Racism (Yeah, that's right: I'm callin' it!)

Trollheart · 05-06-2018, 01:58 PM

There are a few problems with knackers (you have to call them travellers - though they don't ****ing travel! - or itinerants if you don't want to get into trouble): first off, they don't seem to be poor. The big knackers families are like Mafia or gangland. They all have **** tons of money. Yet they choose to live as they do. Put them in a house, or a halting site, and all hell breaks loose. They just have their own way of living and they do NOT compromise. At a knacker wedding it's considered dull if there aren't at least three punch-ups and a stabbing! Then there's the ones who come around selling various items you do NOT want, and who will not take no for an answer. Typical conversation:

Door bell rings, often hammering on the door precedes or follows this. Door opens.
"Ah good mornin' boss (they always call you boss), would you like to buy some [insert product: carpet, DVDs, perfume, knife set, pillows etc]? Only twenty euro."
"Ah, no thanks."
"Good quality stuff it is, boss. Cost fifty in the shops."
"No, I'm really not -"
"Fifteen then. Fifteen euro. Givin' them away."
"No I don't want -"
"Ten then. Sure what can ye get for ten euro today? Look at that quality, boss!" etc etc
"No. Look, I don't want it."
"Five then. What d'ye have in yer wallet?"
Door slams in face. It's the only way to get rid of them.
If knackers were salesmen in the real world we'd all end up buying their crap. And you don't want to to give real offence and then have a gang of them visit you, so you have to be polite, but firm.

OccultHawk · 05-06-2018, 02:15 PM

Have you tried not opening the door?

Trollheart · 05-06-2018, 03:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by OccultHawk

Have you tried not opening the door?

Thing is, you don't know who it is and the way they bang on it, it sounds like someone's house is on fire or something. Always sounds urgent. And it's ****ing always at the most inconvenient time.

Oh, and not to mention: if they think you're not home well then it could be over the wall and try to get in. They are ****s. You're better off showing them you're there, preferably with a mean dog. I try to make my cats look mean. I always fail.

OccultHawk · 05-06-2018, 05:12 PM

The only good thing about Florida is the right to murder people for knocking on your door.

The Batlord · 05-06-2018, 06:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by OccultHawk

The only good thing about Florida is the right to murder people for knocking on your door.

Thank god South Eastern Virginia is lazy crazy people. I don't think crabbers can be normal and that's our culture even in subtle ways. We're civilized hillbillies who respect plundering the ocean.

OccultHawk · 05-06-2018, 06:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by The Batlord

Thank god South Eastern Virginia is lazy crazy people. I don't think crabbers can be normal and that's our culture even in subtle ways. We're civilized hillbillies who respect plundering the ocean.

We cheer on billionaires to drill baby drill because they promised us one free tank a gas a year.

Neapolitan · 05-06-2018, 06:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Man like Monkey

Been discussed. It was gypsies.

Yeah, I know that. I was just making sure that Selkies or leprechauns are not the number one concern of Ireland.

So I guess Trollheart's top five groups he tries to avoid:

knackers
leprechauns
Selkies
the drunken mufc family
door to door salesmen

Trollheart · 05-06-2018, 08:51 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Neapolitan

Yeah, I know that. I was just making sure that Selkies or leprechauns are not the number one concern of Ireland.

So I guess Trollheart's top five groups he tries to avoid:

knackers
leprechauns
Selkies
the drunken mufc family
door to door salesmen

Other than selkies you got it. I don't know what selkies are.
Oh, and add in those ****ers who keep getting you to change who you get your gas/electricity/broadband from. Bastards. "What do you mean, you don't want a meter? It could save you ten percent on your bills!"
Yeah well ten percent ain't all that much. My gas bill this month was over 400. Ten percent off that still leaves me too close to 400 for comfort, and I'm old and set in my ways, so **** off before I set the dogs, which I ain't got, on ya!

I do have a perfect answer for the broadband guys though. "What speed you offering?"
"Oh, it's superfast!"
"That is a meaningless term. What actual speed, in megabits per second, are you giving me?"
"Uh, I think it's about 100..."
"I get three times that with my provider. You think I'm gonna change to go with someone who gives me a third of the speed just cos you're giving me a crappy phone free? GTFO." Or words to that effect.

OccultHawk · 05-06-2018, 09:05 PM

Quote:

negative state income tax

It’s so Republican it’s communist.

Who would ever think up an idea that something that comes out of the ground rightfully belongs to everyone?

When it comes to manipulating political language the right wins hands down.

The right makes anything that sells their own. The left is worried about football nicknames.

**Frownland** · 05-06-2018, 09:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Trollheart

before I set the dogs, which I ain't got, on ya!

Goddamnit if you're gonna do the Mr. Burns schtick you're should have said release the hounds.

05-06-2018, 01:58 PM	#551 (permalink)
Trollheart Born to be mild Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: 404 Not Found Posts: 26,996	There are a few problems with knackers (you have to call them travellers - though they don't **ing travel! - or itinerants if you don't want to get into trouble): first off, they don't seem to be poor. The big knackers families are like Mafia or gangland. They all have ** tons of money. Yet they choose to live as they do. Put them in a house, or a halting site, and all hell breaks loose. They just have their own way of living and they do NOT compromise. At a knacker wedding it's considered dull if there aren't at least three punch-ups and a stabbing! Then there's the ones who come around selling various items you do NOT want, and who will not take no for an answer. Typical conversation: Door bell rings, often hammering on the door precedes or follows this. Door opens. "Ah good mornin' boss (they always call you boss), would you like to buy some [insert product: carpet, DVDs, perfume, knife set, pillows etc]? Only twenty euro." "Ah, no thanks." "Good quality stuff it is, boss. Cost fifty in the shops." "No, I'm really not -" "Fifteen then. Fifteen euro. Givin' them away." "No I don't want -" "Ten then. Sure what can ye get for ten euro today? Look at that quality, boss!" etc etc "No. Look, I don't want it." "Five then. What d'ye have in yer wallet?" Door slams in face. It's the only way to get rid of them. If knackers were salesmen in the real world we'd all end up buying their crap. And you don't want to to give real offence and then have a gang of them visit you, so you have to be polite, but firm. __________________ Trollheart: Signature-free since April 2018

05-06-2018, 02:15 PM	#552 (permalink)
OccultHawk one-balled nipple jockey Join Date: Dec 2010 Location: Dirty Souf Biatch Posts: 22,006	Have you tried not opening the door? __________________ 2016 2017 2018 2019 2020 Member of the Year & Journal of the Year Champion Behold the Writing of THE LEGEND: https://www.musicbanter.com/members-...p-lighter.html

05-06-2018, 05:12 PM	#554 (permalink)
OccultHawk one-balled nipple jockey Join Date: Dec 2010 Location: Dirty Souf Biatch Posts: 22,006	The only good thing about Florida is the right to murder people for knocking on your door. __________________ 2016 2017 2018 2019 2020 Member of the Year & Journal of the Year Champion Behold the Writing of THE LEGEND: https://www.musicbanter.com/members-...p-lighter.html