I wouldn't be surprised be surprised.

Huh? I'm not sure if you're aiming that at me or him...? Either way, I don't think six lines is too much to ask someone to read, especially when it concerns such a personal and important issue.

She was my Aunt..
Nor I. And while we're on the subject, another thing that bugs all hell out of me is people going on about "walls of text". I mean, yeah, if it's a boring medical or scientific or scholarly text, maybe (though of course plenty of people are into all of them) but just because someone takes the time to write down all they feel/want to say about something without throwing in some images or videos, you get labelled as building a wall of text? To those who have a problem with same, what's wrong with you? Did you never read a book? Are your attention spans that short that you need pictures to break up the scary wall of words? If the subject is interesting enough, if there's good writing in it and if it doesn't just keep repeating the same things, and if you're interested in the subject, why not have walls of text? What's wrong with them? I feel the ones who moan about walls of text should be looking at themselves and asking why they have a problem reading several paragraphs on a subject? I'd always rather write more than less, as long as it's not pointless drivel (which, to be fair, describes most of my writing, I know...)
:shycouch:
I hesitate to use an Americanism but I think it's appropriate here: this is going to be awesome.
Do I understand you to say you're writing this yourself, as in, it's your concept, or are you quoting from someone else's writings? Either way, it sounds like you may have bagged Journal of the Year 2017 before you've even written a word! :clap:

As much as I would like to read every single little word on this forum, I don't have nearly as much time on this forum as I used to. I sent my condolences by responding to it. I figured that'd suffice. I could have just not responded at all. I don't live on this forum like the rest of you.

You didn't?

*gets criticised for being a ****

*responds by being a ****

If it makes anyone feel any better, I would've have even seen the post TH made had people not responded to it with his news of the passing. I'm not going to feel belittled because of that.

TH I'm sorry you took offense and I'm sorry for the recent passing, but I'm not going to feel like I did something wrong when I wouldn't have seen the post to begin with.

See I don't understand that. I CAN write huge walls of text, specially when I'm upset (and I certainly was) but I stopped myself from doing that, and condensed it into six lines, and you STILL found it tl;dr, esp as it was so personal. Yet I bet you read a review of some game or album that was a lot longer. I'm not taking offence that you didn't read it, as such, but that you had the gall to call it tl;dr when it most certainly was not. If you can't take ten seconds to read six lines then fine, but don't call it too long, because that is an insult, whether you see it as one or not.

I think you're taking my insinuation that it was tl;dr a little too seriously and personally. I meant it as a joke. Obviously I give a **** about what happened which is why I did look for the post everyone was responding to. If I really was a dick, I wouldn't have bothered. And to be honest, I haven't really been reading or writing reviews, which is evident through the lack of entries in my month long gaming journal theme. I meant no harm, but obviously it was taken as an attack. Not what I intended, obviously. You should know me well enough to know that I wouldn't go out of my way to **** on the passing of a family member.

My fault, you keep saying auntie and in my brain I keep thinking grandmother because of her age.

How can I take it any other way than personally and seriously, when the post related to my advising everyone that my favourite aunt had passed away? If there's something more serious or personal than that, I don't know what it is.

There are times for jokes, Ki, and this is not one of them. If I write something intensely personal and you say it was too long, then I can't in all honesty see that as being a joke, and if it was, it wasn't funny. Obviously I'm not insinuating that you don't care, and while I don't wish to make a federal case of this, I think it's important to distinguish between what could be seen as banter and outright rudeness or thoughtlessness. Even Batty had a sincere comment, and if anyone was going to make an off-colour joke I might have expected it from him. But you have to say (and it's odd I know but there it is) in this case, he had more class than you.

