The many benefits of a child-free life

Xurtio · 04-09-2014, 07:05 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ladyislingering

it's pretty incredible that women are capable of making another human; that's pretty badass and scientific and whatnot. (but it's not for everyone.)

would it improve your life?

would it be worth it?

It's domain-specific. It improves some parts of your life but competes with other parts of your life. Most people don't have kids on purpose, believe it or not... otherwise the human race would have died out long ago.

Once you have kids though, you magically fall in love with them and they bring you joy in a lot of ways that you might have never predicted (of course, they also bring frustrations and are a drain on resources).

Is it worth it? Pre-parent me would say hell no, post-parent me says hell yes. So... my advice is don't have kids, and you'll never know what you're missing.

ladyislingering · 04-09-2014, 01:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Xurtio

So... my advice is don't have kids, and you'll never know what you're missing.

Everything I'm "missing", compact edition:

No sleep (this will persist for the rest of the child's life) due to (but obviously not limited to)

Crying baby won't shut the hell up
Crying baby just shit itself (again)
Crying baby is awake at 2am...and 4am...and 7am...
Toddler child is learning how to use the toilet
Toddler child just pissed all over its bed again
Toddler child is terrified of the bathroom
Toddler child is having night terrors
Child-child is having night terrors
Preteen child is still awake at 1am and you know it, and it bothers you
Preteen child is trying to sneak out at night despite your best efforts to raise them to not be a piece of shit
Teenager isn't going to bed on time because "fuck you, mom"
Teenager has stayed out past their curfew and doesn't have the decency to call you

Your children will always be a financial drain on you until they get a goddamn job.

Furthermore, a lot of things you once enjoyed become unpleasant, such as (but not limited to) -

Having any "quiet time" whatsoever, because it's probably being spoiled by the anxiety that your child will erupt at any given second.

Shopping. Anywhere. The minute Mt. Shitpants erupts, everyone hates you.

Having pets (because your child is curious - and also an asshole).

Eating. Because your child is drooling all over their face, smearing food everywhere, getting food particles into the weirdest areas of their head, and when they're older, they're bound to have an attitude problem over whatever it is you're serving.

And don't even start to tell me that I'm just focusing on the baby/toddler aspect. I'm well aware that preteens and teenagers are the absolute worst, rotten to the core, no matter how good of a parent you are. Just because you don't have to wipe their ass or dress them anymore doesn't mean they're not a huge pain in your ass.

I don't like people. Period. I don't want to be in charge of a person because no parent is perfect, and not everyone who manages to breed can actually be considered a "parent".

There is literally nothing I'm "missing", thank you very much, but there's a hell of a lot of awesome stuff in my life that isn't being ruined by a child right now.

Plankton · 04-09-2014, 01:51 PM

My daughter called me the other day in between classes at college just to tell me that I'm an awesome Dad, and that she loves me.

/boast

carry on

FRED HALE SR. · 04-09-2014, 01:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Plankton

My daughter called me the other day in between classes at college just to tell me that I'm an awesome Dad, and that she loves me.

/boast

carry on

For every story about the disadvantages of having a kid, there really is no better thing that can happen to a person then bringing life into the world.

Xurtio · 04-09-2014, 02:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ladyislingering

Everything I'm "missing", compact edition:

No sleep (this will persist for the rest of the child's life) due to (but obviously not limited to)

Crying baby won't shut the hell up
Crying baby just shit itself (again)
Crying baby is awake at 2am...and 4am...and 7am...
Toddler child is learning how to use the toilet
Toddler child just pissed all over its bed again
Toddler child is terrified of the bathroom
Toddler child is having night terrors
Child-child is having night terrors
Preteen child is still awake at 1am and you know it, and it bothers you
Preteen child is trying to sneak out at night despite your best efforts to raise them to not be a piece of shit
Teenager isn't going to bed on time because "fuck you, mom"
Teenager has stayed out past their curfew and doesn't have the decency to call you

Your children will always be a financial drain on you until they get a goddamn job.

Furthermore, a lot of things you once enjoyed become unpleasant, such as (but not limited to) -

Having any "quiet time" whatsoever, because it's probably being spoiled by the anxiety that your child will erupt at any given second.

Shopping. Anywhere. The minute Mt. Shitpants erupts, everyone hates you.

Having pets (because your child is curious - and also an asshole).

Eating. Because your child is drooling all over their face, smearing food everywhere, getting food particles into the weirdest areas of their head, and when they're older, they're bound to have an attitude problem over whatever it is you're serving.

