Worst Way To Die?

~~Cuthbert~~ · 06-12-2018, 10:33 AM

In terms of physical pain it is difficult to top the bronze bull.

This was horrific - https://www.bbc.com/news/uk-england-30114191

Plankton · 06-12-2018, 10:44 AM

This would suck pretty bad:

Quote:

Originally Posted by Anal Impalement

Here's how it worked:

A smooth, thick pole with a narrowed, but blunt, top end would be embedded in the ground. If you think of a width you can barely get the fingers of both hands around, you're probably about right. The height of the pole is carefully adjusted so the top is slightly higher than the victim's behind, when standing on tiptoes. It's a bit like hanging, where you adjust the rope length for the weight of the victim, but in this case we adjust the pole for height.

The pole and the entry point are then smeared with fat or grease. The victim is held above the pole and placed down on it. If the width doesn't quite fit, that's not a problem; simply use a knife to slit from the anus towards the genitals until we have a snug fit. Now the victim is lowered down until they can stand on their own feet on tiptoes.

You see why the pole height varies per person. The pole is in, and the victim can't step off because even on tippy toes, too much of the pole is inside, but to keep it from going further in, the victim has to stand there, and stand, and stand. For days. They can't keep this up forever. Eventually their feet slip a trifle, or they sag, and the pole slips further in. Because it's blunt, it pushes organs to the side as it penetrates. With every slippage, there's a tear and a little more blood loss, weakening the victim, making it harder to stand, so the pole pushes further in, and so on in a vicious cycle. The grease and fat and blood trickling down the pole would have attracted flies and other insects, which would have eaten their way into the wound to add to the torture.

Anal Impalement

The Batlord · 06-12-2018, 11:04 AM

A slow death at the hands of upside down keyboard cleaner might be pretty terrible.

uncle salty · 06-12-2018, 11:45 AM

Being stuck in a room with only Simon & Garfunkel albums.

OccultHawk · 06-12-2018, 12:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Plankton

This would suck pretty bad:

Anal Impalement

Well, I still think my tub death scenario is in the running for second place.

Enjoying a good meal

I don’t know how much the history has been embellished but I remember reading **** about conquering armies impaling entire city populations in the Middle Ages

I wonder what the craziest scene Vlad the Impaler put together looked like

Or nutty **** the Romans did at one point or another.

The Batlord · 06-12-2018, 12:12 PM

I'm just sad that Catherine the Great probably never ****ed any horses.

Psy-Fi · 06-12-2018, 12:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by The Batlord

I'm just sad that Catherine the Great probably never ****ed any horses.

Lucem Ferre · 06-12-2018, 01:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by OccultHawk

Is he unaware that cochlear functions cease operating upon death?

Dude jumped out of a speeding police car for charges that weren't too serious. Of course he is. Plus, you know how simple people gravitate towards ideas and concepts that are aesthetically pleasing rather than logical, thoughtful or grounded in reality. That's how you get morons who shove concepts of being a 'good guy fighting evil' down your throat. It's why religion and occultism is popular. Why people love astrology and talk about being 'spiritual'. The fools!

Trollheart · 06-12-2018, 03:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by [MERIT]

I thought that dying in a fire would be the worst, but I heard that your endorphins kick in and you stop feeling it fairly quickly.

Well apparently you die first of smoke inhalation. It's a horrible death anyway, but I'd prefer it to slowly burning alive.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Frownland

What's worse: being buried alive or being cremated alive?

Buried obv: cremation will hurt but only last a very short time in comparison.

Current: If anyone saw The Following (I think it was anyway), they got this guy into a tiny box, probably two by two feet square or something. When he realised he was going in the box and couldn't understand how he was supposed to fit, the murderer explained that he would give him a shot of something that would paralyse him (but he would feel everything done to him). Then he would break his joints one by one and fold him like a parcel until he fit into the box. All this time he's still alive. I guess he eventually was supposed to die of suffocation. Probably couldn't really happen, but terrifying.

Past: the Romans used to have this thing where they would sew you up into a bag, and also in the bag was a live snake, a dog and a chicken. Then the sack got tossed into the river. Imagine the carnage inside that sack! Doesn't bear thinking about!

**Frownland** · 06-12-2018, 03:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Trollheart

Past: the Romans used to have this thing where they would sew you up into a bag, and also in the bag was a live snake, a dog and a chicken. Then the sack got tossed into the river. Imagine the carnage inside that sack! Doesn't bear thinking about!

Reminds me of what's probably a myth about Native Americans covering people in honey then dropping them in a pit of fire ants. Don't remember if it was a torture or execution thing.

06-12-2018, 10:33 AM	#21 (permalink)
~~Cuthbert~~ Account Disabled Join Date: Nov 2012 Location: The Black Country Posts: 8,827	In terms of physical pain it is difficult to top the bronze bull. This was horrific - https://www.bbc.com/news/uk-england-30114191

06-12-2018, 11:45 AM	#24 (permalink)
uncle salty Music Addict Join Date: Jun 2017 Posts: 74	Being stuck in a room with only Simon & Garfunkel albums.