I've checked it out: twenty-one seconds to read without rushing, and anyone in all fairness who reads a message that begins "My aunt passed away" and can't be bothered to read the next few lines, well, I don't know what to say. Had you read it through (a valuable twenty seconds I'm sure you could have spent in other ways) you would not have needed to make the remark that you did here, committing a social faux pas of sorts, and this issue would not have come up. Given that, had you not read it and then responded with "sorry man didn't read/see the post" that would be better than, essentially, "sorry could not be bothered". Considering how people (including me) have supported you recently, the idea of even thinking of making a joke about this comes across as very cold and emotionless, whether that was the intention or not.

tl;dr: I didn't find your comment funny, I don't see it as a joke and I kind of doubt anyone but you gets it. Maybe have a bit more consideration next time, yeah?

http://vignette4.wikia.nocookie.net/...20141024230457
Hiddley-ho, memberinos! Poor old Trollheart is so snowed under with work that he's asked for some help, and what kind of Christian would I be if I said no? So for the next few weeks you'll be in the careful hands of Ned “Air Cello” Flanders. What? Oh, some of those chamber music recitals can be brutal, let me assure you! Hmm? Headbanging? Well, sir, if you have a sore head I heartily recommend my good friend Doctor Hibbert. He'll put you right in a jifferoonie! As long as you have insurance, of course. You do have insurance, don't you? Well of course you do! You're not welfare spongers now are you? Of course you're not! What's that Homer? Get on with the goshdarndoodly what? Oh Homer Simpson, you just wash out your mouth this instant, sir! I won't have that kind of sailor talk around my kids. They do not! When? Why, sir, if I wasn't so busy I'd come right down there and ... and ... and read you a passage in the Bible where it says He who.. Oh, he's gone.

Well anyway, welcome to the first Update of February, or at least the first since the sad passing of poor Trollheart's aunt, may she rest in peace. Let me tell ya, I'm just pickled tink to be asked to handle this, and we've got a goshdarned lot ot get through, so let's just fire up old Propane Elaine, have a plain burger (no dicing with death for me, thank you! I'll leave the devil's blood – sorry, ketchup – to others more brave or foolhardy than I!) and a nice honest glass of lemonade, and dive right in. What's that you say, young fella? Well now! That's just rude!

Ooh smooth jazz! I do like anything smooth, and jazz is about the most inoffensive music you can listen to, so there's absolutely no possibility of my having to go to confession more than four times a week. It's all thanks to Anteater (I thought it was only humans who posted here? Oh well, all of God's creatures...) who is resurrecting – um, no, that's a little blasphemous, isn't it? Well, bringing back to life – no, no that's just as bad. Digging up – oh darn! Why the heckeroonie can't I think of a word that isn't frowned on by the Church? Let's see ... reopening. Reopening? Well ... reopening the tomb, Jesus rising, angels singing .. yep! That seems acceptable. So, the little Anteater is reopening http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...ed-masses.html, with a sneak peek of what he's going to be featuring, such as Vaporwave (sounds like something to do with hairstyling, I think?) Best and worst smooth jazz (is there any bad smooth jazz?) and ... um .. weird stuff that will blow your mind? Ah, let's just leave this here and proceed to the next one before I feel a sudden urge to write a strongly-worded letter, shall we?

Next up is, let's see, The Batlord? Well, he may be lord of bats, but we all know there's only one true Lord who matters, and that's the Lord Jesus Christ, praised be his name. Well now, this Batlord fella seems really into pictures of men snarling and holding - UPSIDE DOWN CRUCIFIXES??? Could it be these Slayer boys are ... gasp! NOT a Christian rock band? Oh my heart! Moving on, moving on very swiftly indeed from http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...ite-about.html and on to

http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...cking-out.html Well sir, being cool is just another way of saying you're a rebel, and I don't hold with that one little bit. What's that you say? Jesus himself was a rebel? Now see here ... I ... well sir ... excuse me a moment. Reverend Lovejoy? What? He was? What do you mean, technically, Reverend? Reverend? Hello? Diddly? Humph! Well, I like gadgets as much as the next man but I've never heard of a Fad one...


http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...obably-dl.html sounds harmless and good wholesome fun. This Goofle chappie recommends Mew (always liked pussy cats) and Oscar (ah, that muppet who lived in the trash can! Always scared me) while

http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...nnerspace.html sounds a little suspect for a God-fearing Christian like me, but this innerspaceboy seems to have some good talent for writing. “Born Slippy”, avant-pop, not bad so far. Hmm. Black Metal? Well, let's be fair now: the coloured community deserve their music too. As long as they play it a long long way from Evergreen Terrace, of course! Some names I can't even pronounce in there. Each to his own, say I, as long as he keeps it to himself.

