we can't all update every day. Nice to see your name up there though...

Till next week, meatbags!
Toodles!

Hey, here's an annoying gif to describe my sad feelings at being third place:

http://i1021.photobucket.com/albums/...Fs/sadface.gif

Quote:

Originally Posted by Vanilla (Post 1335946)

Hey, here's an annoying gif to describe my sad feelings at being third place:

http://i1021.photobucket.com/albums/...Fs/sadface.gif

At least you're still in a bronze medal position. I've just gone up one place from 17th to 16th;)

I appreciate the nod Trollheart. I gotta start updating again so I can maybe make the list.

http://i539.photobucket.com/albums/f...ps87a195e9.jpg

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pedestrian (Post 1335925)

Not to be a poo-pooer, but I'm pretty sure my last update was totally forgotten. ;)

Well so far as I can see the last update was all about "I am not Drew" and I mentioned that in last week's update. I have double checked and other than comments I don't see anything new on it, unless I missed something?

Quote:

Originally Posted by Zer0 (Post 1335933)

You forgot to mention my two journal entries last week, yes TWO. I thought we were friends Trollheart :)

Zero man, I must apologise. I was so stuck on adding up points that although I saw your two great updates I did indeed fail to mention them in the main post. Lo siento mucho amigo!

I don't appear to be able to edit the posts, so if a kind mod could add this I'd be grateful. Just after "YorkeDaddy closes the show". Thanks.

How could I have forgotten Zero? He's in fact coming in behind YorkeDaddy, holding the door for him as he leaves and with his own journal http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...nal-sound.html buzzing he has an article on Strawberry Switchblade (remember them?) and also an album by AFI (don't remember them?). Sorry man! Head's just jammed up with figures, scores, charts, I don't know where I am!

Quote:

Originally Posted by Vanilla (Post 1335946)

Hey, here's an annoying gif to describe my sad feelings at being third place:

http://i1021.photobucket.com/albums/...Fs/sadface.gif

I saw you on the Jerry Springer Show telling everyone how Trollheart ruined your life.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Unknown Soldier (Post 1336017)

At least you're still in a bronze medal position. I've just gone up one place from 17th to 16th;)

Aww, I don't want you to feel bad. Your journal is far more worthy than mine. I need to write another entry because I enjoyed writing that review.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gavin B. (Post 1336321)

I saw you on the Jerry Springer Show telling everyone how Trollheart ruined your life.

:laughing:

I'm going to sue.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Vanilla (Post 1336345)

Aww, I don't want you to feel bad. Your journal is far more worthy than mine. I need to write another entry because I enjoyed writing that review.

:laughing:

I'm going to sue.

Yeah, visit your sister. I hope she makes you feel better! :laughing:

JER-RY! JER-RY! JER-RY! YOU SUCK! YOU SUCK! U-S-A! etc (God I hear that all the time from my sis's room; big Jerry fan...) :rolleyes:

Quote:

Originally Posted by Trollheart (Post 1336194)

Definitely missed something. I shortly thereafter posted an entirely new track-by-track review.

Yeah, yeah, you're correct (of course; you know your journal). I even read that (and very good it was too) but somehow missed it, like about three times when doing the update. Very sorry about that. Your points were added okay, but I didn't mention the article. Again, sorry about that. I'll make sure it's included in this week's.

I need to hire an assistant, that's what it is! Doing too much work on my own. Any applicants? ;)

Quote:

Originally Posted by Trollheart (Post 1336919)

I need to hire an assistant, that's what it is! Doing too much work on my own. Any applicants? ;)

I'll be your assistant. So long as it's understood that I'm not doing any work, get paid at least $30 an hour, and get to play video games all day.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Trollheart (Post 1336919)

I could do it. What shall I do, mastah?

Quote:

Originally Posted by The Batlord (Post 1337136)

I'll be your assistant. So long as it's understood that I'm not doing any work, get paid at least $30 an hour, and get to play video games all day.

