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Old 05-24-2016, 07:47 PM   #71 (permalink)
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All right. That's your call.
No it's not. If it was truly his call, then God wouldn't chuck him into a lake of fire for all eternity for making it. Thankfully no one really believes in god anymore, so we can just ignore his bull**** edicts and get back to the important things in life, like pre-marital sex, drug abuse, and listening to Slayer.
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Originally Posted by J.R.R. Tolkien
There is only one bright spot and that is the growing habit of disgruntled men of dynamiting factories and power-stations; I hope that, encouraged now as ‘patriotism’, may remain a habit! But it won’t do any good, if it is not universal.
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Old 05-24-2016, 07:49 PM   #72 (permalink)
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Here. Just a google search away.
"It turns us and our sexuality away from God and toward ourselves"

Well god, I'm flattered, but I never really thought of you in that way. I guess I'm going to have to keep masturbating to myself.
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Old 05-24-2016, 07:56 PM   #73 (permalink)
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"It turns us and our sexuality away from God and toward ourselves"

Well god, I'm flattered, but I never really thought of you in that way. I guess I'm going to have to keep masturbating to myself.
Dude, I know God's technically a dude, but he's omnipotent. He could change into a smoking hot chick, and I'll bet someone who's omniscient knows exactly how to suck your dick.
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Originally Posted by J.R.R. Tolkien
There is only one bright spot and that is the growing habit of disgruntled men of dynamiting factories and power-stations; I hope that, encouraged now as ‘patriotism’, may remain a habit! But it won’t do any good, if it is not universal.
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Old 05-24-2016, 07:57 PM   #74 (permalink)
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i didn't know we were supposed to love god like that
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Old 05-24-2016, 08:02 PM   #75 (permalink)
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i didn't know we were supposed to love god like that
I don't think you'd be interested. You can't bang God while he's still a dude, otherwise it would be gay. And then you go to hell, and GOD goes to hell too. You can't have that ****.

OMG I just figured out why homosexuality is a sin!
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Originally Posted by J.R.R. Tolkien
There is only one bright spot and that is the growing habit of disgruntled men of dynamiting factories and power-stations; I hope that, encouraged now as ‘patriotism’, may remain a habit! But it won’t do any good, if it is not universal.
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Old 05-24-2016, 08:04 PM   #76 (permalink)
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Dude, I know God's technically a dude, but he's omnipotent. He could change into a smoking hot chick, and I'll bet someone who's omniscient knows exactly how to suck your dick.
There's only one Christian figure I wanna ****

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Old 05-24-2016, 08:07 PM   #77 (permalink)
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Queer. TBH I can't go a day without thinking about the Virgin Mary's tits. To suckle from the teet that nurtured Our Lord would be the sweetest taboo.
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Originally Posted by J.R.R. Tolkien
There is only one bright spot and that is the growing habit of disgruntled men of dynamiting factories and power-stations; I hope that, encouraged now as ‘patriotism’, may remain a habit! But it won’t do any good, if it is not universal.
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Old 05-24-2016, 08:10 PM   #78 (permalink)
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God's the one that wants me turning my sexuality towards him. I wonder if this whole thing is a misunderstanding, because god only wanks towards himself and thinks that's how all the humans do it. I'm usually thinking about other people during, so that probably falls within the rules.
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Old 05-24-2016, 08:11 PM   #79 (permalink)
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Dude, I know God's technically a dude, but he's omnipotent. He could change into a smoking hot chick, and I'll bet someone who's omniscient knows exactly how to suck your dick.

That gives a whole new meaning to "fuck the lord".
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Basically you're David Hasselhoff.
Gentle Giant Catalog Review

The entire Ditty Bops catalog reviewed
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Old 05-24-2016, 08:12 PM   #80 (permalink)
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I don't think you'd be interested. You can't bang God while he's still a dude, otherwise it would be gay. And then you go to hell, and GOD goes to hell too. You can't have that ****.

OMG I just figured out why homosexuality is a sin!
this actually makes more sense than any explanation on all of those christian sites i've been on.
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