I do however have a problem with http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...is-arcade.html. Rod and Todd spend far too much time in arcades, mostly hanging around that Simpson boy. He's a bad influence, I tell you! And where, may I ask, are the games where angels defeat Liberal – I mean, demons, or where Jesus stomps all over the nasty Planned Parenthood Monster? Not here, sonny! No, all we see here are titles like Ori and the Blind Forest, Okhlos... Fallout 4? Dirty Bomb? Oh no no no! My boys are NOT playing anything like this, thank you very much!

http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...d-my-life.html. Sounds like a fun thing to do. Comus. Nope. No idea. Some Japanese gentleman in black and white, perhaps a photograph from the war? And Sunny Day Real Estate. I remember when Homer's wife worked for a real estate company...

http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...jawn-yall.html. Oh dear Lord preserve me. Philadelphia. City of brotherly love, but also of that “other” type of brotherly love. Now, I have nothing against homer-sexuals, you understand. If people choose to be gay, that's their business, and the Lord will smite them on the Last Day. I just don't want to catch gay from this journal, so I'm going to very carefully move on and check Neapolitan's other effort. http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...antiquity.html. Now that sounds much better! Probably about the lives of the saints, or something. As long as it's not that Saint Martin: far too racy for me. Can't believe they canonised ... oh. Not about the saints. Or the architecture of cathedrals. Well I'll be goshdarned. Still, Sugar Shoppe sounds inoffensive enough. Midwinter? Well that's a hymn isn't it? In the bleak midwinter. Good stuff. Fields? Nothing objectionable about fields. We come in from them rejoicing, bringing in the sheaves. And I like the cover too: a Republican hawk taking down a namby-pamby Democrat rabbit. Dry Ice might be slightly suspect, The Hip Harp of Dorothy Ashby? Hmm. Harp players: the bad boys and girls of the orchestra. Think they're so cool...

http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...cking-out.html Oh, Mister Occulthawk, I don't let the boys use Spotify! Never know when they might hear music that isn't approved by the Church – or the Goverment, which as we all know is the same goshdarned thing! If you wish to partake of the Devil's music though, names like Sophie Agnel, John Edwards and Steve Nobel are probably the kind of thing you'll find carved into the steps on the flaming road to Hell...

Would it be unchristian of me to say the next journal describes Homer's life? Yes, yes it would. Lord forgive me. http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...crap-heap.html seems to have a lot of mathematics in it today. Oh Pet_Sounds, you don't need maths! All the world was created by the Lord Almighty, and He shall provide you all the answers you need. Trust in him and throw away your slide rule!

Here's a strange one. Mrs Tristan Rosenstock, but it's a fella. Well, I guess what we're dealing with here is one of those cross-dressers, fellas who like to wear their wives' clothes. Never understood that myself – Maud's dresses would never fit me – I mean, well, you have to try it, don't you? Just once? Like that time I lost a bet with Homer and we had to mow the lawns in our wives' dresses? No I did not enjoy it, how dare you sir! The only reason I have not got rid of Maud's clothes – especially her, ah, underthings – up to this point is, is ... well, um, er ... ah ... Martha! Yes, yes. Martha. That's it. The artiste being discussed by the abovementioned in http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...ower-punk.html.

And that brings us to Trollheart himself, and if you think he's not busy, well take a look at this. David Bowie in http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...d-journal.html, that scary Jaws movie in http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...ox-office.html, Annie Lennox, Tears For Fears and ... Black Sabbath (?) in http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...ox-office.html. Also scary darey Dracula (brr!) and The Silver Surfer in http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...d-2000-ad.html, random playlists in http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...k-journal.html, Frasier and 24 in http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...-emporium.html, and as if that wasn't enough, he's started up yet another journal, http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...-cartoons.html. Well, at least one little mouse from a certain southern border will not be coming over here any more, no siree bob! Mister Trump's wall will see to that. God bless you, President Trump, and may the Lord someday bless you with more realistic hair, amen.