Wow! What's the catch? :laughing:

Quote:

Originally Posted by Trollheart (Post 1337178)

Wow! What's the catch? :laughing:

tfw ignored. :(

Quote:

Originally Posted by Trollheart (Post 1337178)

Wow! What's the catch? :laughing:

I won't suck your dick. At least not without a 20% raise.

Quote:

Originally Posted by The Batlord (Post 1337136)

I'll be your assistant. So long as it's understood that I'm not doing any work, get paid at least $30 an hour, and get to play video games all day.

Quote:

Originally Posted by The Batlord (Post 1337367)

I won't suck your dick. At least not without a 20% raise.

A 20% raise in my dick? That's asking a lot! :shycouch: Can I have some porn to read?

Powerstars, what is "Tfw ignored"?

Update for week ending June 30 2013

Welcome to the world of, er, today! Time for yet another boring journal update, where those of you who can make it through feign interest in the work of others, and people like the Batlord just rush to see what I've said about their journal. Or in his case, journals. Whatever. Just as long as ya keep reading, meatbags! :)

Before we begin, and though I always do this thing alphabetically, I have an apology to issue. Last week's update did not mention any input from Pedestrian, and even when she reminded me of this omission I failed to see the entry. Eventually my old tired clapped-out peepers noticed it and so it's being included here, a week late. So sorry Ped both for not mentioning it and for thinking there was nothing to mention. Hey, I AM 50 next week! ;)

So then, in Pedestrian's excellent http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...sswalking.html last week she did a great track-by-track review of an album by a band who for some reason decided to call themselves A Burning Water --- thought water was always plural, as in "too much water here" not "too much waters"? Anyhoo, it's part of a new section she calls "Dirty Laundry", where she's going to be dredging up some embarrassing music from her past and seeing if it was really that bad. Seems on this occasion, it was and still is.

And now, on with the rest of the alphabet, for those of you not maligned (yet) by me...

The Batlord is back doing what he does best in http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...lks-about.html with Helloween and Exhorder on the menu. Mmm! Over in http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...t-schemes.html, "The Return of the Kings of Metal" is in full swing (that's swinging of a broadsword) --- if you haven't read his latest epic then why are you still standing here?

We have a new member! Well, not a new member, but a new journal. DJ Chameleon is planning to give us http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...chameleon.html, and in his first posts he's talking about his childhood, how he got his username and also a note on albums listeners vs single listeners. Sounds interesting!

http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...use-songs.html is as busy as ever, with reviews of Fela Kuti, the father of Afro-Beat music apparently, and two Lost Album Classics!

The Phanastasio has finally added in the long-awaited next chapter to "The wonderful strange ones" in http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...s-journal.html. And apologies Sara: I've been calling you The Phantasio up to now! Oops! :shycouch:

Powerstars is reviewing two very different album in http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...sicalness.html, one from the Killers and one from Dragonforce. Yeah. Told you they were different!

http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...-observer.html, but not out to conquer or enslave us, so far as I know, Stephen is checking out an album by Died Pretty. Can't say I've heard of them, but then you won't be surprised at that!

Me? Well again I've been a little preoccupied this week so there's not a huge amount to report from my journals. Only three have been updated. In http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...d-journal.html we're wrapping up the fourth instalment of my special on the NWOBHM with a look at Diamond Head, while over at http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...-emporium.html we finally start reviewing Frasier, and another http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...ver-heard.html is Skynyrd's classic debut album: remedying that this week.

Unknown Soldier has picked his Album of the Year for 1976: you'll never guess what it is! No, you really won't. Look, just take my word for it okay? Head his way to find out. Here! Do I have to take you by the hand? http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...y-history.html --- just follow the sound of guitars and as they get louder and then unbearably loud you'll know you're nearly there.

Urban's got a word about "Awesome songs you've never heard" over at http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...nal-stuff.html

while it's a second look at Talk Talk's "Laughing stock" as http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...used-hate.html

Now for this week's Showcase. In a shameless and completely obvious attempt to earn forgiveness for last week's blunder, I'm featuring that lady again. Hey, she deserves it! She may not update as regularly as some, but when she does, it's well worth the wait!
http://www.musicbanter.com/avatars/4...ine=1369278413

Pedestrian is of course one of the moderators here, and seems to have been here forever, though her avatar says she only joined in 2010! Shows how much she's got done in such a relatively short time. Initially, I always though she was a guy, as her strapline is "Pedantic bastard". Well, what would YOU think?

