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Old 09-06-2017, 03:54 PM   #221 (permalink)
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Paddy and Murphy are traveling to Australia. Before they leave home, one of their dads gives them both a bit of advice: "You watch them Aussie cab drivers. They'll rob you blind. Don't you go paying them what they ask. You haggle."

At the Sydney airport, the pair catch a cab to their hotel. When they reach their destination, the cabbie says, "That'll be twenty dollars, lads."

"Oh no you don't! My dad warned me about you. You'll only be getting fifteen dollars from me," says Paddy.
"And you'll only be getting fifteen from me too!" adds Murphy.
****ing classic.

Texan walks into an Irish pub, says "Thought you guys had big mountains here? Bah! Why, back home I could stand at the top of one of our mountains and yell MURPHY! and the echo would come back MURPHY MURPHY MURPHy MURPhy MUrphy..."

"Hah! Sure that's nothin'!" says Paddy. "Round here, I can stand at the top of that mountain there and yell MURPHY! And the echo will come back: WHICH MURPHY DO YE WANT???"
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Old 09-06-2017, 03:58 PM   #222 (permalink)
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Paddy is hitch-hiking home, big car pulls up, Merc. Paddy gets in, all wonder. The driver realises he's got a thick gombeen Irishman here and decides to have some fun when Paddy asks about the Mercedes logo on the front. "What's that for?" he asks. Driver says "That, my friend, is a sight. Ye see this guy on the bike here in front? Well now, I just line up the sight, gun the accelerator and ..."
And he roars up to the frightened cyclist, but at the last moment swerves away, laughing. Turning back, he says to Paddy "Close one there! Nearly had him!"
Paddy leans back nonchalantly in the back seat, a grin on his face.
"Sure, no problem boy!" he beams. "Sure didn't I get him with the back door as we went by?"
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Old 09-06-2017, 03:59 PM   #223 (permalink)
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Question for y'all on racist jokes: OK or not? How far is too far? I admit I find a lot of them hilarious.
Much like racism itself, one needs to consider the power dynamic.

If the group being made fun of has social, economic, and political power than I would say it's generally OK.

Man like Monkey's joke is pretty great. Western Europeans (well, not the Irish) have been running the world for the last 300 years or so, so poking fun at their foibles won't earn you much SJW backlash.

For the record, I'm all for anyone telling any joke they want. I might not say it but I'll probably laugh if it's clever or subversively shocking (Kramer's shouting of the n-word failed on both counts, hence his rightful excommunication from the entertainment industry). It's pretty tough to tell a good 'race-based' joke imo.

I prefer terrible puns.

What's Harry Potter's favorite way to get down a hill?



Walking.









Jk, rolling.
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Old 09-06-2017, 04:08 PM   #224 (permalink)
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**** you but lol
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There is only one bright spot and that is the growing habit of disgruntled men of dynamiting factories and power-stations; I hope that, encouraged now as ‘patriotism’, may remain a habit! But it won’t do any good, if it is not universal.
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Old 09-06-2017, 04:09 PM   #225 (permalink)
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TH do you know many anti Brit jokes? I saw a map of Europe a while ago, showing the countries that each nation joked about the most.

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Old 09-06-2017, 04:13 PM   #226 (permalink)
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I particularly like Germany v. Poland and Greece v. Turkey
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There is only one bright spot and that is the growing habit of disgruntled men of dynamiting factories and power-stations; I hope that, encouraged now as ‘patriotism’, may remain a habit! But it won’t do any good, if it is not universal.
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Old 09-06-2017, 06:48 PM   #227 (permalink)
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TH do you know many anti Brit jokes?
Not really. Us Irish prefer slagging each other off. When I was growing up it was stupid Kerryman jokes, like
"How do you keep a Kerryman entertained? Give him a piece of paper with PTO written on both sides" or "How do you keep a Kerryman in suspense? Tell you later." Stuff like that. We Dubs were very superior in our attitude to those "outside the Pale". In a humorous way of course.
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Old 09-06-2017, 06:54 PM   #228 (permalink)
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Not really. Us Irish prefer slagging each other off. When I was growing up it was stupid Kerryman jokes, like
"How do you keep a Kerryman entertained? Give him a piece of paper with PTO written on both sides" or "How do you keep a Kerryman in suspense? Tell you later." Stuff like that. We Dubs were very superior in our attitude to those "outside the Pale". In a humorous way of course.
OK I detect an air of superiority from you, but not so much the humour. Perhaps you fully transitioned from Dub humour to Dad jokery?
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Old 09-06-2017, 06:56 PM   #229 (permalink)
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Old 09-06-2017, 06:57 PM   #230 (permalink)
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OK I detect an air of superiority from you, but not so much the humour. Perhaps you fully transitioned from Dub humour to Dad jokery?
I really don't care what you detect. You need to be Irish to understand. We're "The Big Smoke", all others are "culchies" and "bogjumpers" and so forth. Yeah.
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