And now it's time to pick your
http://www.trollheart.com/quill.jpg
(though technically it's the post of almost three weeks)
This week it comes from Pet_Sounds, for this odd mathematical problem in the middle of his journal. It's too goshdarned long and intricate to replicate it in its entireity, so we'll just leave this link here for those of you who wish to read it. And condemn themselves to everlasting fire and damnation.
http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...ml#post1805645

Before he left me in charge, Trollheart did write up a few sections which he knew I would be a tad uncomfortable tackling, like this
http://www.trollheart.com/backfrom.jpg
Gives me the creeps, that hand! Reminds me of when we buried Mister Bunny and then the landfill exploded and ... oh dear Lord .. getting faint again...
Ah, nothing like smelling salts to set you right as rain! So, this week's award goes to that cute little Anteater, whose journal http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...ed-masses.html returns after ... wait for it ... three years absence! Who called that a miracle? Well, sir, I'll have you know that only the Lord can work miracles, and certainly no insectivore! Nevertheless, congratulations, little guy.

And let's not forget
Funny Post
https://cdn1.thehunt.com/app/public/...ea419579cc.png
of the Week

Apparently, the chances are that this will most times go to The Batlord, who's the resident clown around here, so I'm told, and so it is this time. Having scoured the journals I can find little else that would qualify, so from Trollheart's own journal The Couch Potato comes this clear indication that the Batlord does not quite understand the concept of being drunk... and I know what I'm talking about. Once I had a White wine spritzer!

And another section already written by Trollheart, which I wouldn't go near if you gave me a free pass to the Holy Land for life...
http://www.trollheart.com/graveyard2a.jpg
I now hand you over to the man himself...

A lot of people want to write a journal, but few of them realise how much work it's going to entail, and some members will start with great intentions and just peter out, some will updte here and there and then forget about their journal, and some will put everything they have into their writing, ensuring their journal flourishes.

And then there's Robbe264.

Don't know who he is, where he came from, but with the princely sum of 56 posts and a journal that died two years ago, I think we can safely assume he ain't coming back any time soon.

Statistics
Journal title: The Journal of Robbe264
Author: Oddly enough, Robbe264!
Born: March 22 2015
Total views: 246
Total posts: 1
Posts (by author):1
Actual posts by author (ie not just replies to comments): 1
Died: March 22 2015
Graveyard Ranking: A small wooden cross to mark the fact that he did at least try to make an entry, and seemed to have the intention of going through with it, but just, well, didn't. Crows gather on the arms of the cross, pecking at it as if it were something to eat...

Brr! Bit blasphemous there, I feel, Trollheart!

Well, that's it for this week, friends, but don't forget to tune in again next Sunday, when I'll be hosting the first update for March. It's going to be more fun than going to church!
https://static.independent.co.uk/s3f...d-flanders.jpg
May the good Lord bless and keep you all the days of your ... I'm sorry? What was that? Take it where, godboy? Well, really! You, sir, are just rude!

Loved it, TH! There's something comforting about knowing I can always count on this thread for a consistent theme of creative voice, humor, and as a concise summary of what I might have missed in the week prior.

Thanks!

Why thank you very much there, Sir! I do hope I can fill those big shoes Trollheart has left behind without becoming some sort of terrible bighead, but as it says in the Bible ... all right, who took my Bible? I left it right there! Come on! Own up! The Good Book saith A kind word turneth away wrath but I'm feeling pretty gosh-darned diddly doodly wrathful right now!
http://vignette3.wikia.nocookie.net/...20100810232701

Speaking of Jesus: https://nocurfewkids.bandcamp.com/al...ha-lawd-single

What the **** even was that math equation?