Anyway, here's an extract from her always interesting and worth checking out and never missing an update journal...
This is the famous "I am not Drew".

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pedestrian (Post 1264263)

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v1...kcrosswalk.gif

I'm Not Drew: An Ongoing Narrative of Inadvertent Identity Theft

Upon moving house and beginning college this past September, I became a member of the cellular club, and acquired my first mobile phone. I lamented the purchase, because while I had stubbornly managed fine for 23 years without one, in a new city, without a home phone, I was aware of its necessity. Never did it occur to me the great source of entertainment it would provide.

I am at heart an annoying prat who receives immense satisfaction from the irritation and stupidity of other people, so it was my joy when I received my first ever wrong-number text.

Unknown: What's up?
Self: Not much, you?
Unknown: You bringing the wings?
Unknown: Is this Drew?

I take the bait.

Self: Yeah, it's Andrew.

A minor thrill which nothing came of for weeks, until...

Unknown: Hey, you said I need a new fuel pump, right? Do I go to GM or Lordco?

I punch "fuel pump" into Google, and pick out the first result.

Self: Go with an AC Delco.
Unknown: But it needs to be for a GM?
Unknown: Nevermind, AC Delco is GM, lol.

In accidentally recommending the correct part, I become the Rainman of auto mechanics.

Unknown: So should I bring it in on Tuesday?
Self: Yeah, sure.
Unknown: And do you think Lordco will have it?
Self: Not sure. Call and ask.

Two weeks pass, and in the interim I receive a number of voicemails from a credit company looking for Drew, which I immediately delete. Then:

Unknown: This is how my heater sounds at 5 AM.

Attached is a three minute audio sample of "HHHHHHHHHHSSSSSHHHHHHKKRRRRNGRNGRNGRNG".

Self: This is how a harelip crow sounds.

Attached in reply is a 3 second clip of warbled cawing.

Another two weeks pass at least, and then:

Unknown: Did you order that part?
Self: Ah shit, I forgot.
Unknown: Can you do it tomorrow, and I'll bring it in on Monday?

I briefly consider continuing the prank, but decide it would be cruel to make a false appointment with the man, who may potentially go very far out of his way to find out he'd been had. My conscience gets the better of me.

Self: Listen, man. I enjoyed messing with you for a while, but I can't let you make a fake appointment. You've got the wrong number. I'm not Drew. Sorry man.
Unknown: Lol, that's fucking funny.

Ten minutes pass.

Unknown: So you going to be at the pub Sat?

He still thinks I'm Drew. Pretending not to be Drew. With that in mind...

...

Self: Yeah. I'll be there.

The next week I receive a number of calls from the credit company, which I finally listen to thoroughly.

Credit Company: Hello, we are calling for Drew Crowe--

Will the perfection never cease? In addition, at this point my voicemail recording now says "I'm not Drew. Noooooot Drew. This isn't Drew, and Drew's not here". Furthermore, I have called the voicemail of Unknown, and learned he is named Al.

The following weekend, pursuaded by two bottles of wine, I get my hands on my cell phone and fire off messages to everyone in my list, including:

Self: Hey Al! I'm bringing the wings Sunday?
Al: Lol, no.
Self: Did I get the day wrong?
Al: Yeah, it's Wednesday man.
Self: Oh, okay. See you then.

But it would seem that Al isn't Drew's only friend, and automotives aren't Drew's only profession...

New Unknown: Hey does your phone have a plan
Self: No, I don't.
New Unknown: So talking is out of the question then
Self: I've got free texting. What's up?
New Unknown: Text me if you hear from your buddy

I'm sitting in a cab with my roommate as I receive this message, heading home for the holidays.

Self: I'm with my buddy right now.
New Unknown: So what's the word, should I drive over there for dinner
Self: Nah, we're not home right now.
New Unknown: Is there a chance to find what I need today

My roommate, reading these, laughs, "He's looking for drugs".

