Official Mental Health Thread

[Tristan_Geoff]

Originally Posted by WWWP

That's great! I miss IOP tbh. I loved feeling like my full time job was working on myself.

What kind of work do you do now? Curious. I’m not pursuing another job until the program is over but it’s gonna be Instacart.

[WWWP]

Originally Posted by Mrs. Tristan Rosenstock

What kind of work do you do now? Curious. I’m not pursuing another job until the program is over but it’s gonna be Instacart.

It's social work but not Social Work.

[Tristan_Geoff]

Originally Posted by WWWP

It's social work but not Social Work.

Interesting, care to explain a bit further? U don't gotta

[OccultHawk]

To other people who have been diagnosed major depression disorder or something similar

This is obviously a personal question but how often do you contemplate suicide?

Do most depressed people think about it everyday?

Like who the **** is really going to mark yes on those questionnaires?

What if you think about it a lot, have a plan, but don’t really think you’re going to go through with it - wtf is up with that?

[Raime]

Originally Posted by OccultHawk

To other people who have been diagnosed major depression disorder or something similar

This is obviously a personal question but how often do you contemplate suicide?

Do most depressed people think about it everyday?

Like who the **** is really going to mark yes on those questionnaires?

What if you think about it a lot, have a plan, but don’t really think you’re going to go through with it - wtf is up with that?

Every day, multiple times a day. I don't tell my doctors because hospitalization is never something I want to experience ever again. I mean, I have a plan, it's just I haven't been pushed that far yet. My uncle only did so after his son passed away, and an argument with my aunt. They had serious marital problems after my cousin passed away (he was blind, deaf, and mentally handicapped). Despair just came all at once, and he just wanted it to end.

[OccultHawk]

R- I wish there wasn’t so much anti-suicide hysteria -not exactly the right word but... -

The problem isn’t following through with it. At that point it’s water under the bridge

The problem is living day after day feeling that bad

I feel like the urgent measures not to let people go through with it make it a lot harder to deal with wanting to do it - being alive and not really wanting to be is the problem

Being dead is obviously not problematic

[goldendoodle]

I think about it daily. When I'm extremely depressed and unmedicated-- like at the very, very bottom of the abyss-- I experience some psychosis and the suicidal thoughts get much worse during that. For instance, I'll convince myself that I'm actually dead (that I died when my brother died) and living in some sort of weird afterlife simulation, and want to kill off my illusory virtual body. Or I'll become hyper-religious out of nowhere and start believing that the world is completely evil and that I must starve myself to death/jump off a building/etc in penance for my attachment to the world, for the great crime of having worldly desires/having a body/being anything but holy and pure. (I was not even raised religious so I have no clue where my hyperreligious episodes come from.)

In my normal depressed state, I'll just idly fantasize about killing myself. I'll conjure up detailed and thorough "back up plans" (for killing myself), and it'll soothe me. While on medication, the thoughts are still there, but they're quieter and less frequent. I've also always fantasized about starving myself to death gradually instead. (even though I know from experience that starving is not fun past the initial euphoria and increased energy)

[OccultHawk]

That’s a beautiful description Chio

I’m sorry that you suffer and if I could I’d make you not suffer but even your suffering is beautiful - it’s ****ing amazing

[WWWP]

Every day, even the good ones. Similar to what Chio said, I daydream about methods to self-sooth. It's never gone away for me, but I don't mind it. But yeah, AOQs are bull****. Once you've been involuntarily held you learn it's much better to lie. They just don't even want to hear it lol. My psychiatrist when I first went into IOP told me if my "suicidal thoughts" score didnt go down she was going to refer me to a year of shock therapy. She was glad to see that they immediately went down and stayed down.

It's so dumb lol. I told my therapist recently that she wasnt helping me and I dont want to continue. Truly, I get better services on YouTube.

[OccultHawk]

I hear ya

It feels like we’re stuck in the ****ing Middle Ages