The REAL math is in here, my son....
http://i.telegraph.co.uk/multimedia/...b_3259040k.jpg

Math-hew, Mark, Luke and John. Heh heh! I'm just joshin' with ya! Now how about a nice cool glass of Gatorade?
http://cdn1.thecomeback.com/wp-conte.../2016/11/W.jpg

(Jiminy Christmas! I'm gonna have a sore head after this! Must make sure not to miss mass...)

Thanks, TH! I doubt anybody really cared/followed what I was doing, but I felt like getting back to journaling in some form.

Euler's identity. It's a beautiful thing with no practical applications that pure mathematicians drool over.

That update was truly something spectacular. Nicely done, TH.

http://memeguy.com/photos/images/ske...ders-21867.png

Seriously, thanks. I felt I owed you guys something with a bit of thought put into it after leaving you all high and dry for a few weeks...

Was I the only one who hated it and wished he'd have just spoke in his normal voice? I don't know man, it just sort of got on my nerves a bit. But that's just me, you clearly put a load of effort into it regardless so kudos.

Just do whatever you want Trollheart. Can't win them all over.

lol

Mine was so nice it got mentioned twice.

Not the only one. It was anticlimatic. I waited to see a review and all it was was a farce. I agree with you for the most part, but I think the recognition for putting loads of effort into it should go to people who worked on their journals.

http://images5.fanpop.com/image/phot...68-241-320.gif
Dear Lord, help me win these unbelievers over! Send me some assistance. Give me a sign...

Ah. I'm afraid God is a little busy right now, but his good friend Satan asked me to stop by. Bah! He remembered I owe him a favour. Perhaps I can help?
http://cleaneatsfastfeets.com/wp-con...5/Mr-Burns.gif
BWA HA HA HA HA!!!!!
Excellent.
https://i.ytimg.com/vi/D4uPqGBOgd0/hqdefault.jpg

Goddamn y'all are a tough crowd

Lighten the **** up

How about getting that stick that's stuck so far up your ass out of there and actually enjoy life?

That's so weird! I was thinking exactly the same thing. Does he have to be so serious and poe-faced about everything? :beer:

That's flying off the handle a bit. Violet said he hated it, all I said it was anticlimactic after waiting for a review. I like how you rate being disappointed about something a far worse offense than hating something.

I mean, if you want to strip all creativity away from this weekly update, then yeah, you'll get all the reviews you want. But when it's TH's idea in the first place, the last thing anyone should do is tell him that it lacks in creativity and is disappointing. If you'd rather it be different, make a thread just like this one and update it weekly.

I would point out that, yes, there was a large comedy element in it, but I still made sure to include everyone's articles as best I could. I'm not sure what else I could have done, had this been just a "normal" update. I don't tend to go, as you know, deeply into anyone's articles anyway. I just give a basic idea/namecheck normally, so I'm not sure what you're so upset or disappointed about. It's not as if I completely ignored everyone's journals and just ran a comedy article. And I ran all the usual sections too. Also, I've had a very sad and testing time, leading to my absence from here for a while. I wanted something to make me laugh, as well as everyone else. In general it looks like it worked, so I won't be apologising because a few people didn't enjoy it.

And I'll be doing it again this week.

Is this argument still going on?

Hi-dilly-ho, neighborino! Ah, that would be plagiarizing that idea so the answer to that is a 'no.' :nono:

Believe me, I understand that even before you said it, and again I sympathize with you in your situation.

The very instant I saw it was Ned Flanders and it wasn't C Montgomery Burns is the very moment I became disappointed. I just saw it as you Flandering a perfectly good opportunity to be another Simpsons character, that's all. I really don't know if Ned Flanders is your forte. But the masses love it, with the exception of Violet and me of course. So carry on, Okily Dokily?



It's not an argument per se but more of a clarification of one's opinion which is seemingly being misrepresented on a constant and regular basis.