Self: Depends what you're looking for.
New Unknown: About a gram or close to it
Self: Are you looking for Drew?
New Unknown: Well I'm hoping if this is his phone that I'm going to be visiting him today
Self: Today's not the best man
New Unknown: Alright, cool, I'll look elsewhere

.

And thus I have become Drew, a shady-mechanic/small-time-drug-dealer with bad credit and an acquaintance named Al, who really likes chicken wings, and apparently didn't pay his phone bill, resulting in the recycling of his phone number.

I now understand the entire appeal of cell phones.

And so as I narrowly escape with my reputation intact and without a permaban, let's have a look at this week's league table...

Ah, but before we do, another point. In something of an effort to encourage people to try their hand at journal writing, I've decided to award a special, one-off point bonus of 50 to anyone who starts, or has started, a journal recently. I've backdated this to when the update thread began, with the result that there are some rather unexpected advances in the table this week, and a new entry too. This is, as I say, strictly a one-off award and given regardless of the content of the journal, the member, or anything else.

http://www.trollheart.com/MBJLT300613ba.png

A few surprises here this week, though Screen 13, despite not having made any entries this week (as of the time of writing) is still at the top. There's a leap for the Batlord from number 8 to number 6, as he contemptuously kicks down Urban and the Big3 with his new epic in "The Batcave", while Stephen rises from 12 to 9 with the benefit of that "Beginner's Award" I mentioned. CrazyVegn also profits from that: she was about to fall off the chart last week but thanks to the award has clawed her way upwards, to currently occupy the 16th position.

Two re-entries as YorkeDaddy and The Phanastasio update their journals and come in at 15 and 19 respectively, while there's a brand new journal from DJ Chameleon which makes its entrance at number 13. This week we lose (hopefully only temporarily, it's up to you guys) Engine and Antonio, while Zero just about hangs on to the cliff-face at number 20.

Bubbling under it's pretty much the same as last week, with the addition of the two abovementioned who have slipped off the table for now.

Now, before I go, a negative comment has been made (I won't say by who) about the way I devised the points system for this chart. I think it's unfounded personally, as I made certain that when I was putting this together it would be as fair to newcomers as old hands. If I just based it on views then the journals who had been here longer would have an unfair advantage, and if I based it purely on posts without any thought to what sort of posts they were, unscrupulous members with nothing better in their lives could post one-liners and comments every day just to get up the table, which is something I think nobody wants. So this seems the best way, but if anyone has a problem with it (and cares enough for it to bother them) my inbox is always open.

So that's it for another week. Hope you all have fun reading, updating or both, and don't forget to look into the Batcave: that epic is hilarious!

Well, I'm sick of this room and everybody in it! Goodbye, losers whom I've always hated! :laughing:
Toodles!

Oh, alright, you're redeemed.

AHEM.

If you are in the mood for reading and enjoying a poem by yours truly, Blarobbarg, essayist, poet, and author-in-the-makings, while leading your ears into a one minute and thirty-five second feast, you could head to MY journal, the specific entry in question being found below.

http://www.musicbanter.com/1336526-post20.html

Quote:

Originally Posted by Trollheart (Post 1337710)

A 20% raise in my dick? That's asking a lot! :shycouch: Can I have some porn to read?

Powerstars, what is "Tfw ignored"?

That feeling when ignored, cuz I applied to be an assistant. :/

Quote:

Originally Posted by Blarobbarg (Post 1337808)

Blaro I did see that, and read it (and very good it was), but here's why I didn't mention it. You said at the beginning of the post that you were working on another blog and that you had more or less ignored your MB one, so with the likelihood that you were not planning to get back to this one I thought best not to mention it and get people's hopes up. If you're intending to update again I will mention it in the next update, fair? It's like Zarko's post, where he said he might have to update soon, but hasn't yet. I just want to make sure I'm drawing attention to journals that will be sticking around.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Powerstars (Post 1337809)

That feeling when ignored, cuz I applied to be an assistant. :/

Sorry man. I was only joking about the assistant: I'm tighter than Mr Burns skin is to his skeleton, and I wouldn't wish this job on anyone... No hard feelings, or perhaps I should say nhf? ;)

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pedestrian (Post 1337799)

Oh, alright, you're redeemed.

