Hypothetical: You're the sole beneficiary of a will

Trollheart · 08-21-2017, 05:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by The Batlord

I get paid to avoid human contact? I do that free. Total yes.

I knew this would be you. You wouldn't even have to say thank you for the pizza: it would be delivered to you and the remains (if any) taken away without any human contact being needed. Your utopia, yes?

Quote:

Originally Posted by Frownland

And my answer to that question is that I would win the case on my uncle's poor wording and walk away with 50 mil and a masked posse.

No, you wouldn't. These are some of the highest-priced lawyers money can buy. Any man who can leave fifty mill and a mansion can afford the cream of Harvard Law School, or whatever.

Quote:

Originally Posted by grindy

Too easy.
Loneliness, isolation and lots of money = one hell of a depression

Very true.

Quote:

Originally Posted by OccultHawk

I want 500 M and another 20 M per year

Too easy to burn through 50

Sorry; you'll have to remain on the poverty line with a mere fifty mill. Maybe you can start an appeal?

Anyone who wishes to can consider this their chance to pose questions about the will. Essentially, you're in the solicitor's office and can ask what you want before signing. Or you can just grab the deal as is.

**Frownland** · 08-21-2017, 05:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Trollheart

No, you wouldn't. These are some of the highest-priced lawyers money can buy. Any man who can leave fifty mill and a mansion can afford the cream of Harvard Law School, or whatever.

This kind of arrogance will be what wins me the case. Contracts are literal as ****, sloppy writing is to be interpreted as such.

Oriphiel · 08-21-2017, 05:59 PM

Take the 50 mil, give each of your uncle's lawyers a bribe to get them on your side, and then walk away with the rest.

The Batlord · 08-21-2017, 06:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Trollheart

Anyone who wishes to can consider this their chance to pose questions about the will. Essentially, you're in the solicitor's office and can ask what you want before signing. Or you can just grab the deal as is.

Do the terms of the will include police payoffs so they won't show up at your house and arrest you face-to-face if you hire a hitman online and have him record a murder for your own sick amusement?

OccultHawk · 08-21-2017, 07:53 PM

Is payment for the staff and the mansion upkeep already paid or is it taken out of our 50 M?

Trollheart · 08-21-2017, 08:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Frownland

This kind of arrogance will be what wins me the case. Contracts are literal as ****, sloppy writing is to be interpreted as such.

Arrogance is what gets lawyers up in the morning. They'll eat you alive.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Oriphiel

Take the 50 mil, give each of your uncle's lawyers a bribe to get them on your side, and then walk away with the rest.

These people are unbribe-able. Steps have been taken to ensure it is so. Nobody's quite sure which of their relatives have been kidnapped, but let's just say there's a cabin in the woods somewhere, with a man who spends his evenings promising his AK47 "Soon, my pet. Soon ...."

Quote:

Originally Posted by The Batlord

Do the terms of the will include police payoffs so they won't show up at your house and arrest you face-to-face if you hire a hitman online and have him record a murder for your own sick amusement?

You're free to do as you like with the money. Whether they will decide to double-cross you and report you after/before the murder, I can't say. That's a chance you'll have to take.

Quote:

Originally Posted by OccultHawk

Is payment for the staff and the mansion upkeep already paid or is it taken out of our 50 M?

It's already paid. Uncle Eggnog made his money in Trump futures and this fifty mill is a drop in the ocean compared to the rest of his estate.

**Frownland** · 08-21-2017, 08:30 PM

This isn't very realistic.

The Batlord · 08-21-2017, 08:32 PM

Can I have a sexbot?

Trollheart · 08-21-2017, 08:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Frownland

This isn't very realistic.

It's hypothetical. What's unrealistic about it? Ain't you never watched Brewster's Millions?

Quote:

Originally Posted by The Batlord

Can I have a sexbot?

You have fifty mil. You can buy whatever you want. Maybe one that looks exactly like Harley Quinn, if you want.

**Frownland** · 08-21-2017, 08:59 PM

Can we be test subjects for the singularity?

08-21-2017, 05:59 PM	#13 (permalink)
Oriphiel Ask me how! Join Date: Oct 2014 Location: The States Posts: 5,354	Take the 50 mil, give each of your uncle's lawyers a bribe to get them on your side, and then walk away with the rest. __________________ ---------------------- \|---Mic's Albums---\| ---------------------- ----------------------------- \|---Deafbox Industries---\| -----------------------------

08-21-2017, 07:53 PM	#15 (permalink)
OccultHawk one-balled nipple jockey Join Date: Dec 2010 Location: Dirty Souf Biatch Posts: 22,006	Is payment for the staff and the mansion upkeep already paid or is it taken out of our 50 M? __________________ 2016 2017 2018 2019 2020 Member of the Year & Journal of the Year Champion Behold the Writing of THE LEGEND: https://www.musicbanter.com/members-...p-lighter.html

08-21-2017, 08:30 PM	#17 (permalink)
Frownland SOPHIE FOREVER Join Date: Aug 2011 Location: East of the Southern North American West Posts: 35,541	This isn't very realistic. __________________ Studies show that when a given norm is changed in the face of the unchanging, the remaining contradictions will parallel the truth. d e a f b o x

08-21-2017, 08:59 PM	#20 (permalink)
Frownland SOPHIE FOREVER Join Date: Aug 2011 Location: East of the Southern North American West Posts: 35,541	Can we be test subjects for the singularity? __________________ Studies show that when a given norm is changed in the face of the unchanging, the remaining contradictions will parallel the truth. d e a f b o x