:laughing: now hat's what I call funny.

https://media.giphy.com/media/10rsLtGrOcCR0s/giphy.gif
https://media.giphy.com/media/xT5LMD...yhva/giphy.gif

https://i.ytimg.com/vi/dEcf44ECSY0/hqdefault.jpg
Hello! My name is Mister Snrub, and I come from ... some place far away. I've been asked to ... what? No I am not! Who is he? No, no, different chap altogether I do assure you, though he sounds like a fine fellow. What? He is? Why, I won't just sit here and listen to you impugn my good name - I mean, his good name – Hist! Smithers! The disguise is not fooling them! Well, why not? I wore the fake moustache, didn't I? I even cleverly rearranged the alphabetical characteristics of my nomenclature to throw these Eddie Punchclocks off! How can they know ... I see ... Well, in that case ...
https://media.giphy.com/media/qkZhzF3MDZrfG/giphy.gif
Hah! I am not, as you were so completely convinced I was, the harmless Mister Snrub after all! No, no! I am Charles Montgomery Burns, and unlike poor Ned Flanders – who has been, shall we say, unavoidably detained? - BWA HAHA! - I do NOT bring you love and peace and neighbourly greetings, but fire, pestilence and ... and ... HIST! Smithers! What's the other one? I always get the last one confused. Is it death or woe? Or famine? Blast these metaphors! I see. Very well.

I bring you fire, pestilence and either death or woe, I can't remember which, but I bring it! Oh yes, I can assure you, things will be changing around here now that I'm in charge! What's that you say? Trollheart will be back soon? Well of course he will. After all, it's not as if I laid a trap for him with a sign saying “Free Marillion albums” and then pushed him into a crate and sent it on a slow boat to The Dark Continent, now is it? BWA HA HA! What? Oh, for the love of – all right Smithers: YOU laid a trap for him and pushed him into the ... yes. Yes, indeed. I had nothing to do with it. Innocent party. I mean, look at me, I'm an old man. I could hardly push a healthy young ... what? He's one step removed from a skeleton? Hah! Well then I have one over on him!
http://vignette4.wikia.nocookie.net/...20080510194023
Anyway, for today at least I am in charge, so I'll keep this short:

Friends.
Family.
Religion.
These are the three demons you must slay if you wish to be a successful journal author. Don't tell me that you haven't time: make time! If you're not writing for twenty hours a day on every subject under the sun, then you're not trying hard enough! Bah! Lollygaggers! Jackanapes! Fooswagglers! I should fire you all! What? They don't work for me? Blast it!

Very well then: what you need to know: the three R's. Republicanism! Riches! And, er, and, um ... Smithers? Rhodium? What the blazes – a nuclear element? I don't think so, my old friend. Well, now, we'll just see about that, won't we? Fetch the ninth volume of the Encyclopaedia Britannica down from the shelf. No, not that one: that's my original, first-edition copy of the Necronomicon, signed by Satan. No, Smithers: that's the unedited version of the Bible, with all the good bits left in. Oh for Pete's sake! Isn't it obvious those are the unsold copies of my autobiography, Will there ever be a rainbow? Yes, all of them! Gaah! Blast your hide to Hades! Finally! Now, let's see... what? Well if you can think of a better way to look something up I'd like to hear it, professor science! What? Wiki-what? Oh no: I don't intend to go near anything that sounds like it was put together by a bunch of nig- AH! Here we are. Well I'll be darned: I owe you a Coke!

What's that you say, young fellow? Get on with it, old man? You've just made a powerful enemy, my friend! Oh very well: me, me, me, I need all the attention just because it's my journal. Let's see what illierate scrawls you forum monkeys have been defacing the walls around here with, shall we?

What in blue blazes?? It looks like apart from goody two-shoes Trollheart, only three of you have contributed this week! THREE! Pah! It's hardly worthy my time even reading – what? Contractual what? Well who wrote up that contract? I see. Well, you can tell them I'll see them in court. If these cataracts ever clear up. Oh for the love of Peter! Let's get this over with shall we? Employees don't just fire themselves, you know!