And don't even start to tell me that I'm just focusing on the baby/toddler aspect. I'm well aware that preteens and teenagers are the absolute worst, rotten to the core, no matter how good of a parent you are. Just because you don't have to wipe their ass or dress them anymore doesn't mean they're not a huge pain in your ass.

I don't like people. Period. I don't want to be in charge of a person because no parent is perfect, and not everyone who manages to breed can actually be considered a "parent".

There is literally nothing I'm "missing", thank you very much, but there's a hell of a lot of awesome stuff in my life that isn't being ruined by a child right now.

There's something overly dramatic about your post. I can't quite put my finger on it...

FRED HALE SR. · 04-09-2014, 02:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Xurtio

There's something overly dramatic about your post. I can't quite put my finger on it...

djchameleon · 04-09-2014, 02:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Xurtio

There's something overly dramatic about your post. I can't quite put my finger on it...

Lol. I was thinking the same thing

Also poor lady didn't have any pets growing up. So sad.

zombie kid · 04-09-2014, 05:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ladyislingering

Everything I'm "missing", compact edition:

No sleep (this will persist for the rest of the child's life) due to (but obviously not limited to)

Crying baby won't shut the hell up
Crying baby just shit itself (again)
Crying baby is awake at 2am...and 4am...and 7am...
Toddler child is learning how to use the toilet
Toddler child just pissed all over its bed again
Toddler child is terrified of the bathroom
Toddler child is having night terrors
Child-child is having night terrors
Preteen child is still awake at 1am and you know it, and it bothers you
Preteen child is trying to sneak out at night despite your best efforts to raise them to not be a piece of shit
Teenager isn't going to bed on time because "fuck you, mom"
Teenager has stayed out past their curfew and doesn't have the decency to call you

Your children will always be a financial drain on you until they get a goddamn job.

Furthermore, a lot of things you once enjoyed become unpleasant, such as (but not limited to) -

Having any "quiet time" whatsoever, because it's probably being spoiled by the anxiety that your child will erupt at any given second.

Shopping. Anywhere. The minute Mt. Shitpants erupts, everyone hates you.

Having pets (because your child is curious - and also an asshole).

Eating. Because your child is drooling all over their face, smearing food everywhere, getting food particles into the weirdest areas of their head, and when they're older, they're bound to have an attitude problem over whatever it is you're serving.

And don't even start to tell me that I'm just focusing on the baby/toddler aspect. I'm well aware that preteens and teenagers are the absolute worst, rotten to the core, no matter how good of a parent you are. Just because you don't have to wipe their ass or dress them anymore doesn't mean they're not a huge pain in your ass.

I don't like people. Period. I don't want to be in charge of a person because no parent is perfect, and not everyone who manages to breed can actually be considered a "parent".

There is literally nothing I'm "missing", thank you very much, but there's a hell of a lot of awesome stuff in my life that isn't being ruined by a child right now.

Do you really think that people who want children don't realize any of that? What a fucking dramatic and unnecessary post (since you've already stated your feelings so many times in this topic). Your feelings are not going to sway people who have already made up their mind. Accept that people want different things in their life that will make them happy. It's fine to not want kids, but stop shoving it down everyone's throats.

**Janszoon** · 04-09-2014, 07:05 PM

That's it, I'm making a baby tonight.

Xurtio · 04-09-2014, 07:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by zombie kid

Do you really think that people who want children don't realize any of that? What a fucking dramatic and unnecessary post (since you've already stated your feelings so many times in this topic). Your feelings are not going to sway people who have already made up their mind. Accept that people want different things in their life that will make them happy. It's fine to not want kids, but stop shoving it down everyone's throats.

I don't even think the post was accurate, really. It played on semi-truths blown way out of proportion, and was loaded with the premise that we really have better things to do. If there wasn't so much effort put into it, I'd think they were trolling.

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04-09-2014, 01:51 PM	#423 (permalink)
Plankton Just Keep Swimming... Join Date: Apr 2012 Location: See signature... Posts: 7,765	My daughter called me the other day in between classes at college just to tell me that I'm an awesome Dad, and that she loves me. /boast carry on __________________ See location...

04-09-2014, 07:05 PM	#429 (permalink)
Janszoon Mate, Spawn & Die Join Date: May 2007 Location: The Rapping Community Posts: 24,593	That's it, I'm making a baby tonight. __________________ A Night in the Life of the Invisible Man Time & Place 25 Albums You Should Hear Before the Moon Crashes into the Earth and We All Die last.fm