Woo-hoo! Redemption is mine! In your FACE, destiny! :tramp:

I love how I'm third and I haven't done anything in two weeks. I have been so busy in real life dammit that I haven't had time to write anything. But I will.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Trollheart (Post 1337823)

Fair enough. I wasn't really upset, I was just being smarmy. :p:

Quote:

Originally Posted by Trollheart (Post 1337823)

Okay, that's fine. :D

Don't worry, I will be back this week! This last was spent being very busy and actually indulging in other things such as Photography, researching on what played at the Drive Ins in Detroit from 1976-85 (as I found a library in my area that had microfilm from the Detroit News and the Free Press), and some other things. Many different things going on including some planning to changes in the Ghost Mall Music arena - The addition of posts about SINGLES!!! I know a lot of people don't get into them, but I have been choosing a select bunch from here and there recently after finding some here and there that really reflects the mood of the title even more, although the will be still with the albums (especially the Cut Outs). As usual, as Malls were changing and developing from time to time, so will my writing - maybe it's out of having "Ever Changing Moods" (Yeah, Style Council Reference!), but I have to keep some things fresh so that it won't be the same although they may get things more into focus.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Vanilla (Post 1337827)

I love how I'm third and I haven't done anything in two weeks. I have been so busy in real life dammit that I haven't had time to write anything. But I will.

That's what showing Trollheart your naked boobies will do for you. I tried, but he just threw up and poured bleach on his eyes.

Quote:

Originally Posted by The Batlord (Post 1338127)

That's what showing Trollheart your naked boobies will do for you. I tried, but he just threw up and poured bleach on his eyes.

:laughing:

My titties are pretty great. I sometimes enjoy them more than guys do! Plus I have a nice ass.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Vanilla (Post 1338718)

:laughing:

My titties are pretty great. I sometimes enjoy them more than guys do! Plus I have a nice ass.

As people are so fond of saying around here: pictures or it didn't happen! :laughing:

How many points did you say you wanted on the board this week? ;)

Update for week ending July 7 2013

Hey hey! I'm 50 now! Joining the old codgers' brigade. Soon I won't have the strength to type on a keypad! Before that happens, let's get on with the first update for July, while I can still see through these rheum-encrusted eyes ... come closer, into the light ...that's it. Ah, now I can see you. Very well then, let us begin to commence the update.

The Batlord is on fire this week --- not literally of course, but his metal epic "The return of the Kings of Metal part II" is something you really don't want to miss. To partake of its excellence, you must brave http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...t-schemes.html, and hope that he will find you worthy. If that is too taxing a quest for you, try http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...lks-about.html, where he's currently listening to thrash metal --- yeah, I know: who would have thought it. eh? --- in the shape of Death Angel.

Chrysalis has revived his (or her) journal, and there you'll find reviews of Access to Arasaka and Air, all here in http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...s-journal.html

No Wave? No Wave? What the hell is No Wave? Well, I'm certainly not the man to explain it to you, but I know a man who can! Head to http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...use-songs.html and all will be revealed.

Coming back after over a year's inactivity, the lovely Lateralus poses some interesting questions in http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...anderings.html, not least of which is how modern technology is affecting how musicians record and collaborate. Oh, she's also looking at video game music: Powerstars'll love ya for that! Welcome back lady!

And speaking of the Beatles fanatic, he's certainly working on his journal, where he's reviewing an album by Life in HD as well as The White Stripes' "Elephant" (inspired by my short review in the "Classic Albums" journal, apparently) and there's another Song Overthinker, all in http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...sicalness.html.

The continuing story of Plankton's musical journey to greatness takes a new twist with "The Iron Maiden" edition in http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...um-bucket.html: all aspiring axemen need to read this!