First up we have innerspaceboy. Oh, now there's a clever name! http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...nnerspace.html eh? Well I hate to break it to you, spaceboy, but if it's space there is no sound! Duh! Suppose we can look and see ... ah. Bob Moog! I remember telling him his infernal electrical piano would never work. He wanted me to bankroll it, can you believe – what? It did? Well, blast his hide to Hades!!! The Manhattan Research Inc. Yes, more about the making of the atom bomb, eh? My old pal, Herr Hitler was not so happy about that one. Mind you, even less happy was the Emperor, whose reaction was something along the lines of “Oh no! Big American bomb! Holy fu-” What? I can't? Why the blazes not? Oh very well. He said (sigh) “Holy fiddlesticks!” What else is this cranially-challenged quill-monkey dribbling on about? Salvador Dali, eh? Yes, yes, that reminds me, I should really return this moustache to him. well, to his coffin, of course. All in all, I grudgingly accept, this is quite an engaging read, which I'm sure everyone will enjoy when they read it. I SAID, EVERYONE will enjoy WHEN they read it, not IF! That means you there, you organ bag! Bah! Moving on...

Oh yes, by all means let's spend time at http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...is-arcade.html! You know the sort of place: screen door hanging off the hinges, the smell of smoke in the air, crumpled Buzz Cola cans littering the ground, mangy dogs staggering around looking in vain for a place to die ... BAH! This chair moistener has led me to a dead end, with but a single comment in his journal! Curses! Smithers, have John Romero killed! I SAID, have ...

At least Neapolitan seems to be working, unlike the rest of you wage worms! HE has THREE journals, and while that's only a drop in the ocean of Trollheart's workload, nobody likes Trollheart anyway, do they, so you know, fu – um, fiddlesticks to him. Mister Neapolitan first presents http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...dern-rock.html (Heaven forfend! Modern music! What's wrong, can you tell me, with barqoue Renaissance classical? Why, I remember dancing to ... ah, never mind). What has he got then? Blast these spectacles! Smithers! What do you mean, they're swimming goggles? Bah! That's better. Now, The Ruling Class. And yes, my kind of class. Sulk. Hmm. And Voxtrot? Surely he means Foxtrot, that annoying Genesis album with the lady fox on the cover? Bah! Enough! What else has he? http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...jawn-yall.html . Oh Heaven save us! Rednecks! What does he mean? How dare he disturb my lime ricci for – nothing! No posts save some blasted inane comments! Come back to us when you learn to write, noodlehead. Ah now this is more like it! Fear Itself! You'll find this band in http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...antiquity.html, his third journal.

And that's all we have time for this wee – what? I do? But Smithers! I hate him! We did? He will? Oh, very well then! Bah!

I'm sure nobody is interested, but Smithers advises I'm contractually obliged to cover his journals so...

That rather splendid dead fellow is the subject of http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...d-journal.html – something to do with a knife ... I don't know ... Stanley? Butcher? Chef? - no wait a moment, that's it: Bowie. Yes. Jim Bowie. Fine singer. Trollheart is also rabbiting on about boring progressive rock in http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...ive-metal.html, something about Gentle Giant and the 1970s. http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...-cartoons.html continues while there's some young lady showing her ankles (careful Sir, your heart: you're on your third one!) in http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...d-2000-ad.html – Flasher, or Brightener or something. Dazzler maybe. Who cares?

All right, what's next? Post of the week? Journal Graveyard? Workhorse of the week? Bah! I'm not reading this drivel! This update is over!

http://www.macleans.ca/wp-content/up...om+Service.jpg
Um, Mr. Burns? We're, ah, contractually obliged to read the rest. You signed, remember?
BAH! Do it yourself! I'm off to my club!
http://www.simpsonspark.com/images/p...hers-23009.jpg
Heh heh. Gulp. Come on Waylon, you can do this: for Mister Burns! How hard can it be?

Alright then, as Mr. Burns has, ah, important business matters to see to, he's left me to fill in for him, and I'll be taking you to the end of this thread, er, post, er, update. Yes. Update. That's it. (Let's see: This section is pre-recorded. Push button to play... Okay, then...)

http://www.trollheart.com/graveyard2a.jpg
Sometimes it's really sad when you see a journal begun with the best of intentions, and by someone who you know isn't just (word deleted by Burns Worldwide Industries, “Keeping You Safe Since 1979” - Not Afffiliated with Burns Industries (Three Mile Island) Inc or Burns Soviet Heavy Concern, Chernobyl))ing around, but for whatever reason they just didn't stick to it. Such is or was the debut effort by Devious (whose gender I was never certain of) and it showed such promise. He or she was certainly a great writer, but sadly there wasn't the discipline required, or the interest kept, or a hundred other reasons why this journal sank very quickly.

Statistics
Journal title: I Know You Want the, D
Author: Deviouz
Born: January 20 2014
Total views: 751
Total posts: 6
Posts (by author):3
Actual posts by author (ie not just replies to comments): 2
Died: January 26 2014
Graveyard Ranking: A small stone cross marks the spot where a journal which could have been really interesting was cut down in its prime. Perhaps one day its author will return, but he or she will have to clean off all the bird(word deleted by Burns Worldwide Industries, “Keeping You Safe Since 1979” - Not Afffiliated with Burns Industries (Three Mile Island) Inc or Burns Soviet Heavy Concern, Chernobyl)) before he or she can get it going again.

And now, perhaps overstepping my bounds slightly (is he gone? He's gone isn't he? God, tell me he's gone!) I'd like to (ahem) add my own little contribution by bringing back – without his permission, so I hope Trollheart doesn't mind – a section he used to run way back when.
http://www.trollheart.com/ygoh.png
with
Waylon Smithers
https://i.makeagif.com/media/4-08-2015/C1DL32.gif
When Trollheart began this here section, ah reckon he (what? I'm gong with the cowboy theme the title suggests. Oh I see: you'll accept Yosemite Sam but I can't put on a cowboy voice? Ahem! Anyway...) ah, he meant Young Guns to mean new members with new journals, but since there ain't 'zactly been a whole heap o' new talent moseying over here these last few summers, ah got to thinkin' shoot! Why in tarnation not just have the – Sir!
https://media.giphy.com/media/7u04PkPs5zedG/giphy.gif
I, ah, I thought you had left!
Oh don't mind me, Smithers! I'll (chuckle) just sit here and watch you (giggle) You just continue (guffaw!) on, my friend.
Well, if you'd rather, Sir ...
No no! I'm having a “Way-lon” of a time, I assure you!
Hmm. Well, anyway, here's my pick for the best new journal in recent times.
http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...-saladica.html
It's always good to hear a musician talk about not only his music, but the creative process behind (Sir, are you still laughing? Sigh...) eh, behind it, and Mondo Bungle does this extremely well in his journal. His music may not be to everyone's taste (it certainly is not to mine) but what he does, he not only does well but writes well about. As for the older, more classic journal I'm picking this week (Yes sir, I believe it will be a regular feature, if you have no object – sigh.)
http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...-oblivion.html
If any man knows his comic books and puts poor Trollheart's own comic book journal in the shade, it's The Batlord. Be prepared for much deleting of expletives. As an expert on and go-to source for comics though, this man can't be beat.

That's it then for this week. Hope you –
I'll take it from here Smithers.
I thought you were going to your club Sir?
Oh, go home to your can of cold mushroom soup! I can finish up here.
Sir, a kind word now and again ....?
Bah! Kindness is for the weak! Only the strong survive ... Smithers, could you help me up onto this podium? I'm not as strong as I used to be, and I want a closing tirade. I was promised a closing tirade! It's in the contract! demand my - Ah! There! Now, be off with you!

As for you people, let me just warn you that I had better see an increase in output here by next week, or I'm moving the whole plant to China! What? Oh yes, silly me. Forgot where I was. Well then: you'll all be fired! I'm warning you, I'm not a man to trifle with. So get it done! Or there will be...
.... consequences!

Now, get the hell out of my office!
Smithers!
http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-LxxPr7n5BY...the_hounds.gif
(I'd do what he says, people. This man is not bluffing. I urge you...)
Are you still here? Where are my hounds???!!!!