Screen13 is back in business at http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...all-music.html, with an ongoing feature on singles, concerning this week Bowie, Big Country and Arcadia.

I've been doing a little work myself this week. In http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...d-journal.html there are two new sections. The first, "Encyclopaedia Obscuria", looks at bands or artistes who were, shall we say, less than household names, with the first subject being UK band Pilot, while "Discovery: what's on the disc?" is my attempt to actually listen to, and review, tracks from those giveaway coverdiscs which are sold with music mags, and which though touted as free are usually the reason the mag costs so much! This first edition explores a prog rock band from Norway called The Windmill.

Big things happening at http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...-emporium.html too, where we're finishing off season one of Babylon 5, and another of the http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...ver-heard.html is Terence Trent D'Arby's debut. Remember him? Well the album is certainly memorable. Finally, http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...i-reviews.html gets a decent look-in too, with albums from Magellan and Ice Age.

One of the premier albums of the mid-seventies, Rainbow's seminal "Rising" is given the Unknown Soldier treatment over at http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...y-history.html,

Wolfwolverineweiselpigeon has restarted her journal too, and in http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...-tripping.html she's beginning to talk about the artistes she's been listening to over the last three months, beginnig with Wingbut Dishwasher's Union and Johnny Hobo and the Freight Trans, both fronted, she tells us, by the same person.

while YorkeDaddy has created a second journal, chronicling his musical adventures in http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...sterpiece.html. Damn interesting stuff, and it sounds like his band has potential. Stay tuned...

True to his word, and with perhaps a little gentle push from me, Zarko has kicked http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...oes-night.html back into life, with mentions of Rubberroom among others.

Finally, Zero has invented something! And it's his very own music player! Check out http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...nal-sound.html to hear all about it, though he's not quite ready yet, apparently, to offer it for download.

This week's Showcase is well overdue. This man has been quietly hammering away in his journal workshop, week in week out, tracing the history of hard rock and heavy metal for over a year now, so it's about time we gave him a shout out.
http://www.musicbanter.com/avatars/3...ine=1308063934
If there's anything Unknown Soldier doesn't know about this genre it's really not worth knowing. He's a veritable fount of knowledge on all things heavy and musical. I challenge you to best him: go on, try it. He'll hit you with a stream of facts and figures and information you did not even know existed about the artiste and leave you grovelling in the dirt, wondering why you attempted the impossible. Don't believe me? Here, read this:

Quote:

Originally Posted by Unknown Soldier (Post 1304549)

01. Blue Oyster Cult Secret Treaties 1974 (Columbia)
Hard Rock
http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-nFcoyRCidk...1.LZZZZZZZ.jpg
A psychedelic noir of a secret career.

Overview
Blue Oyster Cult’s third album Secret Treaties would be the ultimate culmination of their early work and the album would go onto to top various musical polls as one of the best albums of its type. That in itself is a rather dubious point, because not many bands sounded like BOC at all, as not many bands set themselves out to be the ‘Thinking Man’s Metal Band’ either. So three albums in, this NY area based band and their core biker band sound, which had long been infused with a heavy psychedelic rock style, borrowed over from the late 1960s and then neatly blended in with some R&B, had succeeded where so many of their fellow other American counterparts such as Sir Lord Baltimore, Dust and Bang had failed! So what made the Blue Oyster Cult different from those bands? Firstly they had been able to shed their ‘American Black Sabbath’ label and had taken their sound to far greater depths and diversity than Black Sabbath could’ve dreamed or even dared go! Secondly they were a group of artists that were masters of their trade and felt totally at ease in what they were doing, whether that was complex jamming, hard rock overtones or brittle sounding pop flourishes. Thirdly they had created a unique murky sound and when you heard the band, you knew exactly who they were! Secret Treaties was without doubt, the album that the band had always sought to achieve and not just fall into like say Deep Purple with Machine Head. Just going back a few years, gave an indication of where the band wanted to be a few years down the line. The debut had a been a very subjective affair, but Tyranny and Mutation had the band knocking right on the door of where they wanted to be! Tyranny and Mutation had been the creative leap by the band and in many ways had Tyranny and Mutation not been recorded, it could be safe to say that we would never have got Secret Treaties a year later. The album cover was designed by Ron Lesser, with a German ME262 on the front cover and this was something of a change as far as the band were concerned image wise as well, and the plane would be an inspiration for one of the songs. More significantly though since I started these reviews, Secret Treaties would be the first ever album to attain the number one position by a non-British band (all five previous number ones had been British bands) and demonstrated a strong catch-up by the American bands within this genre.

Eric Bloom- Guitar/Vocals
Donald ‘Buck Dharma’ Roeser- Guitar
Allen Lainier- Rhythm/Keyboards
Joe Bouchard- Bass
Albert Bouchard- Drums

Production- Sandy Pearlman and Murray Krugman

Album
Career of Evil- The opening of the song on the album, sounds like we’re entering the album in ‘media res’ as the track basically sounds like a mid-album effort and not an opening track. The song was jointly written by Albert Bouchard and Patti Smith (her only credit on the album) the song vibrates a strong R&B beat with a dash of glam rock. Subhuman- With its subtle low key start of echoing melody, the song then enters more concrete terrain, but the strength of the song remains in its subtle melody which resonates throughout the track. Dominance and Submission- With its clock ticking intro that is quickly followed up by its angsty start and Eric Bloom sounds quite different here (has more range than he’s given credit for) in fact the song resonates a nervous sharp beat and singing style, that a future Devo would adopt, the song is boosted up by some jokey speaking sections and fills out its 5 plus minutes amiably. ME262- A BOC work of art with its pacey leading and rhythm section in perfect unison and borrows in feel from the previous “Dominance and Submission” and the later guitar section is pure mastery from the band. Cagey Cretins- With its great title and drumming intro, and overall upbeat feel, the band continue on from the previous two efforts. Harvester of Eyes- We go into a slightly more serious and mid-tempo terrain here, and all is highlighted by razor sharp guitar riffs and yet again all is underscored by Allen Lainier on keys, before ending in a grouchy and then musical box affair. Flaming Telepaths- One of the showpiece tracks on the album, highlighted by the band’s profound lyrics and the song’s almost hypnotic piano, along with crossing guitar lines which at times throb with a real intensity and all this contrasts with an amazing rhythm section, a classic cut without a doubt. Astronomy- A far cry from the album opener, with its melancholic feel and slow opening, before taking on a more up-tempo middle section and shows just how visionary this band were right to the end of the album, but nothing can quite prepare the listener for the spiralling outro section, which hits the listener like a soft brick and then its final windy section! On the 2001 re-issue of the album, there are a number of bonus songs such as “Boorman the Chauffeur” a light-hearted cut focusing on the once disappeared Nazi Boorman and is somewhat inspired by the Who’s “Boris the Spider”. “Mommy” A crunching bass song and based around humour. “Mes Dames Serat” Easily the best of the bonus tracks and dominated by both guitar and drums and finally there is a cover of the song made famous by Steppenwolf “Born to be Wild”.

Verdict
Secret Treaties marks the end of the band’s black and white period and the brilliance of the album lies in its musical textures, along with Sandy Pearlman’s multi-layering thus giving us another muddy ambiguous mix, but this time with greater clarity. The twin guitar attack by Bloom and Dharma contrasts so majestically at times with Bouchard’s bass, along with some outstanding work by Lainier’s again on both rhythm and keyboards, yet again it is he that gels the whole band's sound together! This combination basically serves up a musical lesson on how a cohesive band of five highly talented individuals can function as a collective whole and without any wastage. The songs on Secret Treaties just seem to run seamlessly and songs like “Career of Evil” “Subhuman” ”Harvester of Eyes” “Flaming Telepaths” and the closing “Astronomy” example this to perfection, in fact there’s not a dud in sight! The album also shows us, just how effortlessly the band have added new ideas and musical add-ons to their traditional sound, the process had already started on Tyranny and Mutation and then completed right here! Most of the songs on Secret Treaties seem to have an up-tempo beat, whether that is from the guitars or the drums and this factor drives right through the whole album, and ultimately provides both its essence and soul. It does this by presenting us with a landscape of constantly shifting sounds, as the album moves in and out of both darkness and shadows in an almost seamless way. BOC are a band that desperately need multiple listens and so whether this brilliance sinks into the listener’s subconscious on the first or tenth listen, it’s sure to get its message across in the end! In fact the only detraction for me on this classic album, is that Buck Dharma doesn’t sing on any of the album’s songs as he had done on their first two albums, as this time Eric Bloom sings lead on every song, with the exception of “Cagey Cretins” which is co-sung with the Bouchard brothers. Despite that slight and a very small one at that, before us stands one of the very best albums of the decade, from a band that were able to go to musical dimensions that few could follow and they managed to do that without ever treading down the progressive rock avenue!

And now for the league table. Four weeks in, a month on the go, and Screen 13 is still on top. But what's this? Someone is challenging him for top spot...

http://www.trollheart.com/MBJLT070713a.png

Yes, that's the mighty Batlord coming screeching in like the hellion from Judas Priest's "Screaming for vengeance", as the Batcave launches an all-out assault on Ghost Mall and tries to reduce it to ashes. With his latest epic in full swing His Batship has been really working on his journal and it shows, as he climbs a massive five places to this week's number two spot! Even knocks me down, the cheeky beggar! I'm not too glum though, as also moving, thanks to my big Babylon 5 update, is the Couch Potato, which climbs four places from last week's 17 to this week's 14.

Nothing too much else of note, but we have a new entry from YorkeDaddy at 17, while his other journal slips from 15 to 18, and DJ Chameleon slides from last week's entry point of 13 to this week's 16. CrazyVegn, meanwhile, is back at the bottom, hanging on at 20.

I must apologise to the Batlord though, as for some unknown reason I completely left his other journal, "Random ****" out of the count for last week, with the result that though it should have showed up on the table it didn't. I've rectified this now, so it might look like he's jumped a good few places, when in fact he's just about where his score should place him. Sorry about that Batty, but at least you now have two journals in the top 10!

Saying goodbye this week to Engine, Zero and Antonio, while waiting to take their places just at the fringes are The Phanastasio and Lateralus.

So that's our first journal update for July. Thanks to all who took the time to create, maintain or even revive their journals, and don't forget, if you create a new journal you automatically get a 50-point starter. Also, if you write something I find particularly interesting, funny or different, there's another ten points in it for you.

Next week: battle royale as the Batlord takes on Screen 13 in a winner-takes-all fixture. Be here, or be somewhere else!
Toodles!

Thanks for the mention, Trollheart! :D

(I'm a guy, BTW)

Quote:

Originally Posted by Trollheart (Post 1340881)

Coming back after over a year's inactivity, the lovely Lateralus poses some interesting questions in http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...anderings.html, not least of which is how modern technology is affecting how musicians record and collaborate. Oh, she's also looking at video game music: Powerstars'll love ya for that! Welcome back lady!

Awww, thanks Trollheart! It's good to be back :) And congrats again on the half-century! Hope you had a wonderful birthday!

That feeling when I dropped a place. :(

So...
*strips down*
How many points will this get me? :p

Thanks for the mention and you're eyes seem to be playing up as well, as you forgot to mention my Aerosmith review along with the Rainbow one.

Important Note: Do you want the League Table to continue?

In general I've been a little disappointed with the response to the league table and was wondering is anyone that bothered? I've had negative comments on it, a few positive, but it's a lot of work and if no-one's that pushed about it I may as well wind it up.

Don't get me wrong: I enjoy doing it but if it's purely for my enjoyment it's way too much work to do.

Could you all please just check the poll I'll be putting in the main section and vote, so that I can see if I should continue this or kill it off?

Thanks
Troll

Quote:

Originally Posted by Trollheart (Post 1341130)

I don't mind about the league table, but personally I love this thread just because it's a good way to be updated on everyone's journals and a convenient way to read about what everyone has been posting and then go and check out their journals. So I don't really use/keep up with the league table but if others are into it then I don